My situation, Where I stand, next step?



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PostPosted: Mon Nov 03, 2008 6:25 am 
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Joined: Wed Dec 20, 2006 5:56 am
Posts: 33
Location: Tucson, Arizona
Hey guys! So here is a fairly detailed explanation of my situation...
I met a girl through a lady friend at a party that I threw with my roomies, at the time she had a boyfriend...

She turned out to be in one of my classes so she sits with me. She broke up with her boyfriend(of 4ish years) about 2 weeks ago. I have built up PLENTY of high value and I can tell that she at least likes me. I have done all of the qualifying and we have much common interests. I can keep her laughing and distracted from taking notes every time we are in class lol

I expressed interest slightly, i.e. she talked about how she was "old fashioned" I said she should be taking me on dates, driving me around, etc...

I have gotten coffee with her after class and most recently I had a lady friend "talk me up" at our Halloween party which may have expressed too much interest (and ruined my stealth approach haha) because she got out of her "He is a really cool guy but I am not sure if I am ready for a bf" the drunk noobie pivot asked something like "where do you guys stand?"

The same night I had another girl help me "make her jealous" and she said she thought it worked because the target was bitchy to her after.

To sum it up:
She likes me
Recent breakup
She now knows I am interested
I need to make a move
She knows I have other options

My question is.... Know that she knows I like her (2 days ago), which approach would you advise I go about?

I have class with her Thursday and the best thing I can think of is to go off on some sort of tangent then say:

"So what is your schedule like this week, you need to take me on a date."

Would it be a good idea to disarm her resistance by first saying something like:
"This semester is so hectic, I don't know how I was able to handle a serious relationship with a full load last semester, I definitely do not want to jump into anything like that now."

I think that could sort of disarm her but not leave out casual dating from the picture. Good idea?

Would that be the best route or can you suggest another?

What do you think about this strategy? Should I just switch over and be more direct about asking her out? -or- Should I just keep it indirect, give it a little bit more time and keep building attraction/comfort then kiss close and build upon eventually?

She is pretty and an engineering major so she gets approached often I am sure and is used to chuddy engineering guys falling for her immediately but I am sure she also gets the guys that never progress things to the next step.

That is all the info on where I am at, with what I have given you what is the best advice you can give me in regards to my next step???

If it doesn't go anywhere I won't be all that disappointed because I have many options right now. She is just the most qualified so If there is a way to make it work from this situation (have you been in a similar one?) that would be sweet!

Thanks for reading and your help!


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PostPosted: Mon Nov 03, 2008 6:01 pm 
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Joined: Tue Oct 28, 2008 6:35 pm
Posts: 17
I think the direct approach is good here. If you're sitting in class together all the time, and she's coming over to sit next to you, it's a really solid IOI. Sure she's not ready for a relationship, but if you aren't either, then it sounds like she'd go along for the ride. Ask her to a small social gathering - maybe one where she doesn't know a lot of people (makes her dependent on your kindness) and treat her right the whole night, introduce her to your friends and kino escalate, kino escalate, kino escalate. Sounds like you like this girl, so make sure she knows you're in no rush to bed her with some disqualifiers like the one you mentioned.


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