Memoirs in Real-time: Humble Beginnings



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PostPosted: Sat Feb 25, 2012 10:16 pm 
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After a longer-than-ideal dry spell and too many hours spent merely thinking about why I'm dissatisfied with my current lifestyle, it's time to take the first fucking step (or rather the first step to fucking, if you prefer).

I'm going to start slowly with body language and the like. Posture, swagger, intent through body language, and of course, eye contact. From there I'm planning on moving to simple greetings while maintaining the subcoms from the previous stage. Next will probably be some form of conversation beyond the greeting. After that, conversations with intent. And finally, the close, whatever type of close it may be.

That's the plan. It's not set in stone but rather something to guide my thinking over the coming weeks and months.

As a final note, my life is set up in such a way that day game will be my focus, so all the crap above this sentence is vaguely aimed at day-game-esque situations.

On today's menu: walking into Town and making some motherfucking eye contact.

Good luck, me.


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PostPosted: Sat Feb 25, 2012 10:46 pm 
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Quote:
After a longer-than-ideal dry spell and too many hours spent merely thinking about why I'm dissatisfied with my current lifestyle, it's time to take the first fucking step (or rather the first step to fucking, if you prefer).

I'm going to start slowly with body language and the like. Posture, swagger, intent through body language, and of course, eye contact. From there I'm planning on moving to simple greetings while maintaining the subcoms from the previous stage. Next will probably be some form of conversation beyond the greeting. After that, conversations with intent. And finally, the close, whatever type of close it may be.

That's the plan. It's not set in stone but rather something to guide my thinking over the coming weeks and months.

As a final note, my life is set up in such a way that day game will be my focus, so all the crap above this sentence is vaguely aimed at day-game-esque situations.

On today's menu: walking into Town and making some motherfucking eye contact.

Good luck, me.
Good for you! Keep us updated. Forging ahead and reporting your experiences are the heart of the community!


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PostPosted: Sun Feb 26, 2012 3:31 am 
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DAY 1: Eye Contact

Goals: Get comfortable holding sexually-charged eye contact with women


Report

I spent the afternoon walking around the shopping district of Town and the mall.
Tried to make eye contact as much as possible, but found that few people bothered to look anywhere but straight ahead of them.

I tried to add some sexual intent to my gaze and gait but unsure how successful that was.
I should practice that with a mirror first and see if I then get better results.

Imagined that nothing could bother me or make me tense up.
Stayed relaxed even when walking through high-energy sports bar area.

It seemed like this relaxed way of carrying myself carried over to my talking, too.
Talking to the saleswomen, I sounded smoother and had a deeper voice than usual.

Smooth conversation with salesguy in Brookstone seemed so natural and easy.
I feel I could easily do the same with an attractive female one.

The eye contact I did make seemed to work well, and the girls generally held it for a moment or two.


Lessons

>Imagining that I know what the girl will look like naked in my bed carries over well into making eye contact more sexual

>Girls don't often make eye contact out of the blue. It's much easier while talking to them and you have their attention.

>Relax. Walk slowly. Breathe. Be present.


Next

>Continue with the eye contact

>Practice facial expressions in the mirror

>Use eye contact in daily conversations

>Start thinking about and fixing neck posture


And so it begins...


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 27, 2012 8:57 pm 
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Daily Practice

While walking around campus today, I made my neutral expression the more sexual look I practiced in the mirror:
> Eyelids slightly lowered
> Hint of a smile
> Relaxed brow
> Chin neither raised nor lowered

I felt like I was getting more glances than usual from girls. Whether I actually was getting more, I dunno.

My posture seemed to follow my face's example.
It was confident and relaxed most of the day.
I still have to focus on keeping my neck in line with my spine, so I don't revert back to looking like The Simpson's Mr. Burns.


Tomorrow I'm going back into Town after classes, so I'll see if my subcoms garner any more attention than last time. Then on Thursday I'll start practicing saying hi to strangers.

I also feel like I should lay out a plan describing how long I expect to work on each stage of my development.


