| Long story short, I ended a relationship about 4 months ago, it was a drastic failure. However I would not trade it for the world because I learned so much from it. The biggest two aspects that I underestimated was abundance and value. I was dating a girl who did not provide any value in my life, it was a horrible exchange. I added so much value into her life while I received none. Value is subjective, however many guys place value on girls without fair reason. Just because she looks great doesn't mean you need to put in the extra mile to make things happen. In my particular past situation the only thing that this girl could offer me was pussy and company, added on to the fact that she wasn't that attractive. I placed this girl so high on a pedestal, just because those two simple things I had easy access to. You do NOT need to be in a serious relationship to enjoy a woman's company or to get laid. You obviously want to be in a relationship that is fulfilling, an equal exchange of investment, time, etc. Each person within the relationship should benefit equally or better yet the girl is providing a bit more for you. Its all about the intangible aspects. When a girl leaves you when you know deep down she isn't good for you or making your life better in any shape or form, its a losing battle.
Its almost like being at a casino, I was basically down on all my cash, and I just wanted to leave the casino with my money back. Thats exactly how I felt when the relationship was over, I was an emotional mess. I was trying to make sense of it all. I just wanted something from her, I felt that I deserved something just because I put so much shit into it. Sometimes you need to walk away as a loser while your down so you can prevent yourself from losing any further.
4 months has passed, I feel like I am a different person, a better individual with women. I can understand women better and will continue to improve as I gain more experience and to be honest I am just starting. I had my first date with a new girl this past Friday after keeping to myself for 4 months. Now its really a blur, however I can say that it was the best thing that I could have done for myself. She is attractive, "girly girl" type, I definitely leveled up. Everything was going too easy, we met online and I initially didn't want to meet her up in person, because she was pinging me to hangout with her a little too much after I declined some offers from her, or maybe I just didn't want to get off my ass and do better. Text exchange was on point before the date, on the date I took her to this nice lounge for drinks, she even asked me what I like to drink, I told her tequila, she left the table went to the bar and bought us two shots lol. I felt like I knew her forever and I never been more comfortable on a first date setting. We spent about 5 hours together that night walking around going to different venues. A few times she mentioned that she never had a guy ask her types of things on a first date. I was going deep into discussion about relationships, sex, and life. Which turned into a lot of intense sexual innuendo from her part, she was so comfortable with me that she ended up massaging my hands at the table and was suggesting that she gives some great back massages lol. I was a little drunk when I got back home and tired so I went to bed. Woke up to a text message and missed call saying that she wants to talk on the phone and was sad that our date was short (which is wasn't), and that she was lonely in bed.
Will I see her again most likely, will I bang her, yes if I choose.
However I really don't care about any of that, the main takeaway is I highly doubt this date would have gone good if I didn't have that past failure. It was really weird because I thought it went too good. At the end of the day I am just happy with myself for knowing that I can do better. When you know you can do better and stop settling the world can literally open up for you. This has given me the motivation to not just stop at this one girl but to continue to improve myself and meet many other women.
The takeaway is to never let a women drain you of your value while you receive nothing in exchange. Anyone can get pussy and a date, but not many will have a rotation of women in their life who are actually worthwhile.
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CHAT