Hey guys! In case I get miserable as fuck for not following this trend, I decided to start recording all of my daily approaches and what I learned from them, and how I can improve upon it next time. I'll start over the past few days.

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Yesterday, I went on a date with a 26 year old that I number closed last week(I'm only 19 btw). I wouldn't say I BOMBED it, but it definitely didn't go anywhere. I think my main problem was that me and her weren't really on the same wavelength. I have a really interesting lifestyle and hobbies compared to her, yet she's more mature than me, so in my mind that's kind of fucked up in a way, and I know I felt that, she might have too. I asked her if she's going to school, saving up for a house etc. She's just working right now, but it seemed like she was putting off shit. But I think more of the error was on my part. She was more chill and classy, while I was "trying" (I need to stop trying period) to be high energy and vibrant, and it seemed really forced. I'm sure she detected it. At one point she called my life boring because I don't go out to clubs and all that shit, but I sarcastically told her to bite me and that my life is awesome. I tried to get her to kiss me on the cheek near the end of the date, but she refused. I sent her a text saying we should hang again, even though I know for a fact that not even "I" want to. It was just too weird. I've always known that I'm the type of guy that likes meaningful relationships anyways, with a strong emotional connection, compared to just fucking every hot girl I see. There's no way I can have an orgasm with a girl I don't have feelings for, that's just how I am, and I'm not sorry for it.

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Today, I had a hard time getting out of bed because I just felt like such shit from that date last night. I don't regret what happened now, but this morning was just fucking awful, because I realized that all of the connections I've made with girls of the past month were basically gone. My abundance with all of the women I knew was effectively set back to 0. But then before I got out of bed I realized that I've been in this situation before. And because I earned that date, I earned meeting all those girls, I could easily earn it again. I will continue with this, and my victory will happen. One day. It might not be this week. But it will one day, and I don't care if its a decade from now. But I want to learn to be naturally social and WANT to be social for the next week, so I will not dedicate any time SPECIFICALLY for sarging. Because I think it would just be a waste of time, I want to invest a little bit more into myself first.

I decided to hike my ass to the gym for chest day, because no day is more important than that. I decided against any type of actual sarging; I just wanted to be social. One lady I say hi to there (just friends) there looked back at me when I was walking behind her, and we both greeted and talked. I asked her if she's going on the stairs, because she's ALWAYS on the stairs, and we both laughed at that. We then talked about different classes she does there, but I eventually cut the conversation short because I wanted to get my workout started. I think it was cool that I've made another friend there instead of just saying "hi" all the time.

After a decent workout, I wanted to go to a local store to buy a shirt that I knew would match one pair of shorts I bought last year, before when I had fuck all for clothing sense. On the way there, I wanted to be social. The first girl I saw was sitting on a bench texting. The mall was nearly empty, so naturally, she looked at me. A second after, it just felt right to ask her, 'What time does the mall open?" (I knew it opened in 10 minutes). She told me 9:30, and I said 'good, because there's this shirt I want to buy at bluenotes!' she giggled and laughed. I dont know if she found me attractive or not at that time, but I found that after any workout, I have a certain vibrance to me, and I just feel and look brighter. I didn't think of it at the time, but I definitely could have continued with an opened after that and said, "Well I got nothing to do for the next 8 minutes, let's chat." I didn't, but I'll know for next time.

On the way out of the mall, I happened to look at the hallmark store. Holy fuck. It's mother's day tommorrow, I'd better hustle my ass inside and get me a card. In that card aisle there was an old lady, about 80, and a cute girl, around 18. I tactically decided to ask the old lady if she was getting anything for mother's day, because I needed ideas. (this could have either meant is she getting something from someone, or getting something for her 120 year old mom). She talked to me about how her grandchildren got her some pictures of their graduation, and that other window reflector things would make a great gift. During this pleasant chat, the cute girl laughed and walked past me while making eye contact and a smile. I HAD to approach her too, because everything was in place. I went up to her in a different aisle, and simply asked her what she was getting her mom for mother's day. She started talking about this crazy glass knot looking thing from the store opposite, and she was talking about how it strongly resembled a strong relationship and unity, stuff like that, stuff I'm not super experienced with. I called her out on the fact of how spiritual she was, and asked her if she goes to this yoga studio that I go to outside the mall. She didn't. This conversation basically ended here, I know I could have continued with talking about that studio, and eventually go right for the throat and say "Hey...you're cute. What's your name?" and probably get a #close. Either way, I happened to find a great gift as a reward for being social, and I'll remember a way to continue situational appraoches for next time!!!

