First off, a shout out to Zastro. His blog inspired me to do this. I needed something to hold me accountable. When I decide to start a workout routine, I waffled quite a bit. It wasn’t until I found a forum to post my progress that things began to take off. My competitive (can compulsive) nature compel me to stick with it. Knowing that I put myself out there, and others can call me out when I flake, pushes me. I decided to apply that same mentality to my game.
I recently divorced after a 13-year marriage. I was jettisoned into this single life without a clue. I haven’t had to game a chick since 1996. I do have some things going for me: I own my own home, have a good-paying job, am in decent shape (and improving daily), am good-looking, and well-educated (not to sound egotistical, just being honest). I know all those factors aren’t the end all to game (hell, if you buy what the gurus are selling, you can be fat, bald, ugly, and penniless), but those factors can’t hurt. My confidence has sky-rocketed, mainly do to the improvement of my physique and the knowledge I have gained.
When we split in July 2011, I was a reject. I fumbled around like a middle-schooler at his first dance. I met some chicks, mostly by dumb luck, and they were in the 7-8 category, but I was too unconfident and quickly effed it up. In December, I decided to shut it down and learn. I read, read, read books and forums. I worked on my inner and outer game. In March of 2012 I was ready for the relaunch. I was doing pretty good. I scored numbers, but it was still more opportunistic than it was creating opportunities. But, friends even commented on how chicks would just come up to me! That felt good. Then, BAM! My back exploded. This was a double-edged sword. I could practice in the field, but I was able to read more and learn. After my surgery in June, and being cleared for activity in July, it was back on! Now, I had gained some weight while feeling sorry myself and being immobile for about 4-months, so my first goal was to start working out again. I finally hit a stride, and I’m looking a lot better.
I don’t really subscribe to any one system. I’m smart enough to recognize that all these pundits are basically saying the same thing. It all really comes down to 95% Big D1ck Mentality. For my confidence to succeed, I like to believe that every one is interested and everything is an IOI. If you can walk the walk and talk the talk and actually walk up to a girl and talk, you’ve won the battle. Of course, this doesn’t mean I always win that battle. Moreso, mid-game is still a sticking point. I’m smart and funny enough to run situational routines, but I flounder with kino escalation. My excuse? Maybe being married for over a decade has made me a little hesitant when touching girls who don’t know me from Adam. Also, I have had to battle being touched. I naturally don’t like being touched by strangers. I had a friend set me up on a date with one of her girlfriends early on in my career and when she met me for the first time we hugged (ok with that), but when she let go of the hug, she rubbed her hand along my chest. Now, instead of thinking DING! DING! DING! IOI!, I thought, “who does this chick think she is thinking she can just touch me like that?!?” Pathetic. I effed it up. I’ve grown. I’ve learned that making mistakes is important to improving. I’ve lessened my viewpoint of taking setbacks as setbacks and instead turning them into analysis of how I messed up.
What I need to work on? Everything. I don’t ever want to stop learning. Like I say with my job, the day I think I am the best at what I do is the day I need to do something else. Always improve. I have zero unmarried friends, and nearly all of them are locked down with kids. I have joint custody of my kid, so I have him 3 days a week and 2 weekends a month. All this means is that my time is not always my own and that I have to solo a lot. I need to work on soloing at night. I come up with excuses for night game when I should realize that daygame is essentially soloing.
That’s me in a nutshell. Well, a giant coconut shell since this is so long. Be vicious. That’s how I learn. Critique. That’s how I see beyond my purview.
Thanks for reading.

