@Kasabi

Ima step it up. No posting here until I've at least #number closed.

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*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

How are things going?

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Journal/Blog: journal-little-panda-vt135329.html

Tweeby man, I really respect you, and all the work that you've done and written down has inspired me to make my own journal, keep on keepin on! I know you can do this, stop depriving the world from yourself bro!

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"A king does not look to peasants to tell him he's a king, he looks at the crown on his head."

The purpose of this journal is to work through your strengths, weaknesses, successes, and failures. You did this quite well with your work life.

I'm back, sadly with not much to say in terms of my love life.

I've got, probably the best job I've ever had in my life. Well, one or two from being the best. It's a wonderful setup and I just have to make sure all my goals are met. Slowly the team is being built.

I've been to a few places by myself, France was a great experience, I would like to go to Spain next year. I taking a Japanese course, it's brilliant. I fell out with a few friends and lost my temper. Partly, it is my own fault I don't deny that.

Everyday, I wake up and try to tell myself to ask about other people's lives. It's difficult when all I feel is anger. Some days are good some days are bad. Ultimately I am hoping to focus on bettering the lives of others and seeing the benefits that come with.

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

Okay, so it is time to wipe the slate clean and try again because obviously whatever I did before wasn't working or wasn't done effectively.

At the moment I am very happy with my job/career. So until something goes really wrong I don't need to change this. I am following through with my deadlines and making sure communication is a must within the team. Additionally, I'm NOT going to post any work related crap in this journal. As Kasabi would say, this is a 'motherfucking PUA forum' so let's keep it to pickup.

I would like to move out, or at least get the money to move out. That is my immediate short-term goal. Perhaps a slightly higher wage would afford this at the moment. It still needs looking at.

I need to make my own meals everyday. This is not a happening, perhaps three times a week. This is hopeless.

I have started a Japanese course, the short term goal is to try and be normal when chatting to the other people. Odd sometimes I feel a bit paranoid but then again I don't know. It's just in my head. I also need to start some Salsa dancing again if I can. So I need to find out about this.

I need to carry on with my Gym routine and join in lessons.

But most importantly, pickup.

This has to come before everything else. So first thing after work I will concentrate on opening in the mall.

There is a girl who works in the petrol station. She is pretty cute. I would like to ask her out to coffee. Purely for the sake of just getting it 'off my chest.'

My plan is to warm up by being more flirty with girls in the mall. Time is a running out as they say.

End of Year goals.

Number close!

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

You're probably right. Maybe it's time for another approach. You seem to work well with strategy/plans/schedules with your work life so I thought you'd be able to translate these habits towards PU. . . but if it doesn't work, it doesn't work. Let's start from scratch with the basics:

1. Move out? Are you still living with your folks? If so, move out immediately. Call up all your friends and start networking for roommates. You can always find something.

2. Do you have a bunch of openers, chat topics, and date ideas on the tip of your tongue? Do whatever it takes to own a few of these things.

DO ALL YOUR WORK prior to chatting up the petro-girl. By this, I mean unload all the little things out of your brain. Pay the bills, make the phone calls, finish your tasks from your job, etc. . . All these little things, unless unloaded from your brain, add up to distractions. If it's only 1 email you need to send this is not a big deal. But if you've got 10 things you need to do, you'll be distracted... and might even make an excuse to think, "No, I'll do it later when I have the time." There is no other time. The time is now because you already finished all the other things before now..." - Sounds good?

And if you're going to do this, let's commit to it. This is one of those piss-in-your-pants situations. I must have brought this up to perhaps 4 or 5 other members in the past. You've already spent years on this so you know time alone won't make it any easier. It doesn't matter if you stumble, trip, stutter, cry, or shit in your pants. You open the girl. You chat with the girl. If you start getting asthma and feel like passing out, fine. You better be passing out while trying tell her, "Hey, there's this bar where a monkey....." PLOP! This is where we are now. Cry, stutter, or if she's looking at you like you are a freak, that's fine with you and me. Breathe in, breathe out... "So, how's Sunday for you?" - Get this done. The goal is not a "yes". The goal is to go through the motions and complete one honest and sincere pick up effort.

Thank you so much Kasabi.