When I walked into the gift shop she talked about, a girl there that I was joking around with about gifts last time I was there happened to be there, and we both remember each other. it was cool, because she showed me the gift I wanted to get her. We talkeda bout random shit such as what she's getting her mom for mother's day, blahblahblah. She said she liked customers like me, because I don't cause trouble for her and I'm not difficult. I rewarded her by saying I like her as a cashier, and we both laughed! Anyways, it didn't really go past that. I don't think it would have been a good idea to go past this, because I'm still inexperienced, and I still want to go to this store sometimes. But anyways, I don't regret what I did today, because I learned.

Today's Victories:

Broke out of a depressive episode.
Talked to some of the cutest girls I've seen so far.
Actually desired to be social instead of forcing it, for one of the first times.
Made a new friend at the gym, one who seems really social.
Used a good line on a cashier.


The future:
I'm going to the gym again tommorrow, and the grocery store with my mom for mother's day. We'll see what happens!

Thanks for reading everyone!

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Not much happened today. I started by going to the gym, and I met up with stair lady again. She made a joke saying that she hasn't left the stairs since I last saw her, and she asked my name. I didn't want to do pickup on her, because she's older than me and I'm just not really attracted to her. But some shit switch got flipped on in my brain, and told me to go into pickup mode, because HOLY FUCK, A WOMAN WANTS TO KNOW MY NAME, BETTER TRY AND GET HER NUMBER OR SOMETHING. I walked onto the stair thing next to her, AWKWARDLY, and shook her hand and we talked about my name, because people make fun of it sometimes (not in a way that bothers me, its funny). I asked her questions that I already asked the day before, and made myself look like a retard trying to ask questions simply for the sake of being not awkward, which in turn has the opposite effect.

I think what I'm starting to notice is that when I go into pickup mode, instead of social mode, it actually works against me. I was merely pretending to be interested in what she had to say, instead of getting to know special things about her. I made a mistake, and I understand why. Now I need to master it and learn to fix it.

I feel I redeemed myself when I walked up to her friend on the treadmill, and asked her if stair woman ever uses elevators or escalators. As expected, she jokingly said no, except for the escalator that is the only way out of the gym. Immediatly came to my head was "she uses the down escalator, the up escalator is too easy for her". Keep in mind that I was in "natural, social" mode. Not pickup mode. And I know for a fact that it left a much better impression. It's starting to make sense to me now, just stop trying. I need to show intent, all the while practicing how to enjoy it at the same time, otherwise it will feel unnatural, and me and the female will BOTH feel the awkwardness.

I also wore one of my classiest sets of clothing for mother's day lunch with my mom today. I notice that some days I look good while other days I look like shit; what it really comes down to is how you're FEELING. Have you ever noticed that after a successful pickup, you'll look in the mirror and say, Holy fuck, that guy is damn attractive. I was wearing high value clothing, and it made me feel good. What it comes down to is: If you feel good, you look good. Be social, have a good time, and you will appear attractive to yourself, and in turn, attractive to others.

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

What's up man.

I don't get on here too much but I saw a few of your FR's pop up on the dash and I identified with your date with the 26 year old. When I was 21 one of the first chicks I chased was a 27 year old. I was a virgin at the time and she was divorced. I was so out of my element!

I can tell you are still kinda fresh into PUA thing.

A big thing that stuck out to me was how you were talking about being in the "social mode" vs "pick up mode". I started to feel exactly the same way after awhile.

The more I've studied "pick up", the more I wish I could have switched my process of knowledge acquisition. Pick up got me into self improvement and psychology. Through self improvement I started taking a hard look at myself and examining my weak points and vulnerabilities, and taking responsibility for them.

Pick up can be an exciting new thing when your first discover it and can become your primary focus. If I could give some words of advice, try and prioritize self improvement over pick up. Invest more time in yourself and dedicate a small chunk to meeting new people and new chicks.

Shift some of your reading from the pick up techniques to books. I highly recommend Models by Mark Manson, and No More Mr. Nice Guy by Robert Glover.

I'm actually working on some content of my own. If you like some of the stuff I recommended let me know!

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Game doesn't exist.

Thanks a ton for the feedback Enso! It's totally going to fit into what I'm about to describe happened to me today..


