| So, i've been absent on the forums for quite some time. This is because I went to Thailand, with two good friends of mine. Now basically this was gonna be a little boot camp for me to get over AA. Thankfully people on holiday are lot more easier to approach, because the opener, is really easy. Where are you from? Well, not really that direct but that's the gist of it really. I found that after the first couple of nights I didn't really crash and burn, but I honed the skill to not expect anything from opening the set. I had put it in the mindset that I just wanted to say hello and introduce my self to people, find out where they were from, and why they were here. Upon doing this i found that I became transparent, and less obvious to the targets that I was trying to pick them up, and I genuinely wanted to hear there story. It's one of many positives that I take back from my trip, was that I come across as genuine.
Being honest with them... best thing ever. Don't use lies... i know the phrase "it's not lying, it's flirting", can work but when you asked a question, and you slip it's not a cool place to be, and very hard to recover your frame, because you instantly don't become the prize, and you seek approval.
This had happened to me while I was on the trip, on my first night out, with my mate Southern Cross. I told him I was gonna use an alias, and try use a fake persona, like I was a DJ back in my home town, etc. I opened a set. I walked passed... glanced over my shoulder... and asked... What are you drinking? (lame, yes. Simple, yes. Effective, oh yeah). They replied with, bacardi and coke. They had a German accent. I nodded, took one step away, and said, "omg i love your accent... where are you from". The two targets replied, "austria".
Villain: Wow (rocking back)... Can I try guess your names?
Set: Sure
Villain: Helga & Inga...
Set: Hahaha... no, it's nina... and agnieska...
Villain: Nina, and....
Set: Agnieska!
Villain: Fuck that, too hard to pronounce, i'm a call you helga
Helga: You can call me theresa... *smiling*
Villain: Ok, Helga it is... So, how long have you two been on the island...
Now it went on from fluffing them at this point...
But i tried my DHV story about, how i was a DJ back home. It went something like:
Villain: So back home I DJ for a club... if you two were ever in australia, you should come by.
***sticking point***
They saw right through that story. It must've been written all over my face. At this point the set politefully exited the building. If i'm going to do that line again, i've got to work on my body language, and delivery. None the less, didn't feel comfortable lying.
Now, my next night out, I tried doing the genuine approach, and used embarrassing stories from my child hood. I opened a set again with... the what are you drinking, where are you from....
Set: We're from england..
Villain: I bet you couldn't guess where i'm from (whacking on a American Accent)
Set: America
Villain: (quickly dropping the american accent) No, i'm from australia.
Set: Haha... that's so cool.. that accent sounded so genuine
Villain: I'm culturally confused, i'm part asian, part spanish, part greek, and i'm australian.... I have no idea what I am some mornings...
Set: Haha... (alice) I'm half japanese half english...
Villain: Shit... i owe my mate a drink because i put a bet on, that you were an eskimo...
Alice: Haha...
I transitioned to a DHV story, when i smelt the target's perfume...
Charlie: what are you doing...?
Villain: Don't worry it's not you i'm interested in, it's your perfume...
Charlie: *weird look*
Villain: What, is that you're wearing?
Charlie: CKin2U.
Villain: Do you think that would be good as a present for a 13 yr old?
(i posted this up as an opener, i've found it more better to use as a DHV story)
Charlie: I think so... why?
Villain: My neice, she turns 13 later this year, and she's been complaining that nobody treats her like a lady, and that everyone treats her like a kid still. So if i get that perfume for her, do you think that would put me into the "cool" (placing hand on chest, NLP trick) uncle category?
Charlie: OMG yes... i wish that I had an uncle like you.
Villain: haha... easy tiger. You're going to get in line, or marry into my family. Wait, i've got a degenrate uncle that i could set you up with...
Charlie: Oh, is he rich?
Villain: Of course..... NOT. Geez, i wouldn't have picked you for home wrecker... he's still married though.
Charlie: oops... haha
Villain: You are clearly not cool (placing hand on chest once again)... I was gonna say sexy (hand on chest), funny (NLP), but you're clearly not...
From here she kept trying to impress me... i email closed her. It's the closest thing to a number seeing as we are on holiday. However, I've now stumbled across my latest Sticking point. I can't escalate... I CAN NOT ESCALATE FOR THE LIFE OF ME. I have not kiss closed since i've been working on my game. It's been nearly 5 months, since someone elses tongue has been down my throat. I'm not sure what subconscious thing that has been holding me back?!
This incident has isolated this for me. I was walking along the beach, just after breakfast, with this hb 8.5; Before we were walking, when i opened her, i managed to find out that she is in thailand, because she had just broken up with her ex, only to find out he came out of the closet, and that was the reason for breaking up with her. Now, she's obviously shattered; On the beach, she was saying:
HB: You know, it's been 4 months since i last kissed a guy...
Villain: *bemused look*
HB: Yeh, i know... and i haven't had a fling with anyone since i've been single
Villain: and why is that?
HB: Don't get me wrong, i just don't wanna go out there and hook up with random dudes. I mean, just because i'm single and all, doesn't mean i should.
Villain: So what do you plan to do when you're single?
HB: to find myself...
Villain: So in order to find yourself, you're not going to take a risk by sharing an intimate moment...
(at this point, i had grabbed her hand, she squeezed back)
HB: No, i just don't think i'm ready...
Villain: and how will you know when you are?
HB: I don't know
(She had the puppy dog look in her eyes, at this point)
HB: excuse me... (stopping a passer by) Can you take our photo.
Random: Sure
Photo was taken... we looked at the photo, she looked at me, puppy dog look and all... and... I CHOKED!!! I fucken choked... i said to her, your eyes, are fantastic... pity they're contacts. Talk about a moment killer.
What i wanted to say, was mystery's line: Do you want to kiss me?
But i didn't...
I DON'T know why...
Can you guys maybe explain why i choked, when the signals were all there?! It's really eating me up inside, because i hate missing oportunities, i that feeling you get, when you wonder... WHAT IF?!
So that was my trip... alotta positives, i feel like i've broken down my behavior during my openers, i think i just need to move on to the next step.... what ever that, may be. Please help guys...
_________________
Experience is the teacher of all things - Julius Caesar
|
CHAT
