Lay report about a useless fuck turning into something romantic -- > a memorable noteworthy meeting
ok so i met this woman.... vibing.. got her email .. after that i got her number...started talking to her over the internet.
very dominant aggresive woman (40 year old).. very cocky funny in general , great personality... very very hot and really got her life together.
We talked and called for like 3 months...maybe you have some of my post about my inner game - this is the same woman that im dealing with. Normally i close and fuck in 1 days.. 2 days.. 2 weeks max , because if a woman isn't attracted she isn't attracted , period.
Everytime she promised to meet.. maybe like 10 times or more.. but for weeks it just didn't go nowhere and she played all kind of games, i started playing back getting swallowed up in '' the game''... Internet chat is extra addictive, something i actually don't like but hey, ...there is no way im going to back down, playing it to the hilt.
one day i was tired .. i was like why the fuck am i talking and doing a 3 months pickup lol .. what the fuck is wrong with me... i was like ok fuck this shit..i like her as friend etc but it isn't going anywhere and she keeps flaking.
i just called her and said i wanted to fuck her brains out and make her come in everyway possible... suddenly she became more receptive and everything turned to a sexual frame. it's long distance so we are still restricted to the phone and using a webcam...we start talking like usual, good conversation - enjoyable at least. We started talking about what we both want... she didn't want any relationship she just wants to fuck...no strings attached... i agreed....
for me it was extra exciting because woman who flake alot are flaky as hell... but i wanted a new experience in my life so i decided to just go with the flow... my game was totally trusting her a 100 %... i don't trust people so this was very hard for me, and being open 100 % to new experiences... looking backright now , these 2 things were my game and it made it much of a better experience.
Yesterday i arrived after a long sit in the train... i saw this awesome sports car and walked up to it , opened the door and introduced...hot woman .. slim...just awesome.. nothing to complain about..we arrive at her place so we chat about life, fucking, spirituality, surgery just regular stuff. Even tho there was no structure at all in our convos this woman there was just a really good vibe...her house was filled with goodfeel energy.
So we pop some bottles.. drink some cocktails listening to some hardstyle, dance music while enjoying the candles and whispering flames which could be seen in her fireplace...it was pure warmth , i never felt uncomfortable for one second.. it was like we were there to do nothing - there was no intention, no thought... just enjoying the moment... our personalities really are the opposite.. im more fixing eye contact, being calm and passive aggresive.. she's more open, talking alot , moving alot etc... just good chemistry in general... there was no escalation.. i was doing alot of kino but she wasn't really receptive to any escalation.
here is the weird thing.. it was just a casual hangout.. she fucks more men etc.. i never had the idea of a connection or anything... i wasn't seeing her/ looking for a GF... i was just trying to enjoy the experience and vibes.. After a while we start listening to some john mayer...it felt like we were hypnotized by his music and i really like the serene, sedated athmospere which clears every thought from your mind... it was total peace.
everything just went with the flow...
i looked at her and i don't know what happened but i couldn't look away.. only feeling the firelike warmth of alcohol in my body.. she asked if i was tired and replied ''yes.. how do you know
''... she told me i look tired and without really listenting to what she says i just nodded yes...
so we went up to her bedroom..a huge bed...she undressed and got into bed... me doing the same thing. got some compliments on how hot i looked.. but those compliments never achieved the same value as the serene flow we were in. We were laying in bed looking eachother in the eyes for like 1 minute.. she turned off the lights..
she asked '' do you want sex with me ''
me '' do you really have to ask that ... stupid question'' and kiss closed...
it was fucking great.. she had like 11 orgasms.. we fucked really hard.. but it wasn't a worthless fuck .. alot of play and kissing , it just felt intimate... i just expected some hard fucks which would get boring soon but that wasn't the case After we fucked we just hold eachother..really tight and close...we talked and she fell asleep in my arms, while i was talking i just heard my words turning into whispers and the whispers turning into the timeless passionate nights.... the night got into my head and i slept.
i woke up and i was so at peace .. i tried to acces thoughts about what happened.. it just felt like i was in another reality.. like a meditation. after a few minutes she rolled to me i just put my arms around her being enjoying her warmth and her excellent physique. We talked about alot of stuff...it was very pleasant and enjoyable... we started to kiss quitte passionate.. at this point i didn't knew if i was just a fuck buddy or just a romantic long term interest...
i start massaging her... we kissed and fucked again ( no condom :S) .. looking eachother in the eyes and kissing very passionate..2 hours later we just cuddles.. kissed.. caressed.. holding hands .. giving eachother nicknames and funny compliments. talked about relationships and how i've never been in love... She got up i stayed in bed getting some additional sleep...
i woke up she was bussy doing shit.. she just embraced me from behind and kissing me.. i was totally confused but in acceptance.. we got downstairs - getting some breakfast.
she started talking about her kids.. how she lives life and what she's going to do.. i just nodded and ate my breakfast...she asked how old i am.. answered and she was really confused.. she told me her son had the same age as me ( 24 ) and she's older than she told me.. she wasn't 40 but 48 lol...lol i don't care i mean she's still hot and funny.... but this weird vibe entered the room.. i told her i was 24 , but she had the thought of me being older..
She started talking about how we cannot have a relationship... i just felt this was a one time thing, i at least want a fuckbuddy...i told her im open minded and im ok with everything.. i can control my emotions and im smart enough to take descisions ... why the fuck does she talk about this shit - we already talked aobut it - it just felt like a huge shit test. she told me we cannot control out feelings if we meet too much....
she brought up this shit 4 times... i told her she should keep her mouth shut.. it's our secret and nobody else has to know I just sensed she's afraid of getting attached.... We started wrestling in the middle of the room.. ended up kissing... She kissed me alot - like im her boyfriend or something - constantly holding me, calling me sweet and cute. me myself didn't care at all.. im ok with everything to be honest. I told her it's a shame if we not meet up again because we are so good in bed etc yada yada...
told her to not tell her children or anyone elseabout us, keeping shit discrete... told her i actually really like her and she turns me on.. she's saying vice versa...
she drove me back to the bus/trainstation , again it was pleasant , just checking the scenery.. autumn is setting in and it really cemented the moment, i didn't even felt a slight hangover. She stopped the car .. we kissed .. looked at eachother.. she holds my hand and i left.. some waving... She didn't look happy when i walked away , just this facial expression gave me these particular vibes.
i was just in bliss.. sitting on bench waiting on my trainride.. she texted me she really enjoyed us and we will speak soon... i sent something similar back. i wasn't thinking about losing her or getting back together again.. it was romantic i just decided to keep this experience intact by not judging it... I never would have guess that a useless fuck would turn out all this romantic, on the other hand i really know she's afraid of getting attached and going all romantic is a way to lose a fuckbuddy...But on the other hand it made it so more valuable en a noteworthy experience...
we both had trouble keeping hands off eachother... i just feel we both think about having somekind of relationship.. we both struggled with the whole idea.. Im not focussed on having a relationship with her but i just really like the whole overall experience. i have been kissing , fucking, talking to ALOT of woman but i never felt this kind of intimacy before - this kind of energy.
Now as im typing this i just feel this buzz... sitting in my chair thinking back, enjoying the experience.. leaving it for what it really is. I Still haven't showered .. my clothes still smell like sex , cinnamon, apples and eucalyptus...i like the smell of the experience lingering on me.
CHAT
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