Ahhh, the festival, I can't say which one for the love of anonimity on this forum but it is a very important one in my city which involves much drinking and revelry from almost every person in the city over 21 and under 30. I enter at the north side, dressed, to the best of my ability, as an abercrombie and fitch model, because that is how I proverbially roll.

-Freshly bought AF colared t-shirt with one side of the colar popped. The same side which I like to cock my head just slightly.
-Tibetan necklace which accents the color of my eyes, blue.
-Faded jeans
-Brown belt
-And gold and brown shades which show my eyes through them a little.

All around drunk college age people drinking and partying, as people on the street sell carnival snack food and arts and crafts. It's a beautiful day and there's a ton of people out, many of them beautiful girls.

I don't usually go to a place alone with the sole intention of picking up a girl but that's exactly what I was doing today. I'm getting good at just throwing a random comment out there that hooks, instead of having an opener. I come up behind 2 girls and 1 guy by an SPAM. I'm with two of my male friends.

One of the girls looks back at my, I smile and tip my sunglasses, she smiles back, I say "hey", she returns the favor. Now the guy turns around, time for a neg. "You get stuck paying for this girl today?" I say to the guy. "Yeah, well her" he says, motioning to the girl I'm not talking to. I could have gone forward with this whole thing but I just decided to let the conversaiton trail off because I was just warming up.

I keep up the walking for a couple minutes. Making random comments, basically, tyring to get a hook but mostly unsuccessful because people are in situations that don't allow them a lot of idol time. I break off from my two friends and go solo for a bit, that's when I see my target, a tall brunette by herself with a very hippy style. Purple shirt and tie dye skirt, with some other weird colors mixed in. She's walking in the opposite direction and we never make eye contact.

I wait 5 seconds then turn around, keeping a safe distance behind. You could call this stalking if you want but I call it strategizing. I follow for about 10 minutes, I'm going to get cold feet if I don't say or do something. Finally, she turns down another street where there's some outhouses and a band. I thought she was going to go to the bathroom, I kinda had to go too so I turn down. Maybe I'm just justifying keeping following her but I see her turn around and come back towards me. Gotta make a move now.

"They closed over there?", that's really the best I could come up with after I was thinking all this stuff up in my head, haha

"Yeah, I was going to check out that band but they ended." she says, I observe her pace slows down, that invisible rubber band that keeps people on the course they are going down is weakening on her.

"What band is playing?" I say, the rubber band snaps, she's standing still slightly behind me, I turn my body to face her.

"Oh, its( I don't recall)...." she says

I eventually reveal I was just trying to go to the bathroom.

She says, "gee, actually you could just go to my friends place, its right down the road." wow, I'm thinking windfall

"Well, since you said the bathrooms are all closed I guess I'll just walk with you to your friend's place" funny thing is she never actually said that, but she rolls with it anyway.

I get to her friend's place and do my thing, then I come back out, she's with some dorky looking guy who's her nephew or something and three little kids. the kids want to know who I am, I tell them I'm the toothfairy.

Then the guy asks how I know her, I tell him we know eachother from highschool and haven't met in a real long time and that its great to get back together again. I continue with this the whole time we are together, which she finds hilarious.

Well, I find some things out about her. She wants to take the three kids to go in the bounce house at the festival, so I have to come along with them. Now I'm feeling like the fifth wheel here and the kids are not really taking that kindly to me.

I work on getting a better relationship so they don't sabotage me but honestly I feel like I've turned into a babysitter now. They want me to buy them italian ice which I do. I've established that the girl I am dealing with is a smart, honest type and therefore if I do something for her she'll feel obligated to repay me. I'm hoping in numbers, she wants to make it in fudge. i thank her for making me fat, then get her to buy it.

She tells me she goes to the beach a lot so I use that as an excuse to create a hypothetical future for our relationship. I say "we should go to the beach sometime"

"sure" she says

"so we'll exchange numbers and I can meet you there"

but then her friend or whoever the hell he is says something and I put my phone away. I don't want other people in this possi to know I'm getting their beloved friend's number, after all, I'm an old highschool friend.

finally, I get it from her when we make it further down the street. that guy keeps coming in and saying something to her at the most inopportune times. More idol chit chat then we keep going. This conversation is going nowhere with all these little kids around so I decide to split. I tell her I need to meet my friends and get ready to go, I got what I wanted out of it anyway.

"Alright, it was nice talking to you, goodbye purple" I say, drawing attention to the color of her attire. Then I leave.

The rest of the day I have fun telling random people on the street I am packing fudge and holding up the little white bag of fudge that she bought me. The girls in the city are not my type for the most part. To be good with the women all you need is big muscles, lots of tattoos, and no brain. I'm not that type of guy. I was glad to have met her though. I talk to a bunch of girls but they can't respect a guy who wears decent clothes and talks with some wit. I would like to go outside my "type" eventually, but for now, this is good.


So, questions I pose to the community.

-How do you deal with people a lot older or younger than who you are dealing with? parents, kids, cousins, whatever?

-How do you attract really shallow girls?

-How do you convince a group of people to let you, as an individual, join their group in a public setting? Not like, game one of the girls in the group, but just turn them into your posse.

_________________
--Johannes

"My notion of a wife at 40 is that a man should be able to change her, like a bank note, for two twenties." Warren Beatty