So it's been almost a week since I've went out and did pickup, here's what I've been up to. I've spent most of that off time doing my usual shit, working, gym, yoga etc. I learned some new techniques, and more specifically I'm trying to get into what TylerRSD is doing. The fact that he is a dorky ginger and is able to kiss girls within 20 seconds just fucking befuddles me, and I wanted to experiment and see what its like. I also have been studying up on the simplified principles made by Chris Bale, such as being present and, through different body language, showing the girl your alphaness. One of my proudest accomplishments though, is buying a ticket for an EDM music festival near my town. Let me tell you, a year ago I would never have seen myself doing this shit. Hell, not even a few weeks ago, even. Ever since I turned 19, I've barely even touched the night scene; I went to a nightclub ONCE, and almost bugged out. I didn't talk to any girls there, or at least tried to, but the music was too loud and I was too drunk. Do I regret going? FUCK. NO. Will I regret going to this EDM festival? If I just have fun, be present, and get to see my favourite DJ of all time..I think it's going to be even better. Besides, it gave me a new opener for me to use. Anyways, onto TODAY.


So I wanted to get this done quickly and clean, because the only time I'm ever in a place with any volume of girls is when I go to the mall, and I wanted to get my shoulder workout in the gym done before it got too busy. I didn't want to do direct openers anymore, and instead wanted to show my interest simply through body language and looking her right in the fucking eyes, with my soft, toned manly voice. My planned opener was:

"Hey..can you help me out for a second? I'm looking for some shutter shades...have you ever heard of them?..No?...here's a picture of Kanye West wearing them...really? I should go there?...Thanks..I'm going to this EDM festival, and I want to complete my costume..You're pretty cute..What's your name?.."

I walked around the mall for about 2 minutes, looking for a good opportunity to start. I walked up to one girl who looked cute from behind. When she turned around, she looked about 15 years older than me, and I just felt a weird feeling in my stomach. It must have shown on my face, because she walked off before I could even finish what I was saying, and acted like I didn't even exist. I admit, I felt kinda shit, and wanted to quit right there. I think this kind of rejection is even worse than a flat out "no". But It's good I got exposed to this, because I'm pretty sure its going to happen a lot more. My next approach seemed a bit more successful though. Saw a HB8 walking by herself, and I walked up to her from the front. I started my opener, and I stared right into her left eye the entire time. I felt really present in that moment. She was gorgeous. I don't know if I was holding my smile enough, I'll have to check on that next time, might have looked too creepy. I told her to hug me and she did, and it was nice. I asked her what she was doing, she said she was going to get a coffee before work. I asked if I could come with her, and she said she had a boyfriend. She was already kind of walking away, and I said "How long have you had that problem?" She laughed and said about a year now. And then we parted ways. Oh well, it wouldn't have worked anyways, so fuck it. I approached another girl with the same opener, but by the time I got a good look at her, she was less than a 6, and acted uninterested, and left. There just simply isn't enough volume for me at the mall to continue with this. I wanted to get some more approaches in, but it was getting late, so I decided fuck it I'll do it after the gym.

So I went in, feeling kinda shitty, but I told myself I would let that fuel my workout instead of burn it. I looked in the mirror and when I thought my hair looked good, it was actually fucked up, aha. Maybe that's why the first lady ran off, because I looked like a psycho. I PR'd on my overhead press, and when I thought I was failing at my lateral raises, I found out that it was because I was accidentally adding three extra reps to it. I had actually improved. So I did good, and wanted to try out this arm cardio machine. I gave it a quick spin, and realized this thing is fucking weird, I need some help. I asked the nearest GIRL how to operate it. She told me that she's never used it before etc. I was pretty much done with the conversation because I wasn't attracted to her anyways, but she was continuing. I don't fuck around in my workouts. So I decided to ask a trainer, preferably a female trainer.

And that's where something weird happened.

I asked her to show me. She was black, not really my type, but her smile was unmistakably kinda cute. Because of this, I was calm, present, and ready for any words she'd throw at me. I maintained strong eye contact with her, and good body language. She must have noticed, because she started asking me personal questions, such as asking about the workout log I was carrying, and why I wanted to use this machine in particular. I answered all of her questions confidently and assuredly. Fitness is something I'm no stranger to, so I definitely know what I'm doing. It took time to get good at this. I hope that my game gets to this level one day too, and I always compare these two skillsets, because they are similar in the sense that they're both COMPLETELY new to me. She eventually asked me for my name, and shook my hand. Definitely an IOI. I knew that if I saw her again, I would be giving her my phone, and she would put her number in. I wasn't really interested in her, but I felt like it would be cool to practice more game on her, get some experience, because I would NEVER feel the pressure of fucking up around her.

