Hi guys, this is my first lay that im documenting and the main reason is that I found it to be extremely funny and gross at the same time. Also, I am not by any means a PUA, more of an AFC but I am one of those bastards that pretty good looking and that gets me by.

So this HB messages me on a dating site im on and was a 7, but 9 years older than me. I am 30. Within the first two messages she asks me what im online for and I was straight up with her, told her im not on for anything serious. The rest of the convo I have below.

HB: I like that your very direct and honest about your intentions, I'm the same way...I never bite my lip when I want to speak my mind...I also like what I see....
Me: i also like that you're in my neighborhood whats your name anyways,
HB: What street are you on?
Me: (I tell her the streets im near)
HB: (She tells me the cross streets shes on)
Me: Can't walk it but close enough lol
HB: Well drive it
Me: might just have too....send me your number. I'd like to match a voice with the face and make sure we're not getting cat fished

Three or four weeks go by and I didnt call her then one day I got horny and texted her.

Me: what are you doing tonight?
HB: Im getting yogurt and dinner, wanna come over and feed me and fuck me like theres no tomorrow?

After an hour I text her back, "dont mind if I do". Setup a meeting 2 hours later. She sends me an address which isnt her house, its a girl friends and in a ghetto kinda area. I was skeptical so googled it and did the whole street view thing. I pick up some condoms, drive to her place and was seriously thinking of bailing but my dick got the better of me and I called her from outside and she opens the door and this woman was just hideous. Slightly over weight, ghetto, no effort in how she looked. She calls me in and her friend is on the couch who smiles at me. She takes me to her room and right away starts caressing my cock and making out with me. I wanted it to stop but i was horny so i get off the bed, pull her pants off without saying a word and start rubbing her, pull off my pants and had her give me a bj. Literally fucked her mouth all the way without any remorse, pull out the condom fucked her for two minutes and I had enough so I came right away. Pull out and the look on her face was of astonishment and she goes "are you kidding me?". I didnt say a word, asked her where her bathroom was. As Im cleaning up inside i hear her telling her friend what just happened and her friend just starts laughing. I walk out, at the door I kinda apologize and she like "no worries".

As im walking off the porch, she opens the door again and says, "do me a favor, loose my number" I turn around with a huge smile trying to control my laughter and drive away. Ive been feeling dirty for the last 4 hours now, one of those lays I want to forget cuz she was literally a -6.

Just wanted to post this cuz although I was a total dick, I found it hillarious.