You have heard it said that when you go into a bar to pick up girls the hottest girl in the bar is always the bartender. Well I have established a first name basis with this bartender. Following expert advice, I don't hit on her like the other guys in the bar. You may want to note that the owner of the bar is my next door neighbor. I have sent her a friend request on face book but she has not replied saying she is barely on. Also consider I know she has a kid so that would take up much of her time. Last night I asked if she wanted to hang sometime. She said "no, I don't hang out." Either that is true, she was playing hard to get, she was following rules or a combination of any or all of the above. As I left, I slipped her my number with the tip wishing her a Merry Christmas. Did I blow anything?

And BTW a happy holidays to all of you.

Hey man, she made it plain and simple she's not interested... Facebook friend request ignored + "I don't hang out" and she's a single mom (these ladies seem to have their shit together more than single no-kid types)

Slipping her the phone number would have worked if she was attracted to you (plenty of IOIs) but reluctant to give you her number in front of the people at the bar. In that case, there would have been a slim chance that she would have called you... But number + tip sends out the message "provider" and in a sleazy kind of way... the provider vibe works when hinted, not spoken...

Hope this helps and happy holidays!

I really don't think she's interested either. Saying she "Doesn't hang out" means that she is not interested. She could easily get a babysitter or someone to just sit with her kid while you go on a date. She could be one of those people who just doesn't go out because they work as a bartender all the time.

But then again I really don't think she was interested.

Well there have been plenty of IOI's

You don't seem to have demonstrated value. You need to show how awesome you are with social proof. You also need a fully drawn out plan. Leaving plans in the open is normally bad for PUA.

I say next her, and open up ten other women. I also would suggest a new bar. Otherwise, try using her as a pivot, though at this point I say cut your losses.

Walk into the next bartender to demonstrate status, talk about mental states, and remember she is working and getting hit on by hundreds. Thus, you must try to neg her. Great job on opening and hanging in there tough.