Word. One way to go about this that I've seen is:

"Yeah, here, put your number in my phone and I'll shoot you a text next time I climb."

Then once she puts her number in, that night you can text, "Hey, I'm thinking of grabbing a drink at xyz place tonight. You should join"

If she's busy and can't make that, usually if she's into you she'll give you a "warm no": "oh that sounds great, but I have xyz. But we should totally go climbing again!"

From there, it's easy to set up logistics again and move the progression forward.

Just one way of many ways. I think it's just a matter of getting the habit of escalating back down. Just stay in the batting cage awhile longer.

_________________
My Pick-Up Journal

I honestly love that eye contact thing and use it often but the bit about going the extra two steps i should try out. It could lead to success. Thanks for the advice Daniel and good luck on your next adventure.

_________________
Omnia Mutantur Nihil Interit

Everything changes, but nothing is truly lost.

Yeah, I think being unexpected is the name of the game. At the end of the day, the best escalation is nonlinear. And I suppose you could think of that as standard push/pull kind of stuff.

I guess a big update is due.

I moved the week before last. As predicted, pretty much everything in my life has already taken off as a result. And I'm still not completely set up or settled in. Early, early days on this new chapter and I couldn't be happier.

So on the day-to-day... here's some of the awesomeness, in no particular order:

--Above all else, I now live a half block from the beach. Ocean = life. I can surf, dive, paddle, lounge in the sand, and hang out to my heart's delight. I probably cannot do this justice with words. It's importance to me is emotional, spiritual... essential. It is LOVE for me: truly, madly, perfectly. It moves me on the deepest level. And now I am whole.

--I've already had a few really fun beach adventures: surfing with good buddies, beach day with some other friends, and a nice Memorial Day BBQ on the beach with some new friends I was just introduced to.

--In the last ten days I've already been on three dates, all with very high-caliber girls. One went nowhere, the other lead to a makeout in the bar, and the last was fucking great. So I guess there's a positive trend developing. Anyway, with the last one: spent a long time with the girl, hit a couple different drink spots, and eventually brought her back to my place. Pretty solid escalation game made that happen. Not A+ quality but the best I've laid down in several months for sure. It started at one, critical point in the bar. I was talking... deep, life philosophy-type stuff. I looked at her and could tell she was getting lost in my eyes and who I am as a person. I felt myself getting enveloped in it too. We were opening up, roaming each other's souls. Something I haven't really done or felt in ages. In situations like that, I tend to think escalation is basically just being genuine about what you're feeling and adding in a little bit of sexual edge, so I just held her eye contact and said "You have no idea how badly I want to kiss you right now." Ten minutes later we were in an Uber back to my pad. Intense makeout session but she was on her period so not a ton beyond that. This girl is 22 years old, has waist length dark hair, weighs about 90 pounds, and has these deep dark green eyes. She's stunning. By the time she left my place, she was hanging on me, cuddling all over me, kissing me, rubbing her face on my beard, and telling me I am so comfortable (girl code for she's catching feelings). Good shit.

--Joined new rock climbing gym, new co-working space, and new regular gym. Following a similar policy to what I've done in the past, which is to basically just aim to meet 1-2 new people each time I'm at any of them. So that's working out well and will help me make new friends and get to know new girls. Already made one new friend at the rock climbing gym who I'm feeling could be a go-to buddy of mine. The regular gym, by the way, is perhaps the most insane "talent pool" of any gym or other "closed group" environment I've ever been to. I just went yesterday for the first time and it was mind-boggling. Most gyms, there are maybe 5 or 6 hotties during peak hours. 10 at the most. Yesterday, there must have been 30 and I caught a few of them throwing me glances.

--I have several new business deals I'm working on at the moment. Slow-going in closing any of them but I'm patient. None of them will be back-breaking but I could realistically DOUBLE my income by the end of the year with them (which I've done - at the minimum - three years in a row now). It pays to write your own ticket.

--I now live in a million-dollar, two bedroom apartment in a luxury high-rise building. It's half a block from the ocean. I have a salt water infinity pool and hot tub that overlook the ocean. My apartment is designer finished (granite counters, top-of-the-line appliances, luxury king-sized bed, etc...) with professional interior decoration. is it expensive? Yeah, for sure. Is it worth it? 1000%. I am so relaxed when I come home. It's comfortable. Welcoming. Sitting out at the pool and in the hot tub in the ocean air is bliss. I didn't expect that but it is some kind of awesome to walk down to a private pool stare out at the ocean and let the sun wash over you. Not to mention I'm also in the primetime location for social events, nightlife, restaurants, and the like. Specifically to the topic of money, a lot of people will tell you stupid shit like "Watch your monthly expenses! Don't drink that latte! You could save yourself $500 a year if you pass it up!" Have you ever stopped to think about how dumb that is? Sure, don't let your spending run out of control. But what's the point of having money if you can't fucking reward yourself and enjoy it? My monthly expenses have more than doubled in the last few years. But guess what? My income has far outstripped that. Save $500 a year??? Fuck that. I won't even blink at a business deal that offers to pay me 10x that much. There's more leverage and more enjoyment in making more and then just not having to worry about spending. Not to mention living in an apartment like this had huge implications on game, social life, and business deals, which is an entire level of value as well.