Your contributions are always insightful. I know why this is so important because it is the 'process' rather than the outcome which is of benefit here. Kinda like 'monkey mind' I guess this is what you are hammering home.

You are actually one of the reasons why I decided to pick a Japanese course to study for this semester, as I've become more interested in the country's culture and philosophies - especially bhuddishm. Although I have not posted in over a year I have been secretly popping to catch up on your insightful replies to other people's thread and I have read your contributions in regards to the '5 languages.' I guess it might cross into the realms of cyber stalking LOL.

The day before yesterday I went out with my pal, and I had a mega opening session. I must have opened at least 20 sets, and I found a good dose of alcohol and immediate action (less thinking) works OK for me. I somehow managed to number close, but on review the next day, she typed in stars for some numbers so it wasn't even a real number! Oh well no sweat there LOL.

I do get extremely nervous when I set myself a goal to open one girl like this one at the petrol station where I have already spoken to her many times before. Perhaps this is the problem, but I am GOING to make myself do this one even if I have to hunt for her around the shop.

In regards, to moving out I don't have any friends that could help me here. Most are moved in with their partners. So I've been looking at the rooms to let, I guess I could move in with a a stranger in shared accommodation, it might be good for me. The plan is to fully examine all my expenses and do a whole two weeks without any help from my parents in terms of cooking, washing and covering any other bills they normally do. This will give a real good idea of what I can afford.

In the mean time, I've dropped more or less everything, GYM, to go sarging in the towns. I'm just trying to be more direct. I do believe that even running up to a girl and asking her out for coffee on the spot would be beneficial to me.... Simply because I NEED to go through the process of doing it.

I know you say that we as humans are more responsible for our actions them we like to believe... And there seems to be a strange disconnect in how I can organise my work life yet I can't seem to follow through with my love/personal life.

Perhaps I'm so used to being alone I quite don't know what to do if I was to ever meet that special person and experience some happiness. Anyway... All I know is I know NOTHING.

So I'm going to try anything and EVERYTHING.

Thank you for changing my life and hopefully the lives of others here.

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

Thanks Da, we got listings... Not quite sure it is same as craiglist. Glad your OK and doing just fine. I see you got a long term GF now congrats.

OK went out yesterday. Dressed pretty smart. We went to a cocktail bar and I opened got a few deer in headlights, some girls chatted back. I guess I have to be more flirty with the opener and not so clinical.

Then we hit the student uni. Was quite amusing, it takes a long time to get warmed up and you start questioning all the openers in your head. To be honest it is just about you body language and how you deliver the line. Had some guy trying to dance with me, funny I assumed he was gay but he has a cute friend, so I just laughed and just went with it and ended up with us both grinding up against a girl(his mate) as she was sandwiched between us. Bit awkward I smiled at her but her face didn't seem to reciprocate.

Opened a few other girls, students are a tough crowd you need to have good energy. Then as the night was drawing to a close they only open one room. This I think is probably the best time to pull. Everyone is in close proximity and you're just looking for an IOI then you must move in. Thing is it is so difficult to read sometimes. There was this one girl who was litterally hanging around my mate all night and when he moved in she walked off. It wasn't a creepy approach or anything.

Now, I thought I was getting some IOI's but I kinda dropped some water on this girls leg and she wasn't too happy. She was petite and I thought maybe... but I guess not. Some fat asian girl (5/10)seemed to be trying dance near me with her friend at the end. I'm pretty sure she was interested because she was doing the bumping near me.

I should definitely react to those situations. She was OK and need some kinda of experience. I was just thinking 'follow through.'

Planning a train trip to another town this morning but still quite hung over. Objectives direct compliments and direct lines of interest. I might just ask if they got a boyfriend.... Why? Simply because I need to get used to the process. I might choke, it might go 100% pear shaped, but it's the process.

The more I think the less it works. And I need to open early.

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

You might be on to something here. I'm a gay dude magnet. I've been bought flowers, hit on, etc. . . I suppose if you look at this negatively, you could say that maybe we look like f^gs... but I bet we draw this energy because we are approachable, positive, and attractive... I am sticking with this story.
Close to you is an IOI... so approach.

