Hi all, last night I had quite the experience and I'd like to share it with all of you. It all began when I checked my POF profile ( which has been rare as of lately) and saw this long message from a hot chick ( 10, no lie) who was obviously into me. My profile took the comedic approach which can be finicky ( most chicks didn't seem to be receptive towards it) Anyway I listed five things I loved, one of which was a songful karaoke 5000 machine. My selling point of my profile was the final sentence. It went something like this. "When messaging me make sure to send me a list of songs you want me to sing for you on our first date." Looking back It wasn't the best line but i guess it worked with this one girl. Anyway, she sends me a list of songs and why she likes them. I send her back a response message commending one of her choices and playfully making fun of the others giving reasons why I could never sing the songs for her. For instance one of hers was "Under Pressure" by Bowie and my response was " I know the song but never understood it. What's pressure?" Something along those lines. she asked where ive traveled to and what music I like. I mentioned some exotic places. Some of which I actually have been to, but most were made up ( which I know didn't bite me in the ass bc we didnt speak of travel spots when we met). I end the message with "I rarely go on POF but you seem like a cool girl. Here's my number, hmu. I shit you not, five minutes barely passed and she sent me a text "8:30 Docs" ( Docs is the abbreviation of a bar in town). I was taken aback but made some joke about not having a doctors appt that I knew of and I told her to meet me at 930, because I needed time to take care of some things.
When I arrive at the bar, I notice after quickly browsing the drink menu, that she had ordered the most expensive beer. This put up a flag for me and at that moment I knew I wasn't buying this girl a drink at this bar, so i didn't until later ( prob a screw up). We are getting into it. She talks about her cat Paul and some other boring shit. I just keep feeding her with opened ended questions. She keeps talking. I'm smiling making eye contact listening, shes smiling. We talk about car crashes we've been in. Shit i even talked about the catheter I had shoved up my dong earlier that week. You'd think that would have screwed me but she loved it. She mentioned some weird shit about an ovarian cyst she had a few years back ( I think I blew it because this girl was so crazy I just couldn't or didn't want to pursue her anymore, but I still don't know). Conversation is flowing. She mentions a foursome she had. That was my in and I didn't share a story close to that bc well I've never had a foursome and she took me so off guard that my reply was probably cheesy if I didn't just go and change the subject. She mentions creeps on POF and she shows me messages from them. She hints that the guys don't want to meet in public "FIRST" implying that shes there to drink and bang. Let's backtrack a bit. When I first walked into the bar she said " I thought you were just going to sit in your car outside the bar, wait for me to leave, and then follow me home. ( I need your thoughts on this odd as hell statement guys because I'm lost. Did she want like a fake rape date thing)?? Also she said that she tripped shrooms once and almost jumped off a cliff. Pretty weird. Anyway, We leave the first bar with everything going great, from there things were bumpy.
I chose a second bar that was really laid back and had good craft beer. I had a problem, my ID had expired recently and they called me on it. So, I couldn't get in and we had to find another bar. Same thing happens at the next bar, but I persevere on. Finally we get to the last bar and by this time she seemed pretty drunk already. The conversation starts lapsing a bit and I struggle to recover. Once that started I was screwed. We had ordered drinks and when we went to pay the tab the fucking bartender had already put her drink on mine. Plus, bf this chick even knew that the drink was on my tab she demanded it be put on my tab. Whatever it was three or four bucks. We leave its raining talking about trips again. I crack another joke or two but the steam was gone. We get to the parking lot and I don't know why but I leaned in for a kiss, so dumb. She turned and I caught cheek. She sloppily walked to her car and then sped off into the night. I know I screwed up in many places, so please help a brotha out and break this down for me. Thanks in advance guys and thanks for lending the ears.