--Call it inspiration, call it motivation, call it whatever. But the last week, I've been the most productive and doing the best work I've done this year.

My goals right now will mainly revolve around having fun: the friends, chicks, hobbies, adventures, and leisure. And I'll pour every bit of energy and focus into those as I do anything else.

This is what it's all about.

Gosh, your life sounds terrible.

In all seriousness, that is inspiring. Enjoy it man

_________________
My Pick-Up Journal

Haha thanks. I enjoy every moment of it.

In complete contrast to yesterday's post, today I have almost nothing to report on.

I was racing against a deadline all day, so pretty much everything revolved around that. I literally just fired it off. Deadlines aren't ideal but I only have to deal with a few days of stress from them maybe 3 or 4 times a year so I'll take it. Most of the time I'm able to manage my timelines so it's a non-issue. Moving kind of F'd that up a little bit these past few weeks.

Besides, if this is literally the shittiest day my schedule will typically throw at me, I'm a happy man

So yeah, I spent most of the day in the co-working spot. Got in around 10am and left around 5:00pm. As far as I've seen, there are no babes in there ... except for one girl who works there. I suspect she's very much into me too. So we'll see about that. It seems like a situation that I'll want to play very carefully.

There do seem to be a few decent dudes as well and I've been making an effort to introduce myself to most of the folks. I suppose if any of them seem like they could be legitimate friends, I'll begin cultivating those relationships more and moving them beyond the work realm. But so far, I don't know about that so I'm just trying to meet everyone and be friendly. In any case, I should begin asking about their lives outside of work as that's the best way to tell if they're the kind of people I enjoy being around.

After that I rolled to the gym.

Walking in, a fairly sexy girl was coming in right in front of me. She had on flip-flops and sand all over her feet so I said "Coming straight from the beach, yeah?" She just looked at me and then decided to ignore me. Fuck me I guess haha.

A friend of mine was there so I spent a good long while catching up with him since it's been more than two years since I last saw him. It was good to see him.

Since I spent so much time talking to him, I didn't have any real opportunities to chat up new hotties. But again, like Monday, they were EVERYWHERE. I'm pretty confident this gym will yield a few good prospects as I get to know more people in there and also just benefit from "Mere Exposure Effect" (Google it). So like the co-work spot, the goal right now is just to meet and greet with various people every time I'm in there, and to take the layup, low-risk approaches of girls who are in my proximity (like I did with the girl who ignored me today).

Came home, showered, ate and did some more work in the apartment, which I just finished.

I'll probably take tomorrow off from work to do (hopefully) all of the following: run some errands, surf, and climb.

So should be a great, fun-filled, relaxing day and it will also have the added bonus of all three of those things having a high likelihood of putting me in the vicinity of some delicious babes (and cool bros).

Surfing and climbing are obvious because they attract outgoing, adventurous, fit girls. But running errands in this town is also basically guaranteed potential. Of those three dates I mentioned yesterday, I met them like this:

1- girl in elevator when I dropped off some paperwork at the property manager.
2- waitress who was flirting with me when I was out grabbing lunch with a buddy.
3- girl who was working a booth where I bought some shit at the Farmer's Market.

Thus, my theory about daygame being VERY location dependent holds true, methinks.

Off to bed.

Today's day off didn't turn out quite as exciting as I thought it would.

I woke up and just kind of relaxed for a while. Drank some coffee. Surfed the Internet for a while. Chatted online with a buddy.

Around 11am I walked over to a nearby surfshop to buy a new board. The walk over there took me past this new brunch/cafe spot that is getting all kinds of hype right now. It's new. There's a constant one-hour wait. It's posh. The whole mimosas and brunch scene. Even today, at 11am on a Thursday, there was a crowd gathering outside the door.

I was curious so I just stepped in to see what all the excitement was about. Asked the hostess to see the menu. That was probably my best shot at a new prospect all day as she was giggling at my stupid little comments, making small talk, looking me deep in the eye. She was sexy too. But just stuck my finger up my ass instead - two of her coworkers were standing right there the whole time. Kind of uncomfortable.

Looking back on it right now though, I'm realizing there's an easy way to play that (which is the entire value in dissecting these little interactions, now isn't it). In nightgame, something I always do when there are "friendly onlookers" like this is acknowledge one of them in a playful way with something like this "Hey, I'm Daniel. What's your name?... Oh, it's Amanda, nice to meet you. So Amanda, I have a huge crush on your friend here. What do you think? Do I have a shot?"

Of course, the girl I'm trying to bang can hear the whole thing and they'll always look at each other and laugh and bask in the shock and awe of the whole thing. And then I'll just turn to the girl with a sly smirk on my face like "Yep, we's gon fuck."

It works pretty often. And I'm sure it would have had a good chance of working there. Just requires one to be uninhibited and in the moment. Noted.