11/3

An HB8 who worked at a sushi bar I used to go to recently sent me a text to invite me to her birthday party. Looking back, she was interested and I effed it up because I was AFC at the time. We texted back and forth and I was pretty solid with my text game. I met her and her friends out at a club at 9PM. It had been months since we talked. I was interested in gaming her, but it wasn't my sole goal. One of her friends took an interest in me after the introductions. She was a bit old for my tastes, but is cute and had a killer rack. I chatted her up, then excused myself to go to the restroom. When I came back, I caught her in a conversation with another girl about how her bra was bothering her and she wished she could take it off. I offered my services, and she laughed. Then she was all over me, and started showing me texts from this AFC who was declaring love for her after two dates. This went back and forth for a while. Then she asked if I was gay? I didn't let it phase me. I just offered to prove to her I wasn't if she'd like. She laughed and then said I was too cute and well-dressed to be straight. I reiterated my original offer. Then her phone blew up again from that guy. She handed me her phone and asked what would I text. I took the phone, and pretended to text the dude. She asked what I texted. I said nothing, and she looked at me curiously. Instead, I had put my number in the phone with a cheeky name for me. She was giggling and texted me a cheeky name back for herself so I'd have her number. Having won that round, I decided to excuse myself for a bit and look around. I spotted this other chick ordering a drink at the outside bar. I started a conversation with her. As it turns out, she was in our party. She just showed up late and was grabbing a drink before heading in where it was more crowded and difficult to get service. I walked her in and we chatted for a bit. It was getting ridiculously loud, and I was making the mistake of getting ridiculously drunk, as the birthday shots seemed to be coming quicker and quicker. The HB who invited me took me outside to met some other people. During this time I was being sociable and running my schtick, but kinda stuck with this group. The girl I was trying to game before being pulled away came up, and we talked some more. I was getting definite IOIs from her. Then this time she was called away. I had to be home sooner than later because I had my kid in the AM, so I needed to not be hungover and tired. I stalled for a bit, to see if she'd return, but I had to bolt. I didn't get her number.

Still wanting it, I texted the HB the next day:

Me: Hey ninja (that's my pet name for her) you know that girl who showed up later that I was talking to?

No response. Been two days. She's normally a quick texter.

Not sure how to interpret this. I can't think jealousy, as she was all over this other dude who was there. I haven't been able to think of a way to re-text her again without looking needy. I though about negging her with the jealousy, but that could backfire, too. I was planning on texting the original chick I scored the number from, but decided to try to get this girl's number first. Now, it looks like I may not get that one, and I iced myself out of texting the girl I did get because they are all friends and it might look like I'm obviously gaming them. Any ideas? Should I just say eff it and roll the dice and text the other chick? I should, right? What do I have to lose. I already have two other girls I'm texting. Or, is there a way to recover with the HB and still get that number from her? Ahh...it's fun.

Lesson: Watch my drinking. And think digits first.

11/6

Was on the way to work, and stopped at the Walgreen's to grab some drinks. When I walked in, I scanned the place, as I learned to do. Made sure my body language projected confidence. I passed by a chick who was standing in line. I made eye-contact, held, and smiled. She smiled back then looked away. I hustled to the drinks to try to get back to be in line behind her. I was able to. Then line was moving slow, and she seemed in a hurry. Someone was trying to buy something but didn't have a discount card. The cashier asked if she wanted to apply. The person in line was being indecisive, and before I could open the girl in line, she offered to put in her number for the lady. She did, then game back in line. Here we go:

Me: That was nice of you.

Her: Smile.

Me: Could you wait for me to buy my stuff so you could put your number in for me?

Her: (laughing) Do you need really need it? I need to be at so and so in like 5-minutes so I needed that other lady to hurry up.

Me: No but...

Then it was her turn.

She was buying her stuff, then turned to me:

Her: You want me to wait and enter my number?

Me: I don't need you to enter your number for me.

Her: You sure?

Me: Yeah, not on the keypad, but you could enter it on my phone.

This felt ballsy to me. But it worked! Haha! I literally laughed all the way to work at myself. This may have been the most aggressive I've ever been in public. But, I declared to myself I wouldn't hesitate. Love 3-second rule.

She put it in my phone and still waited. We walked out together. I ran the whole you're-not-one-of-those-girls-who lines and she insisted no, but she never gave out her number like that before. I said that's cool and she wouldn't regret it. I texted her shortly after to just establish who I was and make sure it was for reals. She texted back right away. All good.

Lesson: Gotta go with gut and ignore AA. 3-second rule works. Take chances. Had she said no or ignored me, what do I care what the haus-frau behind the Walgreen's counter thinks. I can be ballsy. It was a minor victory for long-term PUs, but this made my night. Not scoring the number, but having the nerve.