What makes me really curious; I was successful when I wasn't even trying to game. It's like, when I actually go out for the sake of pickup, it never works. But when I'm just doing my own thing..that's when things get interesting for me. I'll admit, walking around the mall trying to pick up ladies is sounding less and less appealing to me.. But then I remember my success with the 26 year old..

Maybe I should just make my game more passive. Take everyday instances, go do what needs to be done, improving myself, and I'll meet women like that. All of my successes have been a result of doing THAT. I can start going to the bars after I go to the EDM festival, become social, have fun, act like I'm not even there to pick up women. Social vs. Pickup mode.

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Gonna try to keep this as brief as I can!

Today, I decided that I want to just TALK to at least one local girl in downtown Toronto per day. Not try to pick her up; just TALK. I want to put more emphasis on learning to start and hold a conversation, because I'm just NOT comfortable walking up to women with the intention of asking for their number yet. I'm trying, yet not trying. Also, I'm going to start writing down 5 good things that happened to me everyday.

So for the first time today, I did just that. I walked up next to a cute asian girl that was heading in the same direction as me, and tried starting a conversation asking for some coffee money (I buy everyone's coffee at break). She didn't really respond. Then I asked her if she lives around her, that I want to move here one day. She said she lives in the west end. I think I said something funny after that, and then we parted ways. It wasn't much, but its a start. Once I get in the groove of things, I can be more aggressive and have a real conversation.

At lunch, I was walking with my much older co worker who has a daughter my age. He's a major horndog, and is always staring at girls. When we were walking back, we spotted a girl walking in the opposite direction of us, and he said "she's for you, buddy!" I was in a super good mood and laughing, so I decided to just say "Hey, what's up?" I sounded a bit like a douche when I said it, tone too low, and I was dressed like a construction worker so I probably didn't look that friendly. She looked at me, but didn't say anything.

I don't know what it is about the locals here, but they just seem so...cold and distant. I hope that its just me, because I feel more lonely surrounded by all these people than I do in my own house.

Today at yoga, I walked into the lounging area. I've met a lot of people over time here, and out of the seven that were there, I knew at least four. When I sat down and they all said hi to me, I just felt like a fucking rockstar. I noticed a girl sitting next to me, I wasn't really that attracted to her, but figured hey, why the fuck not, more practice. I was a bit too excited, but I think I held myself pretty good. She was reading a magazine; said "Hey, whatcha readin?" We started talking, and I think my best part of the conversation was when she said that she teaches autistic children, but eventually wants to move up to something higher. I said she could move onto psychotic people, like in silence of the lambs. She laughed and said totally, then I leaned in and jokefully flirted saying "You know...I've killed like 18 people, you could teach me ANYTIME." I touched her arm a bit weirdly, kino is something I really need to work on. Still, I would have definitely considered that a success! I moved on and did an awesome yoga class after that. Tommorrow I'll be out with my buddy to get some clothes for that EDM rave party on the 30th.

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Well, some cool shit happened today.

I saw trainer girl (the one who hit on me) with one of her clients, and noticed that she looked much sexier than I previously noticed... All I know is that I need to act exactly how I did when she first met me. We were both busy, so all I could do was say hello.

Put on some swaggalicious clothes, and made my way to the grocery store, and the last time I was there, I kinda flirted with one of the girls who worked at the counter. She recognized me, and smiled, and said hello to me FIRST, before I even went up to the counter. I was going to go for her number, but she wasn't there when I returned. FUCK!

Then I I went to go buy some coffee for the mom, and the girl who usually is there, gives me free coffee. Her friend was there this time, and she knows who I am, but usually charges me. I acted calm and cool, and when she asked if I wanted "anything else", I said "..and a pretty smile " she instantly blushed, and went to make my coffee. She gave it to me for FREE. On top of the girl downtown who gives me coffee for free, and now two girls at my grocery store are giving me free shit? Makes me wonder if I'll ever get to the level of free drinks in a bar..now THAT would be fucking awesome.

Anyways, I felt like a fucking superstar.

Lesson of today: Potential for abundance will always return, even when it gets reduced to ZERO. Just keep doing your thing!