Anyway, I left there, bought my new board, and came home for a bit. I was gonna surf but it was rainy, cold, and windy so I just did a few things around the house. Then I went to the grocery store.

Not much in the way of talent in the store but checking out I saw a decent looking girl get into one of the lines so I just got behind her and started talking. She turned around and talked a little bit but she was a pretty firm YELLOW, and not nearly as hot as I thought she was going to be when I saw her from afar, so I just let the convo die out and started talking to the guy behind me instead.

After that, I went to the climbing gym. Brought a buddy of mine for the first time and I think he really enjoyed it. Introduced myself to 2-3 guys who were there too. Unfortunately, literally zero babes. It's been hit or miss the 4-5 times I've been there. Oh well, we had fun.

Came home around 8pm and that was basically my day.

Some other random notes:

--I got taken to school on high-value networking here at my building. The other day I was sitting in the hot tub alone. Relaxed. Loving life. An older guy comes over, gets in. I immediately say hi, I'm new, and so on. We chat for a bit. Turns out he some powerful retired venture capitalist. Lives in the penthouse suite at our building (probably at least a $5 million home, maybe FAR more for all I know). Meeting people like this is one of the reasons I decided to live in this building (hopefull a sexy girl or two lives here as well but as far as I can tell it's mostly 40+ and above, and wealthy). Anyway, we chat for a bit, I tell him some bit about myself and after just a couple of minutes he says "I'm in a hurry, but later this evening, write down your contact info and your unit number and slide it under my door. I'll be in contact." Think about how high-status that move is. The dude knows he's a fucking heavy hitter. But he also probably knows I have some sort of thing going for me as I'm a young bachelor living in the same building as him. But he knew I'd go out of my way to extend my information (and if I didn't, he probably wouldn't give two fucks). So anyway, today I get a one sentence email from him "Daniel, I enjoyed talking with you." That was it. Hahaha. Now it's up to me to like invite him over for coffee or whatever, and you can be damn sure I will.

--One of my best girl friends called me today, wasted, and was like "I'm sad you've never taken me to the Bone Yard." Not news to me but funny nonetheless.

--Ten minutes ago I got a text from a chick who's number I pulled at a bar the other night. "Are you out?" My reply: "No. At home drinking a glass of wine. You should come say hi." Now we wait. I'm not drinking any wine right now either. But if she replies in the next ten minutes before I go to bed, I will certainly open one haha.

--Here's some "friend game" that's in development now. So a few years ago I was acquaintances with this guy at my gym. He's a tall, jacked Asian with long hair so I'll just call him AsianAdonis. Basically, he looks like a badass samurai (covered in tats too). We weren't super close. Would just shoot the shit at the gym. Then I moved and he actually went on a year-long journey around the world. Anyway, about 2 months ago, I he posted on FB that he was in my town, so I messaged him and was like "Yo, let's grab lunch while you're here, want to hear your travel stories." So we ate lunch and it turned out he was moving back here too, right around the same time I was. When I got back here, I texted him and we met up for lunch again. We just have a lot in common. We both hustle for work. We both like to bang chicks. We both like the social scene. Working out. So last week, I invited him to some networking event and introduced him to a couple of key people, including one guy in the same industry as him. And tomorrow he's taking me to some happy hour that's like all young professional types. I think that's a pretty straight-forward, easy example of how to progress a friendship as an adult. Hang out, invite the person to stuff you think they'll be interested in, find common goals, and just keep escalating it further.

My social "arms" are already spreading out, touching people all over. Soon I'll start uniting them all with pre-parties at this dope apartment of mine, with days BBQing on the beach, and so on. The momentum is already building. Now I just need to friend-zone a few chicks.

Probably taking tomorrow off from work too, although I may cave and do a few hours before that happy hour. First things first though, since it was rainy today, I'm surfing my face off in the AM.

Missed a few days, some notes...

--The girl I brought home from the date and made out with last week has gone a bit cold. I suspected that might happen. She just graduated college and is moving to San Francisco in like 4 weeks. We had such a fast and deep bond I thought that might happen... plus, she's been out of town the last week so the momentum has faded. I may try to get her out one more time but if she has to be convinced to come see me again, after the great time we had the last time, I'm just kind of like, well fuck it then.

--I met a sexy-ass yoga instructor in the checkout line t the grocery store on Saturday. I was riding my bike and she drove, so after a few minutes chatting she actually offered to put my bike in the back of her SUV and drove me home. I told her to come inside the apartment and we ended up just shooting the shit for a bit. I didn't make any moves, but invited her over last night for "hot tub + wine" together. She came over. We crushed a bottle of wine. Made out a bunch but she was pretty firm about needing more trust and time with a guy. I have a radar from when that's legit, which this was, so I just backed off. I was escalating pretty hard though. It was good. She was super turned on. Moaning and getting real into it. I think we'll have pretty epic sexual chemistry together so I may be a bit patient with her. She's one of the best kissers I've had in a long time.

