So last night we headed to a bar for a buddys birthday, just the boys. We had a table and i had slyly taken the center of the table with my back to the wall to seem like the Alpha Male. Waitress comes to take our order , shes an HB9, real cutie, named Jacqueline. I order a drink and give her that im interested smile and maintain eye contact while i talk to her. I made a bet with the Birthday boy for pride, whoever got her number first would be the winner.
She's hanging in the corner with another waitress, i turn to see she is lookng at us and laughing with her friend, then she proceeds to come over to me...
Hb9: Everything ok over here?
Me: yea thanks
Hb9: oh i thought i saw you looking at me as if you needed something
Me: no i saw you looking at me and then you came here and i thought you were just creeping on me or something

Hb9: (laughs and walks away)
20 minutes later- My friend approaches her some where else in the bar with me by his side
Friend: I have this theory that all the waitresses hear are Pace university students ( the dorms are across the street)
Hb9: no i actually not, im 24
Me: Oh so what do you do besides waitressing
Hb9: I work at blahblahblah, (she then leaves to attend to other customers)
we then go outside to have a cigarette and come back in. I sit on the end of the table and try to get Jacquelines attention so i can talk to her by myself and try to number close. she approaches
Me: so, what are you up to for Halloween?
Hb9: I dont really know, i dont have plans
Me: What are you going to be
Hb9: Havent thought about it, i dont know what im doing yet
Me: A friend of mine is throwing a party Saturday night why dont you come by
Hb9: Where is it
Me: in Meatpacking at blahblahblah
Hb9: cool why dont you write down the address before you leave
Me: whats your number ill text you the info (All my friends are listening to this and start to look over creepily)
As i say this she gets distracted and walks away
The bar closes shortly after and she is no where to be found.
We both lost the bet
What kind of criticism can you give me? Would appreciate a break down of some of the things i did or didnt do right.