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

It's been week or so since I've posted, haven't had much happen. I've continued greeting and talking to strangers, but what's been really awesome is that I've been working really hard on trying to maintain a good mood and work on my inner game. What I've been doing is imagining a song in my head, and then either imaginary dancing or actual dancing to it, and its kept me in a really good upward spiral, so that I'm naturally happy!

Today I went to a yoga class, and the australian girl I know was there. She greeted me first, and I nudged her on the leg since she was standing and I was sitting. I called her "koala girl", and we were playfully teasing each other, and my proudest moment was when I said "Yeah, you like getting called horrible names, you kinky girl?" she laughed. After the class, I asked her to take a photo of me doing yoga just because, and after being a bit impressed with one of my poses, asked if I can do handstands, and she showed me how. I was watching her, but I felt less in control since she was teaching me. I should have held her legs up and not let her back down as a joke, I REALLY wish I could have thought of that.. when we left, she complained about how she still had her makeup on, and that she looked like the joker. I said "a SEXY joker!" She awkwardly laughed and said thanks. I immediatly felt a sick feeling in my gut, like when I hit on the girl at the tanning salon. We talked for a bit after that and we both left the yoga place. I think I recovered a bit better, because even though I said it a bit awkwardly..I meant it. I was able to maintain good strong eye contact, body language, and for the most part, good wording with her, until the end. I dont know if she's completely rejecting me at this point, but if she is, I'll easily get over it, because I've been in this situation MANY times. I'll have to see the next time I see her! Peace!

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Alright some cool shit happened today to totally make up for the shit that happened yesterday xD

So I go to the gym, and I just decided to be in a super good mood today, as part of my new strategy to be permenantly happy and awesome, and make me not even care about girls. The cute lady at the front desk noticed this, and called me out on it, and I was just in a super awesome mood and said that I listened to Kieza on the way here and I'm super pumped. I later asked her for some benchpress tips, and I'm gonna meet up with a trainer for free as part of my package.

Later I went to the book store, to knock the "buy books pua dudes mentioned to me" off the to do list. I wore my new shutter shades (the kind kanye west wears) inside, and I just felt like a million bucks, because I was having so much fun just wearing them, like "am I seriously fucking doing this? xD" I went at the time I suspected would be the busiest, and it was probably the exact opposite. I asked some girls to give me some advice for books, and strike up some conversations. I told one girl about the EDM concert I'm going to, and put my glasses onto her for fun. I think for one of the first times, I was genuinely having a good time striking up a chat with a girl, instead of trying to impress her and shit. I dont know if she was having fun too, she kinda kept going back to books and stuff, but I know that I was, and that's a huge step for me. I eventually saw her again and genuinely asked her if she was german, because she looks like my german neighbour. She said she was polish, and then I told her that she has the exact same nose. I might have insulted her, but I know I was telling the truth, aha.

Also interesting while I was there, a girl I haven't texted in like a MONTH jokingly gave me shit for not wishing her happy birthday, and said "give me one good reason to invite you to my house party tommorrow". I told her that "I'm sexy....but then again, I'm a troublemaker, so maybe you shouldn't trust me " I knew she was going to invite me over anyways, but I thought it was pretty flirty. Its so weird..our first date went kinda awkward, and now she's texting me again. I knew I had to get her a book since she's a huge bookworm, so I asked a different girl there for a book. She picked an amazing book for me, and I liked the book so much that I HAD to give her a hug, it would be the PERFECT gift. She eventually introduced HERSELF to ME, right before she was going to help another customer, so I shook her hand, and held it for a few seconds while maintaining some sexy eye contact. I felt it would have been inappropriate to ask her for number at that point, so I wandered around a bit, hoping to run into her again, and then I would just give her my phone and say "just put your number in!" I never ran into her again. I wanna learn how to act and seize the moment..it would have been flawless.

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

So I went to this house party. It was kinda how I expected it, but it was MUCH more exciting then I thought it would be. There were like five asian girls my age, and I was the only dude. The rest was little kids, and grownups. Fuck, if only my game was better..But still, I promised myself that I would go to this party simply to have FUN. And fuck, I had some great fun. I introduced myself to everybody, I was social and I feel like I really brought this party to life. I'm just so proud of myself for the social skills I've managed to develop. I can go places without forcing fun, I had an authentic good time. I didn't do anything I didn't want to do. The birthday girl has been texting me like non stop, and while we only hugged and shit, I knew she wouldn't do more than that, and I'm happy that I didn't go for anything more, because I would have lost the opportunity to at least make a good friend, with a large social circle of girls who are my age.