--Saturday night I was out with a couple of buddies and got into a nice interaction with this 22-year-old dime. She was all over me, stroking my hair, telling me I reminded her of a male model, etc... But she ended up having a boyfriend and seemed like she was just enjoying the flirtation. She added me on IG though and was like "Well, if he and I ever break up all you have to do is DM me. That's how he got me." A little further investigation reveals they just graduation college together and she moved back here to her home town and he moved to Oregon. So I think they're on the slippery slope towards ending. I'll keep my eye on her. She's dope.

--At the gym on Sunday I had a nice, long chat with a sexy trainer with GIANT fake tits. She seemed pretty captivated. A slow-play situation. I'll let my Social Blitzkrieg of the gym continue. Just meeting all the hot girls, being friendly with all the dudes, appearing to know everyone, being friendly, all that. It snowballs but it's nice to start developing the prospect list early.

That was about it. There's probably more but I want to go to bed. Back to regular daily updates tomorrow.

Tuesday 06/14/2016

Kind of a run-of-the-mill day. I had some quick turnaround revisions on some of the work stuff I turned in last week so that absorbed my attention for most of the day.

I woke up around 9am because I was up a bit late last night. That's far too late, especially for a weekday so I'm committing to getting to bed earlier tonight. Take it one day at a time. But I want to be up earlier because it means I finish my work earlier which means I have more hours of daylight to enjoy the water.

I'll adjust for dates and other social stuff that happens during the week but even in a week where I go out once or twice during the week, that's the minority situation and can easily be accommodated. For example, it looks like a pretty standard evening schedule for me is shaping up to be something like this:

Monday - Lay low @ home (but there are two bars that have good "industry" nights on Mondays, so occasionally that).
Tuesday - Lay low @ home
Wednesday - Law low @ home
Thursday - Happy Hour or Date
Friday - Whatever
Saturday - Whatever
Sunday - Surprisingly good happy hour day or good for dates

So even in a packed week, it shouldn't be too hard to maintain better sleeping habits. I think this mix also gives me the alone time I need to recharge and do my own thing, which I find necessary. I get stressed out if I don't get that chance to be alone and reflect. Particularly in the evenings.

Anyway, that's a long tangent basically saying I started my day way too late today and with the unexpected work, left me feeling moody for a good part of the day.

By around 4:30pm I was so sick of feeling that way, I decided I was gonna cut my losses for the day, hit the grocery store and then just recoup for the rest of the day.

Despite that, I did manage to meet another couple people at the co-working office earlier in the day. One nice girl who seems pretty friendly and outgoing and another bro who is a hardcore surfer, which obviously gave us an immediate rapport and led to a soft agreement to hit the water together sometime. Both these two are raised here, so they have a lot of social ties and roots, which is always a plus. I was happy to have met both of them.

So I left the cowork spot and hit the grocery store for a few things. I haven't yet had a chance to shop for a car so I'm biking everywhere. This means I can only get a few groceries at a time, which is a pain. The silver lining is usually there are chicks, which there were today...

--I first noticed this girl as I was going through the produce section. She kind of looked up at me as I passed and then quickly looked down. A few minutes later, however, she flashed me a huge smile. I smiled back... and then just kept walking like a moron. I remember writing about this sort of situation a lot when I was first starting to hit on girls in situations like this: you have to have a hairpin trigger finger. Day game is filled with fleeting moments where you get a sliver of an opportunity. So you have to always be ready to react and say something in those quick, little moments. I'm getting that back but as this proved, still not quite the second nature it once was. Shame too because she was a babe.

--In the checkout line I get in line behind a tiny, tiny girl with beautiful black hair. I don't see her face when I get in line but from behind she was great so I went with that checkout. She's unloading her shit onto the conveyor belt and I see she has bagels. So I just say "Are those bagels any good? My parents are both from NYC so I was raised on the best bagels and I'm always a little unsure of these store bought ones." She opened right up, first talking about bagels, then asking me about myself, if I'm from NYC, etc... Questions = interest so this would have been great but she wasn't quite as hot as I thought she was gonna be so I just let the conversation fizzle. These dumb little situational openers in day game make things really easy.

--Right after that, I'm walking out of the store and there's a really sexy Asian girl right in front of me. I had seen her shopping a few minutes before but balked. Like I mentioned with the first girl, I simply missed that sliver of opportunity when we were in the same aisle. But I suppose the gods of poon were giving me a shot at redemption by placing her right her on the way out. Through her bag, I could see she had like 3 things of chicken stock. So I just said "You making a soup?" She way like "Yes! I am!" but then she was veering to the left and I was going right and she just kind of beelined it that way. I don't take that as a rejection because she was genuinely enthusiastic in her reply. My take is this, and it's another thing I noticed when I first started the daytime shenanigans: the social expectation when a stranger says "Hi" or something like that is just to say "Hi" back and then move along. Think about it. Whenever you're in public and a strangers's like "Hey there, how are you?" you probably say "Good!" and then just keep walking. What I noticed is you have to immediately do something to PREVENT the girl from going with that normal momentum. Again, it's a fleeting moment type of thing that requires you to act FAST. I think I had a second to do that here, but didn't. It's not hard either. "Cool, what kind of soup? I made a great soup last night actually" would have been perfect here. Having that quick reaction ingrained is the hard part.

