Being in LTR’s for over 15 years, now single and trying to overcome the AFC stage. Doing walk ups is very hard. Always end up talking myself out of it.

What do you think of this? Had a foot operatin on Friday and went to a mates BBQ on sat. While there, a mate came along with a girl he’s friends with (a 10 out of 10). This mate is the one who put me on to RJ. Anyway he already has a girlfriend and has just been going for days out with her. A few times in the past he’s kicked off on me for talking to girls he has had his eye on. How childish is that? (I didn’t know you can put ‘reserved’ tags on women????)

Classic AFC reaction on his part?

He has tagged along to one of our nightouts with this girl two months ago and I ended up talking to her for two hours, I ran a few patterns on her. She had just split with a boyfriend a few days before and said it was still ‘raw’. She promised to invite me to her flat warming party (she would notify me via my mate-fat chance he would let me know about that!!)

At the BBQ I was talking to her for a long time. During which my mate made no attempt to sit near her, the body language was one of ‘acquaintances’ – i.e. sat nowhere near each other and very little conversation between the two-no rapport.

I said ‘are you still up for that coffee?’

she said ‘yes’

so I passed her my phone and said put your number in it. She did. She phoned me the next afternoon and we went for a coffee.

It’s obvious my mate (who wants his cake and eat it) has not made his intentions known to her and will remain in the ‘friend zone’.

After 30mins while having the coffee, I made my intention known to her, kept compliments to minimum.got lots of kino (touching the small of her back, friendly hand on the knee during conversation, arm around her under her umbrella )and then took her for a walk by the beach. She had no objections to my arm being around her but when I went for the k-close she said ‘I cant as I haven’t broken up with my boyfriend properly yet, I need to speak to him’ she at first offerd he lips with teeth firmly together.then used the 'i cant do this'....

was that LMR and I failed to over come it?

in the car on the way home, I tried the hard sell about how short life is, should be with someone you can look up to etc’ could really freeze her out like mystery suggests,,,,,,,,I would have had to walk 8 miles home !!!! I told how valuable time is and she owes it to herself to spend it with the right one.

To cut a long story short my mate who brought her to the bbq is saying to me other mate that he’s well pissed off with me now for ‘sharking in’ on her. He’s a AFC and already has a girlfriend and obviously wants to control who this other girl talks to !!! amazing.

He ranted aswell. ‘when we left the BBQ and drove home all she spoke about in the car was “Peter this and Peter that Peter, Peter, Peter” I’m still laughing as type this. Well thanks to his ranting he has infact boosted my confidence by giving me feedback. Priceless !!!!!

But there sounds to be contradictory signals in here reaction. Lots of interest then LMR. Maybe I fucked it up and jumped a few steps when going for the k-close. Suppose its all a learning curve.

Any tips or just opinions, brutha’s ?

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