If I end up getting friendzoned.. I wouldn't be mad. Maybe it would be better!

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Alright, so its a week later.

Barely a day after that party, I was texting the birthday girl, and we were talking about finding nemo. I said to her that "I would DIE to see it again." I was implicitly describing our next date, I'm sure she isn't dumb. But she took the bait, and said "We can watch it together!" And asked me for a date and time. Wow, easy. Hopefully this time she won't be so fucking shy. And I'm going to be super game, because tommorrow I'm going to an enormous rave party, with shit loads of girls, booze, loud music, and thunderstorms. Hopefully I don't get sick..Seriously. I got a sick new haircut, a 0-1 fade, with lines on the side, I look so wicked. That combined with my shutter shades, I'll be like a party animal! Aha. CANNOT wait to get into that crowd.

Today after the gym I went to the tanning salon, and was greeted by a new HB 8.5 that I haven't seen there yet. I don't know what the fuck happened, but I was incredibly focused and ready to game. Here's our interaction, basically.

Her: Hey, how are you?
Me: (pause a few seconds) SENSATIONAL.....How are you?
Her: Sensational? That's freaking awesome, I've never heard that one.
Me: Yeah? Are you gonna steal it from me now, and tell people that whenever they ask how you're doing?
Her: Haha probably.
Me: I just shake my head sideways no.
Her: I'll give you credit though, don't worry!
Me: GOOD.

I go tanning, and come out. I know it would be weird like last time if I just walked up to her and started talking even though I had no obligation to, so I tactically came out with my shoes off, walked to the couch, and started tying them there.

Her: How was your tanning?
Me: It was good.....ACTUALLY, NO. It was.....SENSATIONAL.
Her: Haha I'm totally using that now!
[conversation stops, I continue tying shoes, not caring or under pressure]
Me: What are you up to tonight?
Her: I'm going to my friend's birthday party with a hot tub, a pool, he's got a huge backyard. Gonna be a ton of people!
Me: Sounds like fun...I got you beat though.
Her: Why?
Me: I'm gonna be raving for 12 hours straight tommorrow.
Her: Really? At [some place]?
Me: No, at [some place].

She starts talking about raves and shit, and eventually mentions one party that I ask about, and she says it will be super wicked, people even get married there in an inflatable church. A part of my brain feels the need to say something to this IMMEDIATELY, but I've been in this situation enough times to not react. I'm not doing anything I don't want to.

Me: Wow, that sounds so cool!!!!!! I want to go to that..
Her: Yeah! blahblahblah its so awesome blahblahblah

I start to walk away.

Me: By the way, we're totally getting married in a rave church.

We both start to laugh hysterically and awesomely, and I tell her its time for me to go, and I walk out as we're both laughing. For a girl who is way older than me, and I'm definitely going to see again, I'd like to take it slow. It usually works out better that way I maintained great intentional eye contact, good body language, kept my voice smooth and slow, and my wording was pretty decent. I wish the distance could have been closed better, because I was like, 10 feet away from her almost the entire interaction. It's something I'll have to work on!

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Umm..so wow. What a day at this concert. I just got back so I'm still a bit drunk.

I started out by just getting in line etc. I started making friends with just anybody, and it went pretty successful. I asked this one group, that had a HB 9 in it, when my favourite DJ was playing. They said they didn't know. They eventually started to take a group selfie, and me with my awesome shades on, went "HEY, I WANT TO BE IN THIS TOO!" and they're like sure! I held my arms around two of the girls, including the HB 9, and after she was like you're awesome! I said NO, YOU'RE awesome! I like your roses! Never really went past that. Just for fun, there was this girl wearing a garbage bag (since it was raining) high fiving everybody, and I was just like "oh my god, I love your outfit." and we hugged, aha! It was cool. I met this other dude and made good friends with him throughout the hour I spent in that line, it wasn't really that boring. The craziest thing I did, was I saw this dude filling his water bottle with raindrops from the sky, and letting the water from his elbow drip over the bottle. Being the crazy idiot I am, I'm like "BRO! GIMME THAT BOTTLE!" And I fucking drank from it. Everybody was laughing, and I was the centre of attention. It made things pretty awesome. I met this one dude and a HB 7 right after that, and we had some fun laughs, and we hung out after we got past security. I asked them if we could all get a picture together, but the dude stayed behind and just took a picture of me and her. I thought they were together, but turns out they JUST met that morning. The dude eventually had to go, so it was just me and the chick. I could have easily left at this point, but I said fuck it, and I hung out with her and got drinks.