After all that, I came home and just relaxed at my apartment's pool. I probably should have surfed but I was kind of beat and just kicking it in the hot tub was a very appealing way to blow off some of the steam from earlier in the day. I met another guy who lives here. Older, retired dude. We hit it off and he offered to take me to a nearby, classy restaurant that just opens where he knows the manager. That could be a great connection as the place is very close, great logistically, and the kind of SPAM that's great for dates. Knowing the manager and getting "dapped" up when entering with a date would make it deadly.

So I suppose the lesson of the day is ACT FAST IN DAYGAME. Nothing groundbreaking but it is a habit. Now that I'm more "active" all these things are falling together very fast. I suspect I'm going to pick up some crazy momentum soon.

Tuesday 06/15/2016

I really like the way today unfolded. I'm always experimenting with the order that I put my day together. Once I buy a car I'll have even more opportunity to do that but this entire year, doing my "active" time for the day first thing has always left me in far better spirits than putting it off until afternoon.

It worked like this today...

True to my word yesterday, I woke up much earlier today at 7:30am. I don't see the point in going much earlier than 7am unless I have a specific reason so this is close to how I want it.

Another thing I noticed the other day is that I've let my "routine" daily time expand a lot. So this morning I was making an effort to get up, have some coffee, get cleaned up, etc... as well as do a bit of morning visualization and light meditation... all in under an hour. Almost made it this morning, but was a few minutes later. Had to shit.

In any case, I was in the water and surfing early today. Waves are still up so it was a great session. I certainly was feeling better over my last outing. Sadly, whenever the swell gets decent sized, there aren't many girls out, which was the case today. Coming in I had one shot, a sexy girl getting in the water right as I was getting out. Like yesterday, one of those hair trigger moments. I missed it. Would have been as simple as "Water feels great today, huh?"

The reason I write these out, in that detail, is to ingrain that habit. It's worked in the past and it'll work again now.

So I headed home, got changed, and got to the coworking space around 12:30pm and worked until around 6:30pm. I felt much less stressed today which I attribute to getting in the water beforehand.

Now here I am, just resting for the remainder of the night. Once I get a little bit of a rotation of girls going, this would be a perfect night to get one over here to bang for a bit and then head to bed. Like I said, it's a structure to a pretty damn good day.

Got a lot of stuff on my mind about game, social circles, time management, life... everything. I'll have to table it for now as I don't want to be sitting here typing for the next hour. It'll come.

Not a whole lot to report on because Wednesday afternoon my eye started to bother me. By the evening it was tearng and completely red.

Pink eye.

So I spent most of the day on Thursday in a waiting room to see a nurse to get some Rx drops. Today (Friday), it's much improved but still red and itchy.

The only little bit of "game" worth mentioning was this morning at the gym.

I was in the middle of a little deadlift circuit. A SEXY Asian comes up and motions if she can take some of the weights on the platform I was using. I'm on a timer so I just grunt and nod yes.

After I finished, she was in the rack next to me so I went up and said "Hey I wasn't trying to blow you off there, I was just on a timer."

Now, I know this girl is a trainer. I've seen her training clients there, so I knew she'd respect that. She was like "Oh, I totally get it." I joked about her thinking I'm a "fucking asshole" she laughed and then we had a quick, but good 1 min conversation.

Then I just walked off to continue my workout. I didn't ask for her name or linger or anything. She's there almost every time I've been in, so I know I'll see her again and I think I left a pretty powerful impression on her.

I think this will have potential. There was just something about her body language in that moment that told me I played that entire thing correctly and she was intrigued. For me, it's just a instance where I feel the power and indifference coming back. And that's the key to game.

Practically, even if nothing happens with her, knowing the trainers is one of the best moves to pull at the gym. They know everyone and knowing them makes you look like an "insider." And now I know two of them, and I've only been coming in here for a week and a half.

A big and fun update is long overdue.

So last Friday evening one of my buddies introduced me to a girl who was here for a week on vacation.

That same night, I fucked her brains out.

Then... she ended up staying with me for the whole next week before returning home on Friday night (i.e. a full week).

For all intents and purposes, she was my girlfriend for a week and by some sort of non-conventional use of the word, we were in love. This girl was fucking awesome. Sexy as hell. Great in bed. Laid back, patient, understanding. And 100% - no, make that 150% - devoted to doing everything she could to make me happy.

On top of all that, she was insanely cute. She'd scurry around my apartment, giggling, smiling, hopping into my lap.

Oh, and she's also a sports massage doctor or something, so I was getting grade-A massages each day.

Let's start by talking about the first night, since I imagine that's instructive. Then, can move into some of the other, more introspective stuff.

