Hala to all pua's, Im Sbu from South Africa. Turning 17 years old and did I day Im Xhosa. So im in High School, suppose to be the greatest time of my life or anyones actually but it aint to me.

Low self esteem is the issue I have to overcome before i turn 19, thats when i finish school and go to initiation school (cultural thing). I'm already studying hypnosis and im trying to go into a deep trance so that my subconscious can accept my suggestion.

So this post is about myself and mostly high school life, I'm only doing this bcoz i believe i can track my progress. An old saying goes, a man who moves mountains begins by carrying away small stones.

See u later guyz

Phew, hectic around here so sorry for not posting, so as u know tommorrow is school and i have to go because i don't have a choice even if every fibre in my being says NO. HATE MONDAYS. I hav been playing chess to get over my anxiety around people. I think i become anxious because i fear rejection and chess teaches me to lose in order to learn, kinda strange i know.

So my popularity is below average so to speak but hey thats gonna change, im planning on taking advantage of school activities such as interact and land service.will come tommorrow so any advice will be needed, see u later. So while im writing on my phone (Computer is just off bounds since granny died and the house is packed), im sitting outside feeling the chillz of the wind. So brief of myself. As i said im 16 nd turning 17, im a bit shy around strangers and people who I'm not too familiar with but one i get used to someone I get comfortable. In school im named the random guy, i have a few friends (but i don't sit with them), and i do have i usually just talk to. So i hide in toilets and this has to end.

So my first field report

Phew, hectic around here so sorry for not posting, so as u know tommorrow is school and i have to go because i don't have a choice even if every fibre in my being says NO. HATE MONDAYS. I hav been playing chess to get over my anxiety around people. I think i become anxious because i fear rejection and chess teaches me to lose in order to learn, kinda strange i know.

So my popularity is below average so to speak but hey thats gonna change, im planning on taking advantage of school activities such as interact and land service. So while im writing on my phone (Computer is just off bounds since granny died and the house is packed), im sitting outside feeling the chillz of the wind. So brief of myself. As i said im 16 nd turning 17, im a bit shy around strangers and people who I'm not too familiar with but one i get used to someone I get comfortable. In school im named the random guy, i have a few friends (but i don't sit with them), and i do have i usually just talk to. So i hide in toilets and this has to end.

So my first field report will come tommorrow any advice will be good.

First School Report

Monday 11/02/2013
Okay on Monday woke up, brushed my teeth and ate breakfast. Today I thought was going to be a GREAT day. Positive Affirmations are excellent on putting me on the right move so before I go to the taxi rank I had to wait on a long queue, which actually made me pissed off After about 15 minutes the bloody taxi appeared finally arrived but I seriously knew I was behind schedule ( I track time so that I can estimate when I will arrive at school). So arrived at the taxi rank and OMG, I swear God was playing a trick with me, the queue was so long that it made an S shape. 7:45am after a long time standing and waiting for the queue to end I finally made in a taxi and i knew I'm getting detention today for coming late. 8:45am I'm at school this is really a bad way to start my day, could this day get any worse.....

It is a slow day today and it's break and the toilets are my haven. Sh#t, guess what, the prefects are not allowing no one inside the school building during break, so what do I do, I go to the computer room and play Counter Strike with two dudes from my class and thiese guys are my partners when we do any oral.

-Ben : hey Sbu what the hell are you doing here dude

-Sbu : I heard that you guys are the raining champions of counter strike( They are) , so thought to I'll come to and kick your white butts( no racism)

- Anthony : Thats what the all say, sit down will play the terrorist mode, Ben and I will be the counter-terrorists and you and Dave will be the terrorists.

We had fun, I got my ass kicked, I think I died 19 times trying to the palce the frickin bomb. I don't really talk a lot in class, especially in physics Got out of school alone as usual and met up with my big bro. His really cool, he suggested to get some chicken in this fast food place and we arrive and it was packed. There where people still waiting for their order. I suggested we go somewhere else but he betted to me he will order.