We started talking, having fun chats, dancing with each other. Fuck, it was actually pretty fun. I teased her, poked at her, took photos with her. At one point, she went behind me to put her bag down, and I was just dancing and getting in the zone by myself. I saw this one group, and a girl was staring at me. I immediately gave her the middle finger, for fun, and she gave me the middle finger back. I met with some other dudes, earned their respect, and they offered me to do some drugs with them. I told them I'd meet up with them later, and hung out with the HB 7 some more. Regretfully she seemed a bit timid, didn't really want to go anywhere THAT much. We went dancing in front of the stage eventually, and I got a photo with her kissing me on the cheek. We started dancing and I tried kissing her on the neck, and my fucking shades broke. My mojo kinda went down after that, because I feel like my GOLDEN shutter shades were like, the main thing that made me the party animal I was. Eventually we met up with some of her friends, and we went on a free ferris wheel, and here's where it gets awesome. I knew that at the top, you always kiss. I took out and turned on my phone, and when we got to the top, I told her to kiss me. And she did. I got my first K-Close. We had to try like three times because I wasn't sobre enough to handle my phone properly. Not my first kiss, but since I've started trying out PUA...it is. I felt pretty boss.

After that we hung out a bit, took some more pictures, but with the music ending, the vibe kinda died and we both just split up, and I left. I'm kinda disappointed that it had to turn out that way, but for my first rave party, I feel like it couldn't have been a whole lot better, considering I went there BY MY FUCKING SELF. There was opportunity, and I took it. I had no idea how friendly people could be at raves, everyone is so fucking nice. I like it.

For my next rave..I'll be even more ready! I've got a date with the filipino girl on monday, and we're gonna be talking about it. I don't think mentioning the kiss will be a good idea though! I'll just mention I met a girl.

_________________
I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Never got to meet up with that filipino girl, she had a dentist appointment. I don't think she was lying though, not only was she pretty descriptive, but she was the fucking one who invited me in the FIRST PLACE.

Today I went to my usual coffee shop, and the coffee girl there who hits on me asked me how it went. I tested my seduction skills on her for fun once, so she mentioned "did you manage to work your seduction on any girls?" And I said "Sorry, I don't kiss and tell " I felt pretty boss about that!


But I've been doing some further reflection on that EDM fest though. Even though I made some accomplishments, there's so many things I should have done differently. The first girl that said "Oh my god, you're so awesome." I could have said "Oh, that's so awesome of you to say, let's get a picture together." That would have allowed me to better isolate her.

The fucking glasses. My golden shutter shades. The way my mind works..it's like a fucking barrier to fun, and I can't break it, and I'm unaware of it. But those shades broke that barrier. By wearing the shades, I wasn't even drunk and I was doing whatever the fuck I wanted to do. They made me feel alive. Having them get destroyed on me made me realize that. Because as soon as they broke, I felt trapped again. My first thought was "Now I'm fucked. I have to stay with this girl, and if I were to lose her, my night will be fucking OVER." That caused me to be overly needy around her. I followed her everywhere, barely left her alone. I tried to pretend to not pay attention to her, but I detected me own neediness and I knew it was failing me, but I couldn't let go. And that's why she left. I latched on. In some past experiences with girls, I was definitely needy. No more of this.

When we kissed, I should have just told her a bit after, "I'm gonna go buy some drinks, I'll meet up with you after!" And then I would be able to enjoy the rest of the event meeting as many people and expanding my experience. Instead, I left hours early, meeting barely any people.

At one point this girl showed me her finger nails. I just held them, but I could have said something along the lines of "Wow, you think pretty finger nails are enough to seduce me? You're gonna have to try harder than that, sweety." This can be applied to a lot of things. I'll remember this.

_________________
I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.

Holy fuck, I today I have demonstrated fucking WICKED conversational skills at my yoga studio with a new girl, and I even used some old lessons to not fuck myself over.