-------

It's Friday night. AsianAdonis texts me and says we should go out. I'd also been texting back and forth with my buddy TheDirector, so I tell him to come over too. What he doesn't tell me is he's bringing this Canadian girl too (let's call her TheBunny)... who is a SEXY Chinese girl here on vacation.

They all show up at my apartment. I'm full-on attracted the moment she walks in. But I just assume TheDirector is going to get with her so I don't really pay her any mind. Of course, that turned out to not be the case but when friends are involved, it's best to be cautious and know the deal.

As a sidenote: she'd later tell me she was full-on attracted to me at first and then, even more so because the first thing she noticed was that my apartment was clean and SMELLED nice. Don't be a slob.

Anyway, we all head out. Remember, I'm not even hitting on her at this point because I don't know what the deal is. TheDirector has game so he could be trying to get with her. So I'm just kind of hanging out at the bar, idle chit-chat with girls here and there and literally talking to TheBunny about the girls I find cute, telling her she has to be my wingwoman, describing to her the type of girls I'm into, etc...

She's super chill about all of it.

At the same time, I'm not being "cold" towards her or anything like that. Quite the opposite, actually. Fun, playful, and slightly flirty.

Eventually, TheDirector is hitting on another girl. Devoting his entire time towards her. So I figure maybe I can start focusing on TheBunny. The thing is, TheDirector is a little dramatic. He's a great guy, very genuine, but just slightly volatile. So I don't ask him straight-up, which with 99% of my boys would be the best bet.

Instead, I'm still playing my cards close to the chest, but getting a little bit more flirty with TheBunny and paying her a bit more attention.

Maybe an hour goes by. I continue to just hang out with AsianAdonis and TheBunny as TheDirector goes all in on his girl.

The bar we're at closes (it has an early close, midnight I think). AsianAdonis goes home. TheDirector comes to me and TheBunny with his girl and says we should go to another bar. Now I'm 90% sure he won't care.

We head to the next bar. Outside and young, SEXY girl starts talking to me, brushing up against met, etc... I play a little hot-cold with her but make it seem like I'm more interested in TheBunny. This drives that girl crazy. I've seen her twice before on the social circuit, in like the last month, so I'm sure I'll see her again and she'll remember I was pre-selected and hard-to get. Just a little insurance policy in the midst of this adventure.

We go inside and TheDirector disappears with his girl (good isolation game, yes?).

I decide it's time to get the ball into play.

TheBunny is leaning against the wall. We're having idle fluff talk. It's 100% evident she's into me. So I put my right palm on the wall, next to her left ear. Look her straight in the eyes. Now I lean to the other ear. I'm not touching her, but my body is now less than an inch from hers and my lips are ever-so-slightly brushed up against her ears.

In other words... I've lit the TENSION fuse... and now I drop the nuke: "If I wasn't worried that TheDirector would get upset, I'd be all over you right now."

Her response: "He doesn't matter. We're all adults and I know what I want."

Me: "What's that?"

Her: [palms go gently onto my chest] You."

And now, as I like to say, we're playing the same game together.

As if by some stroke of intervention from the Divine Lords of Poon, another girl who I number-closed a few weeks ago, but who has been IMPOSSIBLE to get out, walks by us at this moment. I catch her eye. She stops in her tracks and comes up and says hi. Again, I give her a bit of cold, but just a hint of eye contact that says "You're next." We talk for one minute and she excuses her self. I'll hit her up with week and see if that little exchange lit her loins up.

Now I bounce TheBunny from this spot on the wall directly to the bar. Movement = Same Night Lay. NEVER FORGET THIS. Why? Because unless you plan on fucking her in the exact spot you met her with everyone watching, she needs to be comfortable FOLLOWING you to wherever you LEAD her. So lead her lots of insignificant places first.

At the bar, I get us waters. Go back to bar so I'm in the relaxed, non-chalant position. We talk more. Get to know each other better. Touching.

Pretty standard pre-pull things.

I decide to move one more time. Tell her we should go find TheDirector. This will also be my test to let him see me and her in a much closer, more intimate dynamic. We find him. He's cool. Doesn't give a shit. He still has his girl. I guess he was just delivering me a tourist girl that he'd met. He's a generous wingman quite often so I guess my cautiousness was a little excessive.

Whatever, he's a good friend so better to be safe than sorry.

We all decide we should leave back to my apartment. So we get a cab.

Back at my apartment, TheDirector wastes no time. Within minutes, he's pulled his girl back into my guest room and I'm alone with TheBunny.

At this point, I don't need to do anything really. I just grab her hand and pull her into my bedroom. There's no resistance, no obstacles. As has always been the case with direct-escalation game. You don't have to deal with any of that shit you get when you're pull is something veiled like "Let's go watch these hilarious YouTube videos at my place."

Nope. My pull was basically "I'm gonna fuck you rotten" so she knew what my plans were.

In fact, she would later tell me that after I stepped on the gas at the bar, all she could think was (and this is word-for-word): "Oh my God, what am I in for?"

