I'm not from the US and I'm currently living in a small town out West. My roommates went out of town so I thought why not take advantage of the Friday night by myself and see how I do solo in the bars, for only the second time ever. I can't remember much from the first time I decided to go out solo (more than a year ago), other than I didn't interact with girls, mostly just people I bumped into that I happened to know. I'm not sure if it'd be easier in a big city with more options, maybe it might be a little easier for me.

When I got to the first bar at midnight (bars close at 2 am), I realized I was more nervous than I imagined I'd be. I was really calm all the way before and once I was in, I decided to get a drink to calm my nerves and just try to walk around to see if I happened to know anyone to start talking to and warm up. Didn't have any luck so I just made small talk with a random group of people around me. I did randomly get complimented by a girl who was looking for her drink and it just happened to be behind me, but she was leaving too quickly for me to take it further.

Most of the girls seemed to be having a "girls night out" sort of thing, but I did manage to open one of the hottest girls I saw all night - a random guy I started a bit of banter with asked me if I knew the girls dancing behind me, so I got their attention to ask if they did know me and got a few laughs around me. I then introduced myself straight away to the girl I liked and she seemed flattered. When I asked her to dance though (maybe too soon? ...right after the introduction), she politely refused and I just moved on. I did catch her glancing at me twice, but I figured there wasn't much in it and just kept dancing. By then I was feeling more relaxed and having a good time anyway.

I went to another bar and had a bit more luck on the dance floor as a girl just seemed to come up to me a few times and dance (even grind a bit). I opened her and we spoke for 5-6 minutes but she suddenly got a bit embarassed that she was older than me and pulled the plug, so I just kept dancing.

Overall, it was just two hours but I thought I did alright. I'm wondering if I should have gone a bit earlier to try my luck? I don't know really. I like to dance and I try not to get affected by rejections. I just had two beers all night, so I was sharp enough to notice that there were a handful of people who just stand and hang around the bar or the wall, looking on wistfully at the dance floor. I'm glad I decided not to be one of them!

I want to take a moment to credit this video by RSD's Julien for inspiring me to go with a mental "frame". It's a long video, but I think it gave me the right motivation and really simplified things.

I'd appreciate any tips and thoughts on this experience! I'm quite new to pick up but I feel good about it already!

Well done for going out solo.

Lots of area's that you could work on.

Asking girls to dance is usually the wrong way to go unless you do it properly from a place of value and lead it properly. But it's very hard to pinpoint exactly what you did wrong just over text on a computer screen.

She kept checking you out after that. I would guess that she was continuing to IOI you and a part of her was still considering you as an option. There are so many different moves you could pull off in a position like this that could get her more intrigued in you.

Keep going out alone and improving. In my opinion it's one of the best things you can do for your game. Once you get good your self confidence will skyrocket and the freedom it gives you is beautiful.

Thanks! A little more detail about the situation with the girl - after I had opened her she seemed to just pick up with the music and get back to dancing with the girl in front of her. They were dancing pretty close so it looked tricky to barge in. Also since she was dancing and wasn't facing me, I didn't know if I could keep the conversation going somehow. Now that I think about it, maybe I could have said something like "Come her and try this <fake dance move>". I don't know.