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PostPosted: Mon Feb 27, 2012 9:52 pm 
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CALENDAR

March
1-8 Passing Greeting: Say 'Hi' to cute chicks while walking by them. Start a conversation if I'm feeling ballsy, but that's not the goal of this exercise.
>1: Four solid 'Hi's with mutual eye contact. One conversation with an employee
>3: More than March 1.
>6: Three 'hi' replies. Two turtle doves. And going somewhere out of my comfort zone, such as Gucci or another high-end store.
>8: Hi's to everyone that makes eye contact. Two conversations with employees in high-end stores.

9-17 Chance Conversation: Strike up conversation with girls without going out of my way (e.g., saleswoman while shopping, cashiers, girls on elevator, waiting for crosswalk)
>9/10: Friend visiting. Four attempts to start conversations with pedestrians.
>13: Ten attempts to start conversations with pedestrians.
>15: Three decent conversations lasting more than a minute or two
>17: Continue approaches, but no ejecting when it feels you should. Push interaction

To be continued...
And maybe changed, too.


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PostPosted: Wed Feb 29, 2012 12:10 am 
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DAY 2: Swagger and Intent

Goals: Get used to walking 'well' and new neutral facial expression

Report

I just got another motivation to get down to business and learn this shit. Last night my friend I'm visiting for Spring Break told me one of her friends there thinks I'm cute. It gives me a date to shoot for. By then I want to have made some significant progress.

Anyway, today started a bit slow. As I was walking to town after classes though, I could really feel my mindset switching from school/stress mode into relaxed/aware mode. First few minutes on the street and in the mall were a bit slow. That is, I was getting practically no eye contact from passersby.

Went into Express and started right away talking to the various salespeople. It felt like my tone was spot on. I would hold eye contact well, and speak slowly and deeply. I used to stumble on my words when I had to react quickly to a salesperson saying something to me unexpectedly, but I didn't have that problem at all today. After we locked eyes, one of the female shoppers blatantly gave me the up-and-down. I didn't approach, though.

Occasionally I thought of something clever to say a second too late. I'm sure I'll get faster at that kind of thing with practice.

Wandered over to jeans store and said hi to the 2 saleswomen. One was short and pretty cute. I let our eyes stay locked that extra second when I said hi. The non-cute one was very talkative and we bullshitted about the clothes and Spring break, etc. The cute one offered to help me look for something, but I said I was all set. Could have said I was looking for so-and-so to get a chance to talk with her more and possibly some kino. Next time.

Went into tech store and joked with some of the employees who were playing the demo video games. Said something jokingly to one of the saleswomen but she was unresponsive. Tried CPR. Still no response. She was probably just not a fun kind of person. Or perhaps I'm just not funny. Nahhh, I'm hilarious. [Vanity]

Joked around with employee at preppy store but then I started shutting down. I think I felt intimidated by how well dressed he was compared to my cheaper clothes. It's not something worth feeling intimidated about and something I need to work on.

Went into candle store and talked to cute salesgirl about candles a little, until I asked her something she wasn't sure of. At that point, mama bear took over and she and I joked about how they come up with the names for some of the candles.

Final stop: Apple store. Walked in confidently and headed straight for the iPod and nice headphones next to where a really cute chick was standing looking bored. I put on the headphones (they were really nice) and turned on my favorite song at the moment (cover of Hey Ya by Obadiah Parker). I was very close to her, maybe 10 inches, and she didn't move away at all. She picked up the demo iPod next to mine and started messing around with that. I just jammed out to my song and kept my posture and facial expressions like I'd practiced them. Song ends. I leave. The end.

I've got a coffee date planned this Thursday with a girl that's into me. Her house is really close to the date location and she's invited me before to stay the night, an offer I declined. I'm still up in the air with this one. She's reasonably attractive, but I feel like there's something...off. I've stuck my dick in crazy before and don't want to do so again. Regardless, I'll keep practicing using my new tone, posture, and facial expressions in conversation.


Lessons

> I'm very comfortable talking to employees. I should find some hot ones.

> There are many more people on the street after about 16:30

> Some people just aren't into making life fun; avoid them.

> In a mere 3 days, I can change a lot about how people perceive me.
...imagine what I can do with a lifetime.


Next

> Start with passing greetings

> Keep back straight even with swagger (think angel)

> Incorporate 'the look' more into daily life

> Start getting prepared sexually for possible Spring Break hook-up.

> Get out of comfort zone more. Feel the fear and do it anyway.