She said I was "animalistic but sweet" and that combination, with the added unknowns and expectation, got her incredibly turned on. To be clear: she knew she was safe and that I was trustworthy, but the thought of basically being desired uncontrollably set her off.

I think you can guess where this goes. We went from zero to rough, dominant sex in about two minutes. She orgasmed non-stop and then basically collapsed when we were done. First thing the next morning, we did it again.

Now it's Saturday morning and we're sort of basking in this wild connection we have. She's here for another week and I'm feeling spontaneous, plus I really like this girl, so I tell her to stay with me for the week. She's all-in.

And that was basically how it unfolded from there. We spent the entire week eating out, falling for one another, having crazy sex, having deep conversations, cuddling, etc...

She was great. Her disposition was just pure joy and happiness. What a great, great girl.

By week's end, we were full on in it. But she had to go home so beared it and she went home. Early in the week, Tuesday maybe, I knew that pain would come and I knew we'd have no choice but to yank the Bandaid off.

And it sucked but I'm 100% happy I didn't let that fear keep me from diving headlong into that. I don't think it's a stretch to say that we were in love.

For me personally, this experience helped clear out a lot of the baggage I've been carrying around since breaking up with my GF about 18 months ago. It was the first time I really opened myself up to a girl, in all the different ways: emotionally, sexually, physically, mentally. I was constantly making internal challenges to myself when those mental scripts started playing. Feeling reluctant to share XYZ experience with her? Just do it. Not willing to be open and honest about ABC? Just do it.

On top of that, she opened my eyes to a lot of the things that were problems between me and my ex. Stuff that I've always been like "Maybe I should have compromised on that? Or maybe we could have worked that out." In reality, they were just clashes of values and lifestyles and living with this girl for a week showed me that I wasn't wrong about any of it (or that my GF wasn't wrong). We just weren't a match. That's given me a fair amount of acceptance.

I could go on and on, but just suffice it to way that I think in 8 days I was basically able to "hack" through what I've been trying to accomplish for the better part of 18 months. Which is accepting the past and being open to the future. This girl was special. She had a way of putting me at ease, making me comfortable, and just making me feel loved.

And I'll finish by saying this: if you're reading this is you think I'm being "beta" I have a mental exercise for you.

Here it is: Thursday morning, she and I were just cuddled up on the couch and I basically told her all of these things. How grateful I was I met her. How the experience had been transformative for me. How I thought she was an amazing girl who deserves the best.

Was that beta?

Maybe, in that exact moment, it was.

But what about within the dynamic of this entire thing?

When you consider some of these things, which I believe are "alpha" and show a man who is strong, secure, and dedicated to HIMSELF, is it still beta?

--I told her she could stay with me but on the condition that I a) have things to do and will not brush them aside for her and b) that I'm the type of person who needs some quiet, time alone to themselves each day, that it was nothing personal, but if she took it so, or made me feel guilty for taking that time, I would not allow her to stay with me. Of course, she respected that and even encouraged it.

--Basically everywhere we went, I was constantly spontaneous and a challenge. Playing with her. Giving her dominant physical contact in public (like firm hand on thigh while sitting). Slapping her ass randomly. She commented that I have this mix of naughty-and-nice and it was addicting because she never knew which one she was going to get.

--I never supplicated to her, bended to her, or did anything with her I didn't want to do. But at the same time, I wasn't dick, I was willing to discuss things, etc...

--By being open, sharing my unrestricted thoughts and being clear about my boundaries, I was in a position of power and strength.

--And finally, sexually, for all intents and purposes I "owned" her. For example, that emotional discussion happened on Thursday morning. Wednesday night, she was TIED TO MY FUCKING BEDFRAME and I was doing whatever the hell I wanted to her. I fucked her until her body was having involuntary convulsions. That's a position of not only complete physical submission, but complete trust as well. A girl has to trust you 100% to let you put in her such a vulnerable position. And that's love. It's respect. It's dominance. A girl doesn't fall head-over-heels, give-it-all-up in love like that for a guy she thinks is weak or "beta." Those feelings of complete surrender are reserved for a MAN. And you can remind her of that by telling her "You are completely helpless right now. I can do whatever I want to you. And there's nothing you can do to stop it." On top of that, by that point, I also had a fair amount of "hypnotic" control over her orgasms. I don't know a thing about hypnotism but I know that the way I dirty talk before and during a girl's orgasm eventually gives me the ability to a) tell her exactly when to cum and b) make it so she can't stop cumming (hence the involuntary leg convulsions). She even told me that I got her to the point where all I needed to do was put her in a physically submissive position and tell her to cum and she could (i.e. not even fucking or eating her out).

So look at all that and tell me, was sharing my full, unedited emotions with her beta? I don't think so. But I also know this: even if it was, I'd still do it because it feels better to open yourself up and be emotionally FREE then to keep it inside and to act in a way you don't want to because you think it's better for the relationship. It's NOT. You just have to know how to wield the weapons of "soft, relationship game" in an effective way: true to yourself, true to your boundaries, free and open as a show of strength, and of course, physical/emotional/sexual dominance.

