got LJBF'd what did I do wrong?



Users browsing this forum: No registered users and 27 guests
Post new topic Reply to topic   Board index » Real Life Gaming » Field Reports




Author Message
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2008 4:53 pm 
Offline
New to MPUA Forum

Joined: Thu Jan 31, 2008 4:26 pm
Posts: 3
Ok just looking for some advice here, this HB8 emailed me on plentyoffish and said that I was her type, we emailed back and forth for about a week, I escalated to talking on the phone, there was definetly a connection between us, we had many common interests etc. we were both into live music so I suggested we meet at a bar where bands play... I met her there on a Friday night, we started drinking, I ran fairly solid game, I DHV'd, good kino, and got several IOI's. after a few drinks I suggested we move locations, (I planned this purposely) we got a table closer to the stage and watched the band play, at this point we were both getting a little toasty and started getting closer, her shields were down and there was definetly a connection, next thing the band started to play "yellow ledbetter" by pearl jam, a band we both mentioned that we liked, I grabbed her hand and we started slow dancing, after a few minutes I saw the famous doggie dinner bowl look and I went in for the K-Close, Great success! We were making out throughout the rest of the night, she mentioned that she liked to smoke a little ganja so I suggested we go back to her place and have a smoke, which was a great excuse to get to her house, so after a while we left, went back to her place, had a little smoke and proceeded to make out again, this time much more heavily, I worked down her neck, started kissing her stomach and then she cut me off and said she just met me, so I backed off for a bit and we talked more, about her goals, dreams blah blah blah, I then went back in this time she cut the lights, lit candles, and put on some love makin music, Im thinking im in like flynn, I start kissing her more, try to kiss her more and slowly work my way down for 3rd base, as soon as I proceed to try to get her pants off, " I dont think you want to go down there right now" and im thinking fuck, she's on the rag so I back off again, we ended up making out more cuddling, and eventually passed out. The next morning we woke up, talked more, and made out more. but I had to go to work so I left after a while, we made plans to hang out later that night (bowling). ... Later that night around 5:30 I called her no answer but she texted me back a few minutes later and said she was in a movie with her sister, no big deal. I get out of work and called her, she says that she is t ired and might just pass out but we'll hang out tommorrow, I said cool. The next day I call and we make plans to hang out, (go to a bar and watch the football game).. Well I go back over to her place and boom... everythings different, forced conversation, awkward silence. She lives with her sister and she was fairly cold to me, so we get to the bar and more of the same, she just wasn't reacting the same at all... after a while she basically gives me the LJBF speech, I was pissed. Anyways, is this simply a case of the girl was drunk and hooked up and regretted it when sober, or did I do something? she said "it's nothing you did" but who the fuck knows. Im somewhat pissed because I do like this girl we've emailed a few times since then but havent met, but she is responsive to me over emails.. I dont have oneitis because theres other girls that im talking too but fuck I did like this one. any advice on how to crawl out of the freind zone or should I just let this die?


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2008 5:01 pm 
Offline
Moderator
User avatar

Joined: Sat Oct 20, 2007 6:58 pm
Posts: 5702
Location: Nashville
The only thing I can see is you got "LJBF Carded" because you might have moved too fast for her. I'm not saying she didn't want to do it, if she cut lights and lit candles then yeah. My guess is she's trying to rationalize it in her head by saying she was drinking, and smoking. Sounds mostly like buyer's remorse to me. You did it right going for the freeze out and backing up, then going back at her.

The other idea is she's handing you the friend card because she doesn't have enough comfort built with you, and that's what she's wanting to build. I mean you did pretty much get a "Fools Mate" or would have is she wasn't well, um out of order at the time.

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2008 6:01 pm 
Offline
PUA Forum Leader
User avatar

Joined: Tue Jan 29, 2008 8:39 pm
Posts: 914
Sounds like you did everything right. Looks like you were in. But smooth is right, it might have been a bit fast for her. She might have felt like she was just a poa to you.

When she said she was tired and that you two could hang out the following day, I would have said that tomorrow is no good and set up another day. By her setting the time to hang out she has the control. If you set it up for another day it shows that you are busy and you keep control.


Top
   
 Post subject:
PostPosted: Thu Jan 31, 2008 6:57 pm 
Offline
Member of MPUA Forum
User avatar

Joined: Fri Dec 07, 2007 7:46 am
Posts: 131
Jsmooth is right she had buyer remorse. there's a good book that talks about "state breaks" called Magic Bullets by Savoy.
Her getting up to light candles and turning on music is a "state break"it gave her time think about what was happening like Jsmooth already said.
You should back off a bit and not send the emails. She'll only plunge you deeper into friend zone doing that. You need to let her know what you want from her and if she's not down with that then forget her.


Top
   
Display posts from previous:  Sort by  
Post new topic  Reply to topic  [ 4 posts ] 

All times are UTC


You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot post attachments in this forum

Search for:
Jump to:  

Can we be honest?

We want your email address. Let me send you the best seduction techniques ever devised... because they are really good.
close-link