| Hey guys,
I wanted to relate this in hopes that other guys out there don't follow that shit advice and have the same thing happen to them that did to me.
There're a couple big name coaches out there who peddle this whole "Never Confirm a date, ever, period" concept.
The theory behind this is that you're supposed to be this busy, high-value, high-in-demand guy who has a lot of shit going on.
- Even worse, that it signals weakness because it shows that you have the idea in your head that she might ditch you, and it's a DLV in her eyes, in fact, she might even cancel on you just because you asked.
Simply set the date and go to the venue on the time/date you agreed. "Assume the sale" as it were, and do not contact her any beforehand, in any way.
BULL. FUCKING. SHIT.
So let's put that theory into action.
Met a girl on a Monday. She has a life, and travels a lot. Was going to be at a conference all through that weekend then have her BFF coming to stay with the her all the next week.
We set a date for 5:00 the following Friday, I picked the place.
I contacted her none, in any way, shape or form, the entire time. I've got a lot going on myself.
The following Friday arrives. Now, if you had asked me that Thursday if I thought the date was still on I would have told you "of course, why wouldn't it be?"
As the minutes tick closer and closer to 5:00, I don't hear a word from her.
5:00 comes and goes, she doesn't call, she doesn't text; In fact, I never heard from her again.
So I ran this "never confirm" thing by a few guys who I know get way more play than I do, and these guys don't go to pick up boot camps, don't read pick up books, and don't consult with pick up coaches, or watch pickup videos.
The answers I got were pretty much:
"Naw dude, I always confirm, I've got too much going on, and I need to know my time isn't being fucked with."
"Hell yeah I confirm! I've only got like 2 nights out of the week I can even really date, if I've freed up one of those nights for her (said "no" to some people, cancelled on others) I want to know we're still on so I don't have to scramble to figure sometching else out."
"My Fridays and Saturdays are too important for me, definitely confirm."
All you've got to do is send a quick text the day before, "Hey, I should be there right at 5" / "I look forward to seeing you tomorrow; I'll see you at 5 at xyz place."
And finally:
"Dude, if you're scheduling a date out over 10 days in advance, you better be doing some confirming. You can't just schedule a date that far out, then drop off the face of the earth; she'll actually think you were the one who bailed"
So don't fall for this bullshit you hear; you'd confirm with your friends if you were grabbing beers after work wouldn't you?
You can be a totally high value guy who has precious time and wants to make sure he didn't make plans for nothing, and his time isn't being fucked with.
I was blown away when I got online later and found how many clueless Redditors and bloggers were also writing this never confirm bullshit.
If these guys I know are confirming, and getting laid more than me, there's probably something to that.
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CHAT