Happy new years! We all know that on new years eve its basically mandatory to party, and even the socially inept hermit-like party-haters have to do
something; even if its mingling with other socially inept hermit-like party-haters. Celebrating the new year is a big thing for lots of people, so I thought it was a good idea to party.
I went to a decent party with about 50 people. I knew most of them, so there wasn't much opening to do with a few exceptions. And not many of the girls were extremely attractive unfortunately but one of my new years resolutions should probably be to be less picky. Anyway for the sake of being brief I'll get to the point here.
------KISSES------
This party took a huge dive with
one big mistake I made. But I'll get to that. Kissing in general became much less of a deal a couple months ago when I made out with a few girls at a party just for fun, and I realized how easy it is to do, what I was missing out on, and that it really isn't as big of a deal as I thought it was.
Kiss 1: New years came around and I held up the clock for the countdown. Felt pretty cool with all the people watching me and counting down on my lead. Anyway, that happened, everyone cheered and I think I saw every dude in the room look around, grab a girl, and start going down. I didn't but I didn't make too much of a deal out of it, I had to hold the clock. So we all went outside and partied and shot fireworks at each other and ran around and did backflips, me still unkissed. Then I went inside and there was this girl there kissing people for new years so I kissed her. I knew her pretty well and it was just a peck but it was still a new years kiss.
Kiss 2: Kept partying for a while. At about 1 I started talking to this girl from out of town, her name was Hope. She was only a 4 and she was kind of overweight but I'm not so shallow that I won't talk to unattractive girls. She started coming on to me and talking about how she had a new years kiss every year except this one, which was probably bullshit in retrospect but whatever. Recognizing the signals and with my newfound epiphany about kissing, I offered her a new years kiss. I think I made her night (she definitely wanted to keep kissing but I wasn't gonna make out with her).
Kiss 3: This one doesn't have such a big story. One of Hope's friends was in town, they were sitting down in the party so I went over to talk to them (total social butterfly of the night, I was all over the place). Her friend asked if I wanted a new years kiss so I said sure (she was also about the same attractiveness as Hope).
-----OPENER------
I only used one canned opener last night, just to try it out.
Went up to a group of 4 HB7's on a couch and some dude who looked gay:
Me: Can I ask you guys a serious question? I really need your opinion on something.
[This works wonders and whoever invented the opinion opener is a genius. Too bad it only works once on each girl or else you seem like you rely too much on opinions...]
Them: Sure!
Me: Okay... Here goes.... In a scale of 1-10, how gay do I look? Be honest.
HB7s: Haha, uhh thats a hard one.
Gay dude: Well, I'm gay so I'm pretty good at telling this. You don't look gay.
[I won't bore you with details, but we went on talking about that for a while. Apparently I don't look gay though, which I think is a good thing.]
Them: Why did you ask if you looked gay?
Me: Well, whenever I see a gay guy or meet some gay dude, they always seem to hit on me. I have no problem with gay people blah blah blah but I thought maybe I look gay to them...
Them: Gay people are attracted to guys with a good sense of style and who are attractive. If anything that means it is a compliment to you and your fashion sense, so don't worry about it.
HB7s: And its not only gay people, cause me and my friends think you're pretty hot. So, don't just think its gay people.
I had these girls on a string. They were getting really close to me on the couch and one of the girls kept talking about how
she really wanted to kiss somebody. I took this as an IOI... and I would have kiss closed but she went on to say that she has mono so she has to kiss someone who has either had mono or has mono. At least she was honest... I think.
-----BIG MISTAKE-----
I made a huge mistake last night that practically ruined my whole new years. I still feel bad about it (I'm not sure I should, though). There was this girl I talked about in my last field report [
i-almost-got-laid-could-have-got-laid-v ... highlight=] and she was there last night. I knew she was gonna be there, and
I was pretty sure I was going to at least hook up with her if not fuck her last night. She recently split with her boyfriend who is a buddy of mine and a real good guy. Either way if she was single I was definitely going to hook up with her.
I was talking to her last night and she was all over me again, then one time when I was talking to her she just leaned in and kissed me. I didn't think too much of it, I thought just another new years kiss, no big deal. Then later on I was talking to her and she started making out with me. I went along with it.
We were making out for about a minute, on and off, she kept talking too, saying I was a good kisser and we have to hang out and stuff, tons of IOIs and all that. Then
all of a sudden I heard some yelling, serious yelling, loud yelling, and I felt a hand grab my shirt and throw me back really hard. I definitely didn't see that coming and I was a bit shocked. It was another friend of mine, well kind of a friend, we'll call him Rob. He was yelling at me for a second, telling me to sit down, asking what the fuck I was doing, stuff like that.
I had no idea what was going on.
This girl I was making out with came up to me and started apologizing and telling me not to be mad at her. Then it hit me; I asked her if she got back together with her ex boyfriend and she said yes she did. God what a mistake that was. I felt like shit. She kept saying it wasn't my fault and then my buddy who was yelling said they're leaving right now, and he walked out with her. Boy did I really feel like shit.
All my friends were reassuring me saying that it wasn't my fault cause she didn't tell me they were back together. Then she came back in crying a couple hours later and saying that
her and her boyfriend broke up cause we kissed, so I felt like shit. I didn't know what to say to her though, I'm really not good with drama. I just like to have a good time with no extra emotional strings attached to it. I was hoping I could just hook up and go home but that apparently couldn't happen.
So we left at 4 in the morning as the party died and my ride sobered up, passed out in my bed, and here I am. I've gotta start making some new years resolutions...
-----WHAT I LEARNED-----
I try to learn something from every night out and every opportunity. Here's what I learned last night:
1. Be sure about who you're kissing. I mean this situation is really rare, usually a girl won't be makking with you if shes dating someone but you can never be too careful. Especially if you don't know the chick and you are at some bar or something. Don't be petrified to kiss some girl cause she might be dating some guy, cause its unlikely, but be careful.
2. Don't let a situation that is out of your control ruin your night. I totally regret letting what happened ruin my night. It was out of my control, for one thing, and also it really wasn't my fault. At all. Sure it takes two to kiss, but I had no idea that they were dating, and if I did I definitely wouldn't have done it. Girlfriend stealing isn't part of my arsenal. If I could go back and change one thing after the mistake it would be to enjoy the rest of the night despite what happened.
3. Don't be afraid to escalate, because it really isn't as big a deal as your mind tells you it is. This I learned really over the last couple months, but it really came into focus last night. Kissing is not a big deal. (Unless the girl is dating someone...) But apart from that, kissing someone is okay. Don't let your mind tell you otherwise.
4. Put out a good vibe. This is exactly what has been said before on this site in articles and things I've read. Put out a good vibe and people will feel it. People will reverberate their own good vibes back to you. Your vibe is subconscious but it can be felt throughout the whole room. A good vibe is genuine and can't be faked, but the old saying applies here too: fake it till you make it. Fake a good vibe and eventually a good vibe will be generated. But this can't be done if you are caught up in drama like I was, or if you let small things like kissing scare you or intimidate you. Don't be afraid of what you are capable of.
Happy new years!
CHAT
I think that it isn't your fault girl shouldn't have let you to kiss her