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PostPosted: Fri Mar 02, 2012 3:35 pm 
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DAY 3: Passing Hi's

Goals: Say hi to 4 girls with solid eye contact. Have a conversation with an employee.

Report

Well, I fell a bit short of the mark and I've got plenty of excuses if anyone wants to hear me whine. But no one does, so I won't. The day started off with me fighting my way through the cats and dogs falling from the sky. When I made it to the mall, there were actually a fair number of people. I think they too were trying to escape the cats and dogs. Who can blame 'em?

Anyway I walked around a bit, made some semi-decent eye contact: the girl would make eye contact quick, look away, and then look back once before looking away for good. To be honest, I was at a loss at how to just say hi when they were looking away from me most of the time

Maybe I need to trust the fact that they're still mentally focusing on me even after forcing themselves to tear their eyes from me. So if I were to say hi and turn my body language in their direction, presumably they'd notice right away and respond at least physically.

I ended up not saying hi to any pretty girls, but the day got interesting right at the end. After an hour of just walking I was feeling a bit confused and aimless, so I sat down at a table right next to the main corridor. After about 5 minutes of sitting there and trying to look fierce (or something), I noticed these two 6'3 model-type strongmen standing nearby talking and glancing at me every few seconds. As I noticed them, they began making their way towards my table.

Turns out they were A&F recruiters looking for new "models" for their stores. (I believe A&F's idea of "model" is equivalent to a sales associate everywhere else.) So they gave me some card and I'm supposed to come in for a group interview next week.

From what I've heard, it's minimum wage and pretty crappy working conditions. Till just a few years ago, employees had to wear only A&F clothing while working (which they had to buy themselves). But I'll probably go to the interview and have some fun with it. Maybe wear my favorite polka-dotted bow tie. Nothing to lose.

After that debacle, I headed into Sephora and got myself my first fragrance ever and had some decent conversation with the two employees helping me pick one out. Very little kino: they were dudes.


Lessons

> Saying hi to strangers is harder than it sounds. The thing is that it actually isn't. It's incredibly simple. I just have to do it.

> You never know what will happen when you break from routine.

> Feel the excitement and do it anyways.

> Life is mine for the taking. Keep everything in perspective.


Next

> Keep "squinting"

> Work on walking in boots more. It's different.

> Say hi to some random even if it's poorly calibrated. Just get the word out

> Prepare for most important interview of my life


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PostPosted: Sun Mar 04, 2012 7:06 pm 
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3.2 Friday: Exploring Hotels

When a friend flaked on me for Friday night plans, I decided to just go explore Town and have some of my own fun. I basically walked into every nice hotel I passed like owned the place and wandered around it at my leisure from there. I found a few hotel pools that I'd like to sneak into in the near future. Doing this with a girl would make for an awesome date. Wouldn't work as well for instant date since she doesn't happen to be wearing a bathing suit in winter.

I'm fairly certain I didn't make any attempts at saying hi to strangers. I'm still at a loss for how to go about this. I'm trying to picture how it would look or how I could pull it off casually like I do it all the time. Something to meditate on perhaps.

The day was a lot of fun and I had a few heart racing moments when I had to talk my way out of being in the Employees Only areas of hotels, but I can't help thinking it would be so much more fun with a partner in crime.

On the way home on the subway, I helped some semi-cute girls with navigating the trains. I definitely could've kept the conversation going with them while we got on the subway, but instead I walked away after I told them what they needed to know. Next time I should push the interaction. Creepy or bust. Something like that.


3.3 Saturday: Expanding Comfort Zone

After Saturday it's safe to say I'm no longer following my "calendar" from a few posts ago. I still want to go out with a clear goal in mind, though. It seems like a much more efficient way of making progress on weaker skills. So Saturday I decided to work on expanding my comfort zone.

The major step I took was in going into Saks Fifth and looking at their clothes, trying on the stupidly expensive sunglasses, all while I was dressed rather cheaply. Along with Saks, I went into Aldo and tried on $100 flip flops and meditated on a bench in the middle of a busy area.

Perhaps a better way to ease into talking to strangers is to strike up conversations everywhere I can using circumstantial shit. I want it to become a habit, to become natural. I'll add it to my "Rooteins".


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