OK here's my first lay report so let me know what you think.

A couple of months back I went to Ireland (Dublin) for a week on business. I didn't know anyone there but I wanted people to hang out in the evenings so I went on couch surfing and sent out a few messages. Disclaimer here: couchsurfing is NOT for PU, don't get the wrong idea. I was not out to get laid at this point, just find some people to hang out with.

I messaged a few people and this one Argentinian girl got back to me, so I went to meet her the next day after work. The first time I saw her, I would have said HB8 but retrospectively HB7 at best. Still wasn't really planning on making a move since it was a couchsurfing meet but I decided I would just game her like any other girl and see what happened. I was in a really good mood at the time so I was very confident from the start, there was a lot of smiling, laughing and staring straight away and I knew it was on in about the first 5 minutes. This is a unique situation that I think can only arise from a pre-arranged meet-up (no opener required!).

I had driven to pick her up straight from work so I drove her back to my hotel and went back up to my room to change, she came with obviously. I did some standard flirting like when we entered the hotel room I jokingly through her on the bed and when I was changing was saying things like "Hey, no peeking, I know what you Argentinians are like" etc.

We then went to a couple of bars in town and met up with two more couchsurfers (AFC guys) I was gradually escalating kino with this girl and flirting and they couldn't believe it, they literally couldn't believe that I had just met her an hour ago and were looking on in awe. When she went out for a cigarette one of the guys was saying shit like "dude, you're awesome, you're definitely getting laid tonight". It felt pretty good to get some validation of my game.

The girl kept giving me IOIs like hair and kino and I just played it cool and we moved on. It took us a while to find a decent place and when we got there we couldn't find any seats and everyone seemed to be a little on edge so I felt I had to do something. I clocked a two set of HB6s sat around a table that could accommodate us so I went over and said Hi. I knew this would also pose to create a jealousy plot line and it worked a treat, I chatted to them for a couple of minutes and then gestured the others over. I felt pretty alpha, the Argentinian girl couldn't stop touching me.

After a few minutes the other guys left so it was just me and the girl, I kiss-closed by looking in here eyes and just leaning straight in. I didn't let it get too heavy and then she said she would walk me back to my hotel. I said OK.

We got outside the hotel and she said she would get a taxi back. I thought she was kind of hinting for me to invite her up and I did, but I think it was pretty lame, I said something like: "you can crash here if you like, there's plenty of room for the two of us, but don't expect anything I've got work tomorrow." She took the taxi option. Where did I go wrong!?

I met up with her a couple more times briefly while in Ireland and then she came to London a few weeks later so I said she could stay with my brother and that I would come up for the weekend too. I met here off the train and we both new exactly what was going to happen from the word go, we went back to my bro's house, smoked some weed, drank some wine and then fucked in the spare room. She was a semi-decent lay, won't go into too much detail as that's not the point at hand here.

The weird part was that in the morning I woke up and felt absolutely no attraction for her, she just pissed me off from that point onwards by not understanding what I was saying (her English wasn't that great) and kept saying "what" and "eh" so I was repeating myself the whole time. Didn't shag her again and was glad when she went back to Ireland.

Do you think I just needed to get it out of my system with this girl? It's weird that I was suddenly no longer attracted to her.

Synergy.

I know exactly what you mean... I lost attraction with a chick i f-closed almost immediately. You were just horny and wanted to fuck. No biggie.

btw, for the hotel incident, I think you should've told her you wanted to show her something or invited her for a drink instead of telling her she can crash there for the night.

You had no connection with this girl. You just wanted to fk and dump. It's cool. Not a girl you want a relationship with.

_________________
Don't Follow Someone Else's Path. Carve your Own. Be the person that you want to be not everyone else. Be Unique.

Hey man,

Great work and mad props big congrats on a first lay report!
In a few years time when you forget about this you will come back and reread it and see it in a totally different light.

I visit Dublin myself every now and then so maybe catch up with you there sometime.


[quote]Disclaimer here: couchsurfing is NOT for PU[/quote]

Im really glad you brought this up think thats important to say, shows a lot of intelligence on your part.

