Ok i'm new here and have been reading these forums for a few days now and decided to sign up as I really want to get into game. Well i'm completely AFC, i'll let you all know that from the start even though it will doubtless be obvious. I was out last night for a friends birthday and made my first approach pretty much ever. That may sound terrible, but all the relationships i've had before have come from friendships, i've NEVER approached a girl in the open as it were, i've simply never needed to. I have had long relationships and so being single puts me in the position where I need to start making approaches. Well here is what happened last night...

I'm out with my friends and we decide to move to a pub with fairly cheap drinks and absolutely no SPAM. The group consists of a couple of girls and 4 guys, I know two of the guys and the others are new, but I connect with and become pretty popular with most of them, making them laugh n the like, a recipe for a good night.

Well we head to this pub and after a while I notice a new barmaid, this girl is probably a HB9, maybe not to most but she was my type, natural beauty, petite, in all counts gorgeous. I had been served by her quite a few times and when away from the bar I noticed a few looks and her talking to her barmaid friend. I'm thinking to myself(perhaps delusionally) that she is talking about me. I decide when I get my next drink i'm going to take the plunge and try direct pick-up. I head to the bar and wait to be served, but it's not by her, it's by the other one and so I order my drink and decide to wait until she passes by and be as direct as possible. Now I know this isnt really the best way to go about it but it's all trial and error guys and I have NEVER approached a girl before, so it took a lot of balls for me to just go for it, shrug off the AA and try, what's the harm.

She passes by and I go for it...

Me"Hi I just want to say you're absolutely gorgeous, could I get your number" - AFC and too direct I know but all new to me and just wanted to see if ballsy could work, it didnt.
Her"I cant, im sorry" - she gives a bit of a mock sad face, I carry on regardless.

Now I carry on and we have a chat about what she does, I feign interest and she seems to be going along with it. She asks what I do, is this an IOI or politeness? I tell her and we chat a bit more, she seems to be keeping the flow of the conversation going, she turns out to be an actress and seems to be enjoying the conversation, asking if I know the programmes she's been in. Convo comes to a close and I leave to re-join my friends.

I go to the bar a few more times and we dont talk but there are three other barmaids now, yet she is the one to serve me, she comes over and says "Vodka coke right?" with a smile on her face. She's remembered my drink and I expect could have easily asked her other colleagues to serve me if I had creeped her out.

Nothing else happened after this as I had lost my nerve, but I feel she would have asked her colleagues to serve me if she wasn't up to it, or she would have had a quiet word and said "god that guy asked my number" and her friends would have taken over at the bar everytime they saw me right to save her from that guy? What do you guys think?

1. Was she giving IOI's asking about what I do?
2. How would you have approached it, bearing in mind she was at work?

Any help would be great guys, I know you might all be shaking your heads or evening laughing haha, good on ya because it was fairly bad, indirect might be my next option. Any feedback will be good, but constructive criticism wherever possible, I already know SOME of my faults.

I know it's not possible, but I'd love to hear HOW you said that opening line. Maybe you could describe it? Was it said with utter nonchalance? Was there anxiety in your voice? Was it very confident?

Depending on that you may be able to track your conversation back to the number the next time you go in. Try, instead perhaps, the next time she brings you your drink and you've had a little conversation, you hand her a pad and pen and tell her to write her email down.

Hey tal0n, thanks for the reply, I would probably describe the way I said it as pretty ballsy to be honest, I waited for her to pass, and came out with it, I had a smile on my face prior to and during the delivery of the line. She smiled, almost blushing, but not in a way I would see as an IOI, more like "ah that's nice of you to say if random".

Following that I played it cool, i'm sure she's used to guys saying it as she was stunning and so possibly appreciatted I didnt just wither away following the initial rejection.

The thing is, hours after saying the line I realised that there was a MUCH better way I could have said it, obviously after building some rapport. I am never going back to the bar again as it's very far out of the way, and so a brilliant way would have been to mention that fact and say it's her one and only chance in a CF kinda way

"So, i'm leaving soon and wont be back here again but it would be great if we could continue this in another setting" or something similar. The benefit of hindsight eh!?