Big Bro - Sbu i bet to you I'll get my order first then those people

Sbu - You crazy, I'll believe it when i see it

Big Bro -(he walks up to the teller or what ever you want to call that woman who take your order, and he look at her name badge) Hey Bridget it's really crowded over here neh

Bridget - Ya, it's pay day so you actually expect it.

Big Bro - I know even though it's full you'll get my order (something along those lines)

Bridget - hehehe, fine

He gets his order and we leave, Im Stunned

Wednesday13/02/2013

One days to go till Valentines Day, and I don't have a date but no biggy. So anyway today nothing special other than the prefect are seriously enforcing this, "No One in School Building During Break Policy". So I bumped to an old friend, so I talked to her and seriously when I say friend I mean friend. She is chubby but today when some girl said she was fat in a joking way, she said she is not fat but naturally curved , awesome this girl has swag. The second break I just spent my entire time in a Land Service duty.
Nothing much I can report on that I talked to some crazy dude, white people (no racism) in my school are a bit wild though, they just cracked me up. I think the dudes name is Alex. Other than that its nothing much, wait there is this one girl in Grade 8 who I'm a bit confused by. We in the taxi cramped, she put her arm over the seat. Now I'm sitting there drowsy when i feel a soft object softly rubbing on my shoulder, guess what, it's her BREASTS ,

WTF, she slightly leaning towards me in a subtle way, I am kinda paralyzed IN SHOCK, why isn't she moving her body or at least her breast away, like come on. When she did finally get out our eyes met. This is no love at first sight so hold your horses. I'm in Grade ten and she is in 8 so she is a freshmen as you Americans call it.

GOALS

- Kiss a girl by end of February (My first Kiss)

-Grow my popularity steadily

-Gain more confidence

-Be able to sustain and keep conversation interested

I'll really try hard to write my Valentine Special Field Report,lol, I hope i can make the most of it though

THE VALENTINES DAY FIELD REPORT

So I'm writing this repprt on my phone. Okay, so far I'm still bumped, it's the end of the day and I feel I could have done better, seriously tho. School is a great place to be if you have friends or what I usually call the "Pack". If you ever seen a pack of wolves hunting,, they are lead by the alpha-male through the Snowy storm and in closibg down the prey. My point is, I need friends of who I can trust and work to climb the social ladder. Don't get me wrong, I don't want THE most popular dude, just popular enough to get around and be known.

I thought this day will be different but no, in the morning when we were lining up, I didn't even speak to one person. I don't know whats holding me back and I need to find this blob of sh#t and get rid of it. Did you know confidence is just a small lobe in the brain, a SMALL LOBE, I'm talking about something that takes up 50% of your brain mass. Before I go to sleep U have to go into a really deep trance in which my subconscious will accept my suggestions. They say that the subconscious cannot tell the difference between a lie and the truth.

Okay, back to the Day of Love, so while I was reminiscing in the scotching hot sun with a breeze of wind careesing my face I happened to notice someone was infront of me. It was the girl I do maths with and asked for my book since you know, a dedicated student I am, I do my homework. So I thought maybe this time she has to beg me for it just to create some rapport. Take not, this was talkin in in isiXhosa

HB 5 - Sbu give me your maths book, I want to copy down some answers

Sbu - Why will i want to do that?

HB 5 - I forgot about about please

Sbu - But you always forget, i should not give you my book because I'll be babying ( Xhosa thing) you

HB 5 - Please i wont do it again

By this point I give it to her knowibg she owes me. At maths class im talking to my classmate while standing besides her desk when she arrive and gently pushes me away. I tell her is this how she treats her friend who lent her a book. ( I said the word friend for a reason). She apologises. Then after school in lines, she say hi and i don't. She stops and says hi again starring straight at me. So Im obliged to greet her.

I wont be posting until Monday coz tommorrow im not goin to school, going home and on Saturday its the funeral and Sunday im coming back home to where i trully live. So see ye

Hey man! Just wanna say you've got a good job going. I'd try to push things with the 'breasts' girl if I were you. Keep us posted. And good luck from a fellow high-schooler!