| This is my field report for 11-16-07.
Met this guy from Boston off of CL who just happened to move down here b/c he got bored.
I got to the bar 1st, this girl asks me by name "Aren't you ____?" I said yeah. She was at a meetup.com event a week ago, I'd say she's an 8.8. I mentioned to her "You're the girl from Northern Viginia, right?" And she said "Good Memory!!" and I said "Warrenton, right?" and she was like "Yeah!!" really impressed apparently. She was there with a guy, who had stepped away, but then he got back and she introduced me. Unfort. the guy was pretty good looking, and about 6 inches taller than me (I'm 5'10") he def. had the whole "would be wearing a vneck sweater and on a tennis league at a private college" kinda look to him, so I hung around for a minute or so and said "Well, I've gotta get back to my friends, I"ll seeya"
He ends up getting there and we grab seats. I mean, he's got the look, he could potentially be a good wing to have around, but I'm not really sure about his confidence. He said he needed to get his drink on first before talking to girls. Then he mentions these hot girls behind me, said he thought the blonde was really hot. I said "You want to talk to these girls?" so I swivelled around in my stool and said "Hi, I'm Rob, this is my friend Jeff." They seemed a little put-off at first. Then a second later I said to the blonde "He really wants to meet you." she still looked unsure, then I said "He's from Boston." The blonde said "Oh, well I'm from NY." and I was like "What part? My dad's from upstate NY. So we got a good discussion about stuff in general going, and they moved in closer so it was now the 4 of us. I focused on the brunette. I mean, the conversation was moving on okay, but I just wasn't getting the IOI's. Ex. I'd ask her, "So what do you do?" and she'd say "Me? I teach 3rd grade math." and wouldn't ask me what I did. But I still wish more poeple had seen us, b/c we really looked like we were holding court, I looked like I was "The Man." with all these people around, talking, etc. and I'm leaning back, chilling, and laughing, etc. I wish I could've harnessed that somehow. So I decide to roll-off, which ended up being a "write-off". The girls were high 7's prob.
Then this 7.5 standing at the bar next to me ordering a drink w/ her friends was all laughing, etc. I tried to test a new opener I thought up "You look like you're having too much fun." She laughed and said "Well, you know...." Then, oddly, all these drinks start coming out and she asks me to watch her beer and make sure nobody take it, while she passes drinks to her friend. In disgust, I take her beer when she's not looking and hand it to my friend telling him to hide it. We played that game for a minute or so, then she was getting pissed so I gave it back to her.
The next set were these hotter girls right next to me, my friend asks if his smoke was bothering them, the brunette, shows him her pack of cigarettes with kind of a bitchy smile, and that was it. I really wanted to talk to the blonde sitting right next to me, but couldn't think of anything to say. She kept turning and looking my way too, but I'm not sure if she was just looking at the door/window for something. We get ready to go to the next bar, and the blonde from set 1 pats me on the side of my shoulder and says "It was nice meeting you." and I said (like a dumbass) "Yeah, seeya"
Apparently at this bar on Fri.'s-Sat. nights, lots of college girls start standing up dancing in their seats to music, etc. It was actually the best venue of the night.
We walk down to the next place and I'm at the bar and this group of high 7's to 8.5's start squeezing in on me b/c they wanted to order drinks. O made the mistake of going straight for the target. This girl that's next to me waiting for her drink, I have a new opener that I haven't completely tested. "Do you go to U of R?" rich-type private college in the area. I play it like I'm always on campus, etc. And if she says "no." I say "Oh, you kinda had that U of R look." She could prob. take that as a neg. or in the very least it gets something going. Either way, she didn't but told me where she did go. I ask her how she liked it, she's not even turning to look at me, she's just looking ahead, like "Yeah, best 4 years of my life." I rolled off and headed up front to the corner of the bar to post up at a seat w/ my wing. I later saw her talking all enthusiastically to some douche who had come up to her, who happened to look better. Fuck her.
This girl then comes up to me with her friends, and the guy's like "Hey man, get the bartender, don't let her try to pay fo rthis." and she says "WEll I'm gonna buy him a drink if you won't let me pay for it." (referring to me) She was prob. a 6.8. She tells me she prob. would've bought me a drink and I'm like "Yeah, I get drinks bought for me all the time." and we talk a little more, apparently she was there w/ guys who were friends/neighbors, they fixed her car, she wanted to pay them back by going out drinking w/ them. But here's the MF'er about it. I try to continue the conv. and she just up and leaves w/ the guys. That's it.
3rd bar, no sets really worth mentioning, but something went on w/ my wing that's def. of concern. THis is, let's see the best way to put it, "The low self-esteem crowd bar." All of these people were kind of non-mainstream, a few steps up from Goth really. and he finds this group of loser-looking guys with 4's and 5's, and he hits it right off with them. I passed a group of 4 guys arguing about which was better, the Sony Playstation 3 or Xbox 360. I was only at that bar b/c I had heard it was more low-key and easier to get a discussion going, but didn't know the crowd was like that. Not sure if that's common of all low-key setting type bars. The music wasn't as loud, there was more open space, etc.
I drank prob. too much, woke up w. a hangover. I had had 3 bourbon and cokes, a carbomb, and jack and coke over the course of those 4 hours. My wing thought it was like a "Get wasted and party hard" night. I guess I need to drill it into my head that the objective isn't to drink a lot and party, right? How tipsey are you supposed to get? Stop at 2 drinks?
Any methods for what you're supposed to do to fill the void? Nauturally if you're in a bar, around lots of people, most people tend to keep sipping the drink they're holding. Do you just pretend to drink, order water only, soda/red bull only, or what? It's tough to pace myself.
Anyway, that does it for this one. I'd def. appreciate any feedback on how to best structure these field reports, etc. or any comments on how it sounds like I'm doing.
I feel like I've already made tremendous strides. I've gone from not even talking to girls at bars to approaching, getting conversations started regardless of the outcome. In college I was in the mindset that all the losers I hung out with were, post up in a good location with lots of hot girls going by and being like "Man, this is a good spot.", without saying a word to any of them. Today, when I was out, I seemed to carry myself with a little more confidence, and getting a discussion started w/ random hired gun didn't seem like a big deal.
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