We met for drinks (man, this older woman likes her booze) and she was venting about work, blah blah blah. Then she discussed her philosophy of dating (something about dating lots of guys for fun and other guys who had long term potential, sounded like the girl had GAME).

I beat her at darts, because as tipsy as I get after a couple beers, I was still throwing bulls eyes (just a gift, I haven't played in a long time).

She agrees to come back to my place, and we sit/recline on the love seat, and watch the end of the baseball game (she said she wanted to). I think she was ticked I didn't have any booze at my house (I don't drink at home), so we just relaxed in each others arms.

So, I didn't escalate or even try. The after effects of gaming after a day of work and a couple of beers. After about an hour I was feeling more alert and was ready to escalate (I was touching and we were holding already), and she blew me off. "Gettin' late gotta go blah blah blah."

I got a few AFC kisses before she left. I suspect that's our last date. I kind of like her, but her body is average (nice face), she drinks too much, smokes, and is mega-busy. That's fine if she wants to be a FB (fuck buddy), but that's not her style (I think).

I could have escalated when we got back to my place, it may have been what she wanted. But, as PUAs know, drinking and game do not go together. I don't drink much, but this woman does. So I didn't want to have sex until the beer wore off after about an hour, and by then the window was closed.

Man, when you are running game, the clock is ticking. It's like, you have got to keep the pace moving. Seems I had a window of maybe 30 minutes to escalate, then she turned off. Thing is, I didn't want to. It was my choice. For whatever reason. Now, had she turned around at some point while she was in my arms and shown a desire to kiss, sure, I would have done my thing. But she never showed any sign of interest beyond just being there and in my arms.

I think I may have a sticking point here. This is the second one in a row where I've gotten them alone, we are in each others arms, and they don't want to make out. I must be triggering some resistance in their minds, or not enough attraction. Maybe too much comfort and not enough attraction or arousal?

Any suggestions welcome!

This is not bullshit.

No one replied to my AFC report above. That's OK.

So, having gotten what i thought were a couple of IOD's from this woman, I figured I had nothing to lose by asking her, directly, basically, what she thought of me. She asked if i was ready for it, and i said sure, WTF.

She says that I didn't seem to know what I was doing on our dates, and, later it came out that she thought i was extremely reserved and she had no idea i liked her and was somewhat hot for her.

So i filled in some details, complete with true sexual exploits since my separation and divorce (DHV), and, although she did pick up on my reserved nature (usually a DHV, shows restraint and class), she didn't know I was also a passionate man.

This part I'm still thinking about: so she essentially admits she likes me plenty so far, does want to go out again, wants me to take the lead, and, completely shocking to me, asked me to pick out her dress for the evening (pink skirt/tight top). I'll drive her car from her house so she can drink (I can't hold my alcohol and I want her feeling good).

Looks like the game is back on with the assistance of a direct and honest woman. Funny, I didn't think I was that reserved, I thought i was obvious and lame. I think she took my failure to escalate on the couch (see above) as an IOD herself.

I tell you, I'm more shy than I thought I was. I'm also more confused than ever. I guess that's what PUA training is all about--peacocking and material and confidence and body language. It's about thrusting yourself out there in a way which demonstrates without question that you are an interesting, virile man. The adventure continues....lol.

Something that someone told me recently has really stuck in my head and changed the way I looked at things. (actually, it made me go.. WTF WAS I THINKING! a thousand times.)

He said "If she is talking with you after 10 minutes than she is already attracted to you." No need to wonder, no need to question yourself, no need for any of that crap. You KNOW that you are a possibility for a mate.

This made me look back on hundreds of times when I had to "Check" and see if she was attracted to me or use a SOI (statement of intent.)

So, man, if she was willing to talk to you again then she was very interested in you and YOU need to show her that you are interested in her. Not TELL her. SHOW her. Make sure you up the Kino, lead her around the room. Be a bit more forceful, she will enjoy it or she will tell you that your being bossy with body language (You know the "WTF" face.)

In fact, that "Pick out my dress" thing is very interesting. I had a F-buddy who reaaaaaallly enjoyed when I "Manned Up". I told her what I wanted her to wear, I corrected her, I even moved her to where I wanted her to go (Stopped her from sitting down and pulled out the other chair for her with a look of "your sitting here" type thing). She just ate it up and made her feel safe to be with a "real" man.

Anyway, look for other submissive signs from this woman and see if she enjoys being "controlled". Instead of asking where she would like to go say "We are going to Blah for dinner tonight, I really enjoy that place and I think you will too." Instead of waiting for her to sit in a chair, go behind one and pull it out to motion for her to SIT (you know the difference in a gentleman, a wussy, and a man who wants you to sit. Right?) Don't order her meal though! You probably don't know enough about her! (If you do, then this can earn you major points but can lose HUGE amounts). Anyway, you get the point.

EvoJ