11/7

I'm going to a show at a local club. Small venue, and a small national act. Should be some commonalities to draw on. I was going to take a GF of mine, but decided to use it as an opportunity. Don't take sand to the beach, after all. Unsure of the crowd. I'm assuming it'll be an indie crowd since it's indie music, but the original venue was supposed to be at a snootier part of town and now it has been moved to a venue near the university. Either way, I'll work on holding eye contact and adhering to the 3-second rule. I always like to shoot for three numbers, so that's what I'm gonna aim for. We'll see how it goes.

I went to the show. It was a great show, but a total sausage-fest. They were dudes or dudes with girlfriends. I pretty much resolved that this was a dead-end and with not having to work the next day and having been driven there, I decided to tie one on. Later in the night, as the show was winding down, my buddy withdrew to the outdoor patio to have a smoke. After a bit, I joined him (as company, not to, smoke). This is where I screwed up. This girl approached our table. Which is indicator#1. She came over and asked how we were doing, but her body was faced towards me. Indicator #2. We chatted a bit. And the topic of veganism came up. I am a vegan, and she was interested and qualified herself on a few occasions. Indicator #3. I talk about how I feel physical fitness is an obligation for a vegan so that they represent the cause and she talks about how broad my shoulders are and how good they look. Indicator #4. Then, I come up with a term that I prefer to vegan (cause I hate dealing with that word) and she giggles and says that's a perfect term. Indicator #5. Now, all this happens within 3-minutes or so.

So I am about to go in for the close, and then this dude ambles in from behind her and closes in. She turns to smile and he comes closer, as if he knows her. I text my buddy under the table "is this dude with he?" And he agrees that the dude is. I back off at this point. Then she decides to turn around to him and verbally rebuke him. This seemed to turn the interaction and she excused herself.

I went to the bar for a drink and when I came out I saw her across the room. I was gonna go over and re-appraoch, but I figured this would look too AFC...chasing her and all.

Anyways, I learned: just go for it and don't trust dudes in yellow shirts.

I decided to try phishing for that number from the HB's friend.

Me: Ok, If you wanna keep me all to yourself...all good

She got back in a while.

Ninja: lol, she's taken.

Me after a few hours: I never mentioned a name lol

Ninja: lol I just knew


Ok. So there were two chicks that I was chatting up. I don't know if she knows which one I am referring to. I was gonna say something along the lines of:

Me: Pshychic ninja! If S----a is taken, then I guess I'm stuck with you :p

Again, this one is just a friend. Anyway, not sure if I should push for the # one more time. I'm guessing that that would look like chasing.

Any ideas?

11/12

Didn't have to work due to the holiday, so decided to go out to the local sports bar to watch MNF. I wasn't really looking to sarge, but figured it was a good chance to practice talking to people, male or female, and if the opportunity arose, well y'know. Last time I was at this place, which was back in August, I number closed a batsh1t crazy chick (can I curse on here). We texted a few times, but I hit the ejector seat on that one.

Anyway, it was nothing but dudes (MNF and all) so I focused on making friends and being social. This worked well, as I struck up conversations with everyone around me. This isn't difficult for me, I can carry on a conversation and generally people like my company because I'm funny. It's not the nerve to talk to people that gets in the way, it's generally just the want to do so. Normally, I am content just chilling. A lot of times I just want to veg and won't initiate conversation. It just seems like so much work, but I force myself to initiate now and I am starting to enjoy it.

There is one sticking point at this place. There's a chick who works behind the bar who always seems to chat with me. She is gregarious and chatty with a lot of people, but there have been occasions where she has been off-shift and sat outside (I have a friend who smokes, so we are out on the patio a lot) with other friends and one night she sat next to me and commented that "you need to come in here more often." This night she winked and smiled at me and made it a point to shake my hand and wish me good night, calling me by name. Now, I recognize that she's a hired gun, and I normally don't have allusions about them, but this one has piqued my interest. I'm not sure if going there more often to feel it out gives me a better chance or makes me look creepy or turns me into just another customer. I'll go back in a few weeks and run some game.

Got a date with a chick I've seen a few times this Saturday. She asked me. I've escalated the sexual talk in our texts. We'll see how this goes.

Sent out three emails online. I experimented with a new technique, so I'm not sure how it worked. It was a little bit outside my normal frame, so it may have come off a bit staid. If I get no hits, I'll go back to my normal routine.