Hey guys, just got back from a trip to the city and a little bartime fun, and with a successful number close I figured I'd write about my night. Hopefully my experience can help some of you next time you go out.
Feel free to skip the next to paragraphs, they are backstory and a little bit of comic relief as I talk about the buildup to the set.
Tonight was my buddy's bday, and I was able to drive into Pittsburgh's South Side. It's an epic place, where every block has at least 3 bars on it. Unfortunately, the bar we went to is a notorious sausage fest! hahaha, the guys who run that bar are a bunch of 30 year old single dudes who own the bar to pick up chicks, with the result being that women rarely go there unless with a boyfriend. Fortunately for me, my bud's gf has female friends, yay networking.
Now when her friends showed up, 2 cuties were in the group. I had a self-imposed curfew to avoid drinking too much since I drove out, so at first I thought that gaming could only get me into trouble. It would just be a reason to stick around and drink. However, as is family tradition, I said fuck it and decided to disregard the consequences.
HBrunette, one of the girls in our group, got my attention because she was dressed with class. She had a sweater on, skirt, leggings, and a scarf. You could tell she was hot, but she wasn't just hangin her tits on your face like some other girls do. What made this great was that I got a chance to use one of those opening routines we can usually just joke about. This bar always has one or two old dudes just getting hammered that creep on every girl around. So when I realized a girl who was in our slowly-forming party group was being creeped on, I just walked up to her, put my arm around her and said "wow, hun, way to not buy a drink for me too just because I had to use the rest room first! oh hey man, I'm ****" and amog the old man. Fun times, and it instantly gave us conversation topic #1. So my game is all about kino, especially minor physical touching early on. I joked around, asked her about what brought her to Pittsburgh for school, and throw in high fives, handshakes, and my personal fave, the pinky swear.
Guys, seriously, the pinky swear is underrated in the kino escalation systems everybody uses. It's just fucking adorable, women love it. And it gives you an option, because you can pinky swear on something, leave the set for a while, come back, and you now have a reason to immediately pick up the conversation again. In this case, my buddy's cousin actually picked me up and held me halfway over the bar, like ready to throw me. This girl was fuckin terrified, and then when I was put down said she would slap the guy if he actually threw me. Awww, she's lookin out for me, isn't that sweet?
I'd like to reference Chief's Outer Game Guide right now as the only resource I use to remind myself how to be good at this shit. I stepped away to the restrom, and had her promise to make sure nobody took my beer. This apparently turned into her saving my spot at the bar so I could cut in front of a dude trying to get a drink. It's minor, but it shows compliance. And once a girl agrees to a minor request, she is more likely to accept more, hooray.
So light kino is there, but now a twist. She has invited her uncle out to the bar. Yes, this new old guy talkin to her is her uncle, the fuck?! Apparently he was in town on business for the weekend and she hadn't seen him in months. Also apparently, this means its totally cool to invite him to the bar. Now a family member is hte ultimate cockblock, just like a sibling or close friend, I assume the uncle is making sure she does not get harassed. My new goal was to make this man my best friend, and it turns out I only did one thing wrong while doing that. I talk to HBrunette some and when she and all the other girls went on the herd's bathroom break, I just spoke to her uncle. This dude was fucking cool, just trying to have a few beers, relax, and see how his niece was doing in a new city. His only problem with me was I kept calling him "sir" (habit from martial arts). I promised not to make him sound so old by saying htat again, and henceforth he was on my side!
So up to this point, my game is being fairly basic. The kino is simple shit you'd do with a buddy, it's first tier stuff. The conversation is simple, using the old interview questions to find ways to learn about her and expand on that. Then i mention that I was going to leave. I drove into town and had a self-imposed curfew to prevent myself from staying out too long drinking. Didn't want to put myself in a bad situation. And this is when I think I am doing something right, because HBrunette grabs my arm and says I have to go out to at least one more bar with her. Not with the group, not with my buddy, WITH HER! the conversation is now no longer about the group out for the birthday, it is now about her and me. Cool.
As we walk down, I worry a bit. I tend to overcommit to sets, emotionally. I assume I am doing much better than I really am, and I think this is a problem many of us have. Because I think i am doing much better than I am, I ask for numbers without much attraction. Because I ask for numbers without much attraction, I get massive flakerates. So I worry a bit and decide not to hang with her too much as we leave the bar and go to the club. Yes, we were at a dive bar before, and moving to a dance club/bar. I bounced back and forth, between small talk with HBrunette and talking to other people in the group.
Another aside, I am an introvert. There is a common misconception that being introverted means you are antisocial, but that is not true by any means. Introverts simply dont communicate as well with large groups. We are, however, excellent at communicating one-on-one or in small groups. So I have adapted my game to this, and when out in large groups I prefer to find ways to talk to 1-2 people at a time and jump around rather than trying to entertain 10 people at once. walking down a sidewalk is an excellent opportunity to do this, since sidewalks simply aren't wide enough to accomodate a large group. You chat with your friends in one row, jump ahead and chat another row, fall back and chat the third row, etc. Now you introverts are involved with teh whole group without having to try to keep so many people's attentions
The club is busier, cheaper, oddly enough, to drink, and with much better music. At the same time, with the girl's uncle there, I am hesitating to go beyond that basic kino. By now, we are touching eachother's arms/shoulders as we talk, but still that's more discrete than dancing or anything like that. Instead, I just go up to the bar, order a drink, and prepare to walk back. Before I get a chance to pay, HBrunette's uncle adds my drink to his tab, and refuses to take my money. Can you say awesome? Now, in order to maintain the peace, I help him carry all the drinks he bought over to our group. In fact, he specifically said I could take the beer I grabbed to his niece. Wingmaning? Dunno, but I would rather assume and go bold than be afraid. So with rap mixes playing, I grab HBrunette's hand and start dancing a bit, like swing dancing stuff where we aren't right up against eachother. I know that if her uncle sees real dirty shit goin down he will just ruin my life and any future chances. Fortunately I don't need to, because HBrunette's girlfriend steps in between us and starts grinding on her.
As a man, i am required to gawk at women grinding on eachother. It's required, it's law, if you disagree you suck. Her uncle was more uncomfortable then than at ANY POINT earlier. Now as this is going down, I notice the time, and realize I have to get the girl's number. Seeing as how HBrunette had been hit on before by a creep, i decide to go a slightly different route. I give her my number. I realize many PUAs are against this, but if you don't like flakes, give your number out. Because then girls will contact you if they want, as opposed to just taking your number down. And that's a bigger IOI than any body language.
I got her number, she texted me as I finish this field report, and amidst my drunken memories I learned a few things:
1) feel free to save a girl from the creepy old dude, they will gladly play along and then you are in.
2) light kino is awesome, and the benfit to it being low-tier is you can do it all fucking night, making higherup kino easier
3) when faced with a cockblock, your best option may be to make that person your best friend, because they may buy you a rum and coke at the end of the night just since they like you and you stopped calling them "sir"
CHAT