When a girl I was seeing told me about couch surfing she instantly followed up by saying "Its Not For Fucking Though Ok Darren!?!"

The first impression can make such a big deal so its great that you are making a good one maybe think back over for the reason why obviously the good mood and confidence so you want to keep this in the future.

Nice how you playfully tease her, its also great when you see your game moving towards the place where guys start commenting on it.

I think this is very important even for a lot of lays this is nearly always a good line to take. However in this scenario and how you guys met and because its couch surfing and you know you can meet again it's probably the best to play it cool like this.


This is really Balla of you!! And for the record its probably good at the moment you did it with a table of HB6 because it's going to be much easier to get to sit with them over say a HB9 table.

Your kiss close sounds solid its a really good idea to look at the girls lips briefly and then look in the eyes before going for a kiss. Also good work on the kiss take away by not going heavy.
In a situation like this, the first KClose, It should be smooth and just act as a little prelude for things to come later.
Its just really an integral SOI where you truly break rapport from attraction/comfort to actual show sexual interest in each other. One does not need to go heavy because that would be a prelude to physical end game which cant be done right there.


Ok a few points if you were going for the same night lay.
1) By going up to the HB6 table and getting everyone sitting down you demonstrated great leadership/direction and general alphaness you showed the ability to move things forward.
By doing that she would expect you to show the same traits in bringing her back to yours or going to hers.
Its good you did invite her and actually tried move it forward but it was a bit weak, you could only manage "a semi" hah.
If it some how got to that point I wouldn't have said crash but invented a cool thing to do.


2) Instead of just saying yes to her walk you back to the hotel thing ignore that, and change topics then a bit later either bring up something awesome you have to show her back at the hotel (Your travelling photos, a good movie etc)
Or bring up the idea of getting a bottle of wine and chilling at yours for a bit.
Direct the conversation about 30 mins* after the first KClose into reasons to go back to yours or hers, so before you both leave its already being arranged where you go next.

*=(30mins in which time you want a bit deeper rapport and a little bit more kissing)


She wouldn't bring up going back to your hotel because you brought it up where to go next. If she does bring it up before you then guide/direct it just get it in order how you will bring her in.
In this scenario I would talk about the awesome thing you have back at yours and make sure you have something, talk about that before you leave the club just bring it up without saying you will show her it or anything. You oversell it whatever it is.
I once brought a girl back on the "premise" I have this most amazing pop corn machine maker. But I only had a microwave and a bag of popcorn.

As you walk closer you can talk about it more, and then whenever you're ready just tell her she's just gotta see this awesome thing, even for just a minute, just get her back up there.You just need an excuse for her to rationalise coming back inside to a hotel with you. (not all girls need this depending on game beforehand but its a safe way to ensure)

Try have this kinda thing sorted beforehand, as you read my LR You will notice I talked about the tv series 'Arrested Development' as the reason to come back for the girl. I talked about it well into the earlier stages of the set spoke on how I have every episode etc how great it is.


In terms of the real reason for your loss of interest
Its a mix of things.
The male "Refractory period " will play a big role straight after you cum. Without being too scientific here your levels of oxytocin and prolactin increase which repress all dopamine in you.
Dopamine is the reason why you wanna fuck her in the first place a build up of that its the chemical name for what sexual desire is.

When this all kicks in and you loose interest/dopamine your mind starts kinda hating her and you find things to dislike.
You then may start rationalising why you dont wanna see her, this is the low levels of dopamine (which is the connection feeling of love, sexual desire chemical etc) , it all happens so you spread your seed when not highly connected to a girl.

And when you dont have a good solid emotional connection to a girl the loss of high levels of dopamine wont be offset by a NON strong connection. So you're just feel like meh fuck that I don't like her, i fucked her emptied the desire I had, so next girl, you might even feel like you want to kick her out, you literally 360 in feelings.

Thats a brief over view of the loss of desire of it im sure you are more than capable of researching more into yourself should you desire so


So nice work man loads of epic positives, and I get the impression you pretty much know what you're doing anyway really so the next few lays are just a foregone conclusion

Keep it up playa!

Polyamorously Yours,
-Darren / Future