Today I spent the day over-coming approach anxiety. I've found 60 years of challenge's social momentum phylosophy most helpful. I was asking where to buy perfume and which they could recommend for my sister, then panicing, saying "thank you" and walking off because it felt too wierd starting any other type of conversation, not least because nearly every girl seemed too eager to walk away as quickly as possible themselves. Finally i stopped a girl who was very calm, helpful, seemingly content to chat, so i thought i'd try transitioning to a normal conversation. I said, "so what do you do with yourself when you're not giving perfume advice" and she looked confused and said "what?" i repeated, and she just looked at me as if to say what a stupid question and replied "i work". i just said, "thank you" and walked away (funnily enough in the opposite direction as where she said the perfume shop was lol).

So no i said fuck this boring opener, and attempted an opener i've always liked to use online but never had the balls to do in person. "DO YOU THINK I LOOK GAY IN THIS SHIRT?" I opened one girl and she gave the response i'd been hoping for, laughing and smiling, but i didnt know how to follow up so i not so smoothly asked if she was on facebook and she said no and that was that. Then i approached 2 girls, one of which was just my type, that i'd never have the balls to speak to usually, and they both laughed, but looked at me more like they were laughing AT ME rather than the story, but i still felt good by the fact i'd actually done it and got some type of positive response.

Anyway, opening is not so much of a problem for me now, i'm just completely lost as to where to go immediately after. normal conversation seems like too much of a leap, especially in the gay opener. I've read some stuff about things you can do, but at this point i need a word by word follow up routine, observation, question, anything, so long as it's simple and doesnt leave me struggling.

Anticipating your help!

i know how u feel man, im in a similar position to you so looking forward to seeing what good advice people got

only thing id say is hang in there, when u know even if u do open its probs not going to lead anywhere cos your not that experienced, it can seem deflating and think "whats the point then" etc, but every "guru" has been at this point, we just gotta keep in there i guess, its a learning curve

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I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

i feel like i've over-come a major stumbling block. i mean, if you cant open, you cant do shit. i can open, so i can potentially do shit. i forgot to mention that one girl i asked where to get perfume was from out of town and looking to kill time before she met her friend. we had an interesting conversation and she didnt mind me hanging around. she went in a phone shop and the sales assistant wanted to talk to her about contracts so it would've been too wierd to hang around. it wasnt going anywhere anyway, but was a nice experience.