OK, I think that's enough, it's July 4th and there's fun to be had... But what a great experience and what an incredible girl. A special girl. They come few and far between but for me at least, the few diamonds in the rough are what make it all worthwhile.

Hahahaha awesome, happy for you man.

An observation: you met the girl through social circle

Seemed pretty straightforward and easy. I think the takeaway for me was the tension spike moment leaned up against the wall.

Good shit!

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Thanks and yeah, it was social circle. I've probably hooked up with more girls because of TheDirector than anyone else I know (and if he's not #1, he's definitely at the top). He's always got new people he's hanging out with.

The trouble with him, is they are always NEW people. Like I mentioned, he can be a bit volatile and I think he tires of friendships easily. I've known him for about 4.5 years know and me and one other guy (the guy who introduced us) are literally the only two people I've known TheDirector to still be friends with through that time span.

So he's great for influx of chicks but what I'm going after, the sort of self-sustaining, self-growing social circle that's built on recurring momentum... I'm still kind of starting from scratch there as none of the handful of friends I have here do that kind of thing.
I think guys feel like there has to be some natural opening or progression to start escalating. I don't think so and I think that's why so many guys struggle with it. They're waiting and calculating and observing, which effectively takes them out of the passion/desire and puts them into a pensive headspace.

That's why I've always felt verbal "nukes" are so great. The way I see it, even if a girl is not giving me overt signals, if she's spending one-on-one time with me, either on a date or isolated in the first meeting, she's into me. Which means it's time to add a sexual dynamic. And if you simply say something like "You know... this is a great conversation we're having... and I can tell you're a really smart, driven girl... which I love... but honestly, all I can think about right now is how hard it is for me to NOT kiss you right now." You need no other opening other than the fact that she's there with you.

Another thing I'll add, is this NEVER stops. It's like a perpetual first date. This goes back to the naughty-and-nice dynamic I mentioned above. I'm ALWAYS doing shit like this, even after we've fucked. I'll randomly be in the elevator with a girl and just decide that I'm going to throw her against the wall and heavily make out with her and then walk away like nothing happened once the doors open. Or I'll grab her and slap her ass. Or just push her into a wall and smell her and tell her she's sexy. That's a pretty good way to keep things interesting for a long time.

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Onto other thoughts. I spent a lot of time today daydreaming about what's next and planning my priorities.

The truth is, with everything I've accomplished, there's a wanderlust that I still have not satiated. If I go back to my earliest days of fantasizing about what the life I wanted to DESIGN AND BUILD would look like, there were two parts.

One is what I'm doing now. Location independence. Own hours and schedule. Life at the beach. Kind of the perfect, ideal, perpetual day.

But there was also a part where I was spending long periods of time (up to a few months) in Southeast Asia/South America/Caribbean/Mediterranean... and I haven't quite gotten there yet.

Financially, I could do it right now. It would detract from my investments a little bit, but still would be OK (and that's irrelevant because more $$$ is on the way, almost certainly).

It's more about focus and productivity. I don't work a lot right now by any means (probably around 25-30hrs per week) but the work I do is intense, it requires focus, and my productivity suffers if I'm not in a good daily routine.

So I guess my main concern is if I take 8 weeks to go to say... Tahiti... can I stay productive? Does my work suffer? Can I still get all my shit done? How severe are my "switching costs"?

Honestly, I don't know. I'm in a pretty intense period of business development right now which is laying the groundwork for the next 3-5 years to be incredibly lucrative at the same level of effort.

On the one hand, if all that works out, in another 18 months, I may not have to even worry about work. I may just take like 6-12 months off to travel and bum around tropical beaches for a while before returning to life "as normal."

But on the other hand, there's a big part of me that's like, why don't I just plan a big 2 month trip for sometime in the next 6-8 months and see what happens? By the end of this year, I think this business development stuff will be taken care of and there will be a little bit less to worry about.

That was kind of a revelation to me today. So I think I'm going to look into that. Tahiti is probably pretty nice in January

I think a big part of this is I'm finally feeling settled into my new home and life (been almost 6 weeks now!) and so naturally, I've started to think about what's next. I'm not the type of person to get into a holding pattern so really expanding my life in new ways (social, leisure, travel, hobbies, etc...) is the next logical place for me to place my time and efforts. What experiences and adventures can I plan for and work towards?

You've worked so hard to make that $$$, enjoying the spoils ain't a bad thing.

In college I was a residential advisor, and I was floating an idea around in my brain to bike across the country with a couple friends.

I wasn't sure whether I could / should do it or not... I didn't know how to fix a flat tire, this was before GPS so it would have to be my paper maps... I could get run over by a car, I could get kidnapped, I could get buttfucked by a bear, a million different things could happen, and my parents were freaking out about it.

Then, I came back from classes one day and I got a phone call from residential housing. One of my residents and close friends, a guy named Evan, who was recently engaged, had died in a car crash that morning.

That day I decided that I had to do the trip.

Life is short, man.

Even if your money / business takes a bump in the road because of it, I'd say it's worth it.

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