1. It's bad policy to open only those who give you IOI's, in spite of what many on this forum will tell you.

2. Partying ≠ efficiency.

3. You are not qualified to read "ioi's" You will talk yourself out of it. You will read one hair fix instead of one elbow pointing or one butt shake instead of a foot direction your way and you'll tell yourself, "maybe not." Forget this BS. When I used to run it with some of my favorite wings, we'd tell each other, "You go this way and I'll go that way." That's it. He'd hit every decent looking girl(s) on his way to the bar and I'd hit every decent looking girl(s) on the way to the bar from the other side of the room. Sure, you could do a quick smile to see if she smiles back. You could do a quick open to see if she responds. Either way, YOU HIT IT first. Waiting around or walking around the bar 50 times is the game of the non-gamers.
Again... hit it, hit it, hit it. Dropping water isn't an opener. Guessing she is interested is not an opener. Go ahead and shit in your pants, throw up, or feint. . . but before you do, hit it, hit it, hit it.
NO. . . Is "Do you have a boyfriend?" a line you came up with your opener exercise? Does it strike interest? Does it pertain to the situation? Just because you have not yet properly executed the correct strategy does not mean you should default to a bad strategy. Work on presenting the correct strategy. Do not stray.

Odd... I can't seem to quote for whatever reason on the forum, perhaps the javascript isn't working, so I have to type the tags in manually. Yeah... who knows, I happen to be a short arse, so maybe it makes me more approachable to gay guys? Maybe I do look like a f^g? Meh I'll accept that. Maybe I draw energy towards others. Again this is plausible, I opened some sets quite nicely, some girls smiled, some didn't.

Either way it is an inconsequential as discussing the weather. On a side note I've totally fallen out with the idiots who run around the group taking the piss out my closet mates. I've also tried organize a drink with one of them, whether he will agrees I don't know. But let's keep this journal about me...

Agreed.

Again agreed... I guess I was thinking I just need to spit this out. The less I need to say perhaps the easier it might be. Either way, I'm skipping the process and trying to get right to the end. It it better to ask for a coffee sometime after a good opener than it is to just ask if they are single. End of the day I am not qualified to know. I will not stray.

Now petro-girl, happens to be working in the subway section of the station now! Do I got to get a subway sandwich to go speak to her? Hmmm. I already know the answer to that question...

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

No... no coffee. The idea is to rattle off 10 different ideas until she bites on one and goes "WOW! That sounds Awesome." This could be a walk in the park, a stroll at a museum. . . there is no way to know until you rattle them off to her. Haven't we gone through this before? The idea is to create excitement and make it practically her idea that you to go out on an adventure. This "let's go to drink coffee and get to know each other better" is better suited for job interviews. It's better suited for desperate 35 year old chicks who are practically DYING to get married. What the hell is a 'coffee'? Hell, I get coffee with my cousin on Sunday mornings. I get coffee with my smelly fishing friends on Saturday mornings. I drink coffee with strangers and homeless dudes on weekday mornings. Do your homework. Get a whole bunch of openers and date ideas ready to ROLL. I haven't been traveling intensively for well over 4 years and I can tell you well over 100 date ideas from 6 different countries in less than 20 minutes. Bars, restaurants, clubs, tourists traps, hikes, etc . . . Tip of your tongue... ready to present... all the time, every time. I am actually surprised by your lack of preparation. You've been here for years now... and the best you can come up with is, "Do you have a boyfriend" and "Let's go get coffee."? Come on man...

Went to the student union yesterday. Opened three sets pathetic. Got tomorrow off.


Openers...