So I walk into the yoga studio, and I just have some fun with the clerk. Nothing serious, just fucking around. Enough so that everyone can see how effortlessly awesome I am I go get changed then go sit in the waiting area. I notice a cute blonde HB 7.5 to my right, and IMMEDIATLY say "Hey, what's up?" She smiled, then I asked her what the book she was reading was.. Fuck it I'll just make this easier

Her: Oh, it's ______ macbeth.
Me: Oh, is it like that shakespeare thing?
Her: No, it's blahblahblah
Me: The sister of this..one girl I'm seeing (the filipino girl) is like only 13, but she's totally into that shakespeare shit. Like she was reciting lines to me, and I'm like WTF is wrong with you?
Her: Haha, I like shakespeare. I really liked othello!
Me: I never got to read that one, that's like the super advanced one, right?
Her: No, it was just like the normal one I think..Highschool was so long ago...

Me: [look out the window, I'm not nervous, but I have nothing to say]

Her: How long have you been out of highschool? [Pretty sure this is an IOI]
I stare at her and then laugh, and just tell her to guess my age.
Her: I'm gonna say 24.
I nod no.
Her: 23? 22? 21?


Her: 19?

Me: BINGO.
Her: Wow, that's like so far from me.. [Really sure this is an IOI]
Me: I want to guess how old you are........24?
Her: NO, I DO LOOK OLDER THAN I AM! I'M 23!
Me: Holy crap, would you relax, that's like only a year older!
Her: It's since I've ever cut my hair shorter I guess..
Me: Yeah. It makes you look like an office secretary or something!
Her: Oh my god, that's actually what I am. I'm actually a blahblahblah, but that's basically like an office secretary.

[I just look around the room feeling boss as fuck, everybody is quiet while I'm here having an awesome conversation with a girl I just met]

Her: What do YOU do? (IOI, right? I mean, if they ask you questions..)
I stare at her for a bit, and slowly say I am a "glorified bum!" (thanks mystery)
Her: Oh wow, that's..awesome!
Me: Totally, I just panhandle everyday, make a shitload, then work corners every night at 10!
Her: Oh wow, really? I think I've seen you before!
Me: Oh yeah, I remember you, one of my customers!
Her: No no no, I threw some trash at you!
Me: You.....EVIL...WOMAN.
Class is beginning soon, so she tells me she's gonna put away her book.
Me: Go ahead....just don't throw it at me.

She comes back and we start walking in..

Her: I think I've seen you here last time, you were here with your buddy.
Me: Buddy? I don't really have a "buddy", I just know people here. It's okay though, YOU can be my buddy! (fucking genius.)
Her: Aha okay.

We go and pick up our blocks, and she actually lays her mat down right next to mine. My beginning resting pose was super fucked up because I was so excited that I actually managed to do this. These past two years I've spent slowly refining my game, learning the ropes, learning lines, how to properly have a conversation. Mastering my inner game. Not only did I have a conversation with her that I TRULY enjoyed, I managed to strike up conversation with total ease, relaxed, I kept social mode the entire way.

I go on throughout the class just focusing on myself in the mirror. I don't want to get caught looking at her or something the entire time, because that will make me appear as needy. After this past week, that's what I want to master the most. I high five her at one point after a SUPER tough core exercise, and props her at the end. We both me a "POOSH" sound like we're awesome, and she said "We're the two 20 year olds who think they're 24!" or something like that. I don't remember, but it was really witty. I know she was saving this line in her head right for the end. Of course she was.

I waited for her to leave first, because as intended, I'm not needy. I don't need her. I'm here to do my own thing. I'm not doing anything I don't want to do. After I know she got up, I go put away my blocks, and see her standing at the door waiting for me, to wave and say goodbye. I wave like a retard, but whatever xD After, When I sit on the bench to tie my shoes, she walks by,and I give her the motion with my hand "Call me " And she makes the same motion back to me and clicks her mouth. Before she leaves though, and this has to be the ultimate confirmation of interest, she asks for my name. She tells me her name is Brooke, and shakes my hand very firm, and I tell her that.

I go outside to the elevator and we cross paths AGAIN. The elevator only goes down one floor, and she saw me waiting for it. She says "Really?" And then I tell her "Uhhhh YEAH. Come join me, it's a super adventure, a blast of fun ups and downs!" She stands at the stairs looking like she's debating in her head, and I'm not even looking at her. I hear the door close behind her, but meh, whatever! I'm not following her. Because I'm not needy.

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I succeed where others fail, purely because the fire inside burns brighter than the fire around me.