I'm really confused. (i'm a noob)



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PostPosted: Tue Jun 05, 2012 10:59 am 
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Joined: Tue Jun 05, 2012 10:10 am
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It is my first FR, please correct me also if there is any problem with the form itself etc.

Background: Recently i have been helping my friend in his 'amateour movie' project. Bunch of ppl with movie passion and camera. Nice idea, many new ppl etc, why not :).

FR: I'm a noob
First meeting.
I was asked to help my friend in his search for a nice cafe for his movie. So there was me, him and HB8. I was talking to her about scenery, my own movie passion. I have added some negs ( in the end too much i think..), after an hour she attacked me saying that i'm rude and i have bad manners and trying to look smart. After this she was thinking out loud, that maybe it's some weird way of hitting on her. I had no idea how to responed so i said that not really cause i'm in a relation. It killed the topic and then conversation was normal again.

Second meeting. - a few days later
I met her in a bigger group during shooting. I was there with my sister but at the beggining i didn't mention that we are related. I saw that HB was a little bit confused, but when i have mentioned that she is my sister, HB just jumped at her and started a conversation with her. I have joined after a couple of minutes and heard from my target that now she knows more things about me. Then she mentioned that she recently had a birthday but many forgot about that. Instatly i have pat her head and said "poor little thing". At the end of the day when i was saying goodbye to her, i gave her a little flower and said 'happy birthday' and hugged her. Next day i texted her about 'fate of the flower' and the answer was "i have put it in a vase/i have placed it in my special place/i don't remember what happened to it/i have throwed it away/ select your answer, i dont want you to analysis it." I was shocked and called her, but she just said that she is busy..

Third meeting - again a few days later
We went to a concert in a bigger group. From time to time i was alone with her. I was asking about flower etc, but she didn't say anything. After third attempt she said that it's too personal and i shouldn't ask. I thought 'ok, i got rejected', no problem. But the day was long and again i was alone with her, she was standing really close to me (too close!!), so i wanted to test something. I have touched her face and moved hairs from her forehead behind her ear, touching her cheek. No problem, she didn't run away, it was something normal for her. So ok, i have said "i won't ask about flower etc if we go for a walk". She said ok, but within a week, because she is leaving for a few days.

First phone conversation - 4 days later
I have called and asked about her trip etc, she almost didn't say anything and finished the conversation. After a minute she texted me that she is sorry but she with ppl, busy and can't really focus on the conversation. 30 secs and second message about my phone provider. I texted back and she gave me her second number from same provider.

Second phone conversation - 5 days later
I knew that she is back so i called again. I have asked about our meeting but she said "when this everything is over", "what everything?". "You know, this movie project, also i have exams next weeekend. So maybe next week".

And then i was like "wtf?!".

So now..

Comments:
I dont really want to repair anything, i think that case is closed and end of story. But i want to find out what mistaked i have done and where i need to improve myself.


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PostPosted: Thu Jun 07, 2012 6:19 am 
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It appears that you were showing too much interest in her too fast.

She knows you like her, and want to get with her. But all your intentions/gestures
made her think that you only wanted one thing from her. SEX.

You just need to learn a little self-control. Don't try to rush things with females.

Believe it or not. Females know exactly what you want from them BY YOUR ACTIONS.

To be blunt. You creeped her out.

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PostPosted: Thu Jun 07, 2012 6:46 pm 
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Joined: Thu Jun 07, 2012 3:53 pm
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i think you had the right idea, but you just need a little experience. i can see you have an idea of what to do, touching her, making fun of her, and you're AWARE of what's going on. just don't panic when you're put on the spot. chill.

so when she said "maybe that's a weird way of hitting on me," you didn't have to say you were in a relationship. you could say something like "hey now, hey now. i don't even KNOW you."

also, i liked what you did with the flower, it was great. but don't take it too far, it's a mistake you only have to make once. remember, the flower was made to be something she'd see and it'd remind you of her... you don't have to constantly remind her of it.

i think for the most part you're on the right track. you just have to balance your forwardness with indifference of the outcome. don't take every instant you see her as a time to talk, give her a little space.

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