1. OMG that super hot girl with the glasses and red hair... Hey yeah can you help me?
Oh sorry you thought I meant you.... I meant the girl behind.
[point with a dead pan face, wait till she turns around, then say]
Got you didn't I, can you help me find where the ____ are? Segway into an question, how her day's been.
2. Fast food joint, 'god damn I'm so sick of fast food... do you know how to cook?' Well I'm free this evening for a romantic meal. If you're interested I'll ask my girlfriend to save another seat at Bar Tacos Del Rios.
3. So I was wondering, I need a pair of trainers. Got any suggestions. What... That pair? No you gotta be kidding. OK that's it ...we're sooo over.
4. I need a shirt. I'm going to a charity Do.
5. What's a girl like you doing in a place like this.
6. Excuse I was wondering where... actually. I just wanted to tell you was was hot hot hot. Oh god I got my hand trapped in the toaster again. I gotta stop bringing it out with me in my pocket.
7. OMG OMG Wait a second, I just remembered something important. I left one of my knives in the fork tray.
8. Puppy dogs or cats?
9. Hey you keeping busy? You look mischieveous.
10. I really really need help with something. I'm lost but I found you.
11. Are you looking for me? No ? Would have been my lucky day.
12. We gotta stop bumping into each other like this (shop assistant in the shop)
13. Hey... I just met you... And this is crazy. But here's my number call me maybe.
14. I like what you've done with the stand (girl on mall stand)
15. Feet of the sofa ( girl sitting crossed legged on sofa in the mall)
16. I said I wouldn’t date bad girls anymore. Get out of
17. here.
18. What are you guys still doing here? That’s it, get out,
19. I’m going to have to call security.
20. I’m going to have to ask you to leave. (Smile)
21. Do you guys have ID?
22. You’re way too young for me.
23. It’s okay, you can kiss me.
24. I was just trying to have a guys night-out. You totally
25. ruined it. You had to be so cute.
26. You’re so totally adorable, like a puppy. Bad puppy,
27. you’re always trying to slobber on me.
28. OMG, it’s you! I can’t be seen talking to you again, I’ll
29. be right back.
30. You guys aren’t from (The city you’re in), there’s no
31. way. How long are you in town for?
32. If you can take me anywhere on vacation where would
33. it be?
34. No, its fine, you don’t have to buy me a drink.
35. You are taking this way too seriously.
36. You’re messing it all up. You’re back to square one
37. with me, missy.
38. That’s it. You lost me. I’m not talking to you for two
39. minutes.
40. Let’s play a game. Let’s see how long you can hold
41. your breath.
42. Where’s your off button?
43. Let’s see if you’ve got game. Try and pick me up.
44. You’re cool. You can help me pick up chicks.
45. That’s it. We’re broken up/divorced. I want half of my
46. shit. Thank God for pre-nups.
47. If that were true you wouldn’t love me.
48. You’re dead to me.
49. I still love you. Like a little sister. You’re adorable but
50. annoying.

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

Seeding a more exciting day 2

1.So it was nice talking with you. There's this little place, I don't know if you know it, they do wicked hot chocolate, the cafe boy even draws a smiley face with whipped cream on the surface. You gotta see it it is so funny. Let me grab your number.

2. Nice talking to you... hold out hand... ask name. Do you like sushi, I've always wanted to try out 'yo sushi' the way it comes out on the conveyor belt, I heard it is a real must see. Do before you die type thing. Let me grab your number and we can check it out together.

3. So are there's this new cocktail bar up near _____. My mate bangs on about because they do some of the best. You gotta try it out
they even give you a little umbrella if you want in the drink. Let me grab your number.

_________________
*Justice renders the WEAK his due*
My Journal
here-vp445642.html#445642

Great! Rattle them off. The reason to write 50 is because only a few will become actually useful. If you wrote 3, none would be useful. This has nothing to do with skill level or imagination. . . it's simply the way of life. Everything requires revision. Here are a few that I like:
Cliche's... Love it when it's delivered right. You gotta go with it and when she rolls her eyes, have another pick up cliche ready to go, then another, then another, then a laugh together. It works every time.
Nice.
Nice if you can sell it. I can. . . and I will. . . thanks for the idea.
Also nice if you can sell it. I do a whole variety of ^this same idea when it's right. "Wait. . . please wait while I call the authorities." - then I work backwards until it's obviously just a spoof. Show some ID, call. . . then, "We have a code 23 at the lower lobby. Please advise." .... then finally to the girl later on, "No, I definitely saw you trying to steal that VIP table. The last time it happened at this club, the perp was shot out on the parking lot with the table over his head. I'm just trying to help you here."

Several others are OK too.

In terms of day 2:

You are not trying to excite you. You are already excited. Excite her. She's the one you are trying to take out on a date. Secondly, I realize that you try to condense the pitch into one phrase but that's not the way it works. The whole thing unfolds in a conversation. . . and while the conversation is going on, if you do it right, you will hear 100% positive feedback. "Oh my God!". . . "That sounds awesome!". . . and that's when you just offer to take her with you. Simple. . . but takes some time.