So after leaving a four year relationship I figured it was time to start doing Day Game again, the first step to that was re-entering the forums in search of a wing. Very quickly I came across a comment written by Hank_Moody in a particular post relieving that he was based in the Manchester area also looking to Day Game. He responded to my message and we arranged to meet the next day outside a Starbucks in the town centre.

Arriving in town a little earlier than expected I did a warm up in WHSmith on some guy in the Marvel/DC section reading a spider-man comic. After a very long friendly chat I excused myself to meet Hank_Moody. I left pumped, ready to talk to any beautiful women who may have the unfortunate pleasure of meeting me.

There’s a group of guys outside the Starbucks, I count four. A group of friends out for coffee? I lock eye contact as I’m approaching with who would soon go on to be my mentor for the day. I say mentor and not teacher because a teacher teaches the ‘how’ with a text book definition whereas a mentor teaches you the ‘why’ with a life’s passion.

“Hi have you guys seen my friend Nick” I was told there would be more APUA eager to learn about 10 minutes before the meeting spot and to mention a ‘Nick’. “He’s suppose to be around here somewhere?”
“Nick?” Great I’ve got the wrong person.
“Yeah you can’t miss him he’s got this crazy hair-do”
“Are you here to Sarge or are you actually looking for Nick?” Apparently not.
“You’re the gentlemen I’m looking for” I smiled and felt relieved I hadn’t opened the wrong person
“Why didn’t you just say you were here to Sarge?”

Honestly I couldn’t really answer that I hadn’t thought about it, maybe the idea of going through the hassle of explaining what I meant by ‘Sarge’ as the group of four looked at me in confusion. All I knew was I didn’t mention to the average Joe what I did in my few spare hours of the day; I kept to myself.

We introduce ourselves, everybody did and it was a comforting SPAM. Although they didn’t resemble any celebrity or high standard of beautiful they were far from ugly, they were average looking, they were regular people who were in this to improve themselves, they were me. I was surprised to find that not one of these four individuals were Nick or Hank_Moody.The person I had locked eyes with and opened was called Shane, a name I later forgot and had to ask for again, ran across the street to this beautiful women and did a direct street approach. Something I’d witnessed on videos and read about on blogs but never actually seen in really life. He begins to walk back to us and once close enough he smiles and says “boyfriend”.

Still no sign or Nick or Hank_Moody, the two people I was now curious to meet. We disbanded and Shane took myself and James, another newbie like myself, and began to walk down the street when I got a call from Hank_Moody who I later found out to be called Matt. He was running late and wanted to join so five minutes later we met him outside on the main high street.

Now there were three sad looking saps who wanted to meet women but didn’t know how, and Shane. Shane was a young enthusiastic or dare I say passionate student who studied bugs and in his spare time met up with various PUAs around the UK to learn Game. He himself was now coaching and even charging but Saturday Sarges were a freebie as he mentioned Day Game was something he loved to do and teach. At some point he also mentioned how he was doing this six hours a day at one point. There wasn’t many women he hadn’t approached I’d later find out.

He took us down a quiet side street to show us how to do a street approach but before anything started I was spotted by someone who I knew from University. Jacob came over and said hello, began asking what we were doing and how we knew each other. All eyes were on me and all I could do was give indirect responses, I’d only met these strangers 5 minutes ago and I’d never expected to tell anybody my Game.

“Let me stop you right there” Shane looked at me with an understanding look and then to Jacob. “I’m a dating coach” back to me “Continue”

Was he testing me, making things harder for me? Again it threw me off, if I wanted anyone to know what I did I wanted them to know I was good at it not that I needed help. Some dialog is a blur but it took what felt like milliseconds for Shane to offer Jacob the chance of observe, he didn’t stay long and left probably because he didn’t really understand it.

Shane taught us how to make eye contact and stop the target and after a quick fifteen minutes we were on the street but before any approaches started Nick showed up and took Matt. It was now Shane, myself and James. At one point we passed someone who had practiced game with Shane at the same time one of Shanes targets from last week walked past with her mother no doubt. The stranger seized the moment and ran over to both mother and daughter and had his arms round both of them laughing. It didn’t look like Pick-up, more like friendly conversation between friends. At that point I realised the PUA community really did exist and wasn’t something AFC fantasised about.

Shane was always pushing us to do an approach, “her” he’d point and gently push us on the back. Despite getting brushed off by the first three women Shane didn’t get frustrated with me. I liked that, after all Dale Carnegie wrote a chapter explaining why people don’t learn from criticism. I suppose growing up with my father I was always expecting to but broken down. Imagine your father shouting at you telling you you’re an idiot because you can’t paint a door right despite it being your first time with a paint brush. I braced myself and numbed every part of my inner-self I could but when criticism never came I didn’t consider that normal behaviour. (Normalcy Bias)

There was so much information to take in, things like the number of approaches I’d done, their faces and reaction were all gone, it was all about how to do it right and do it better next time. We met the others and had a small exchange of words. I left with more than I expected and a ‘number’, Shane gave numbers to people depending on their skill. I didn’t ask my level but judging from the look on his face when he turned to Nick and told him I presumed it was a flattering thing I’d received a number in the first place.

I left with Shane’s contact number in my phone, I’d made more progress with these people than the countless amount of hours reading books and watching videos. My confidence feels heightened, like after an intense workout when your muscles are pumped, I hoped it would last and continue to grow and who knows, as I’m writing this maybe it will.

On my way home I played my best approach in my head:

“’Scuse me” Keep the eye contact “I know this is really random but I just noticed you” Don’t break it “and I thought you looked really nice” now harden and prepare for the brush off
“Thank you” Is, she smiling?
“Yeah, I love the whole European thing you got goin’ on there, what part are you from?”
“Poland” Normalcy Bias kicks in and the insecure child begins to surface slowly
“Well you’re rocking that outfit, what’s your name?”
“Balka, like in Street Fighter” (Assuming she meant Blanka) Why is she talking to me?
“I like that” I look at my watch, I’ve been rebuffed too much I can’t handle another rejection, I have to have the high ground “I’m meeting a friend soon but it was great talking to you, y’know your name would look better in my phone” Was that cocky/confident or just plain cheesy or even creepy
“Sure, you can have my number” What? Are you seeing the same person I see in the mirror every morning? You’re giving your number to that? Really?

I texted her somewhat several hours later with no response, she is so far the second women to have humoured me. I’m not mad at her; it reminds me that I have good qualities, those that women are willing to invest in. Balka actually cured me of my oneitis I developed for someone living opposite me, I owe her my thanks.

- Logic