A little background to begin with : One month ago i ended a series of 2 relationships one after another, each one being a year and bit. As sad and painful as it was, i found myself always being attracted to the world of Pick up but only devoting about 1 year of my adolescent life to it. 1 great year yeah? but i guess it didnt fit so much back then. so after returning to bachelorhood, i found myself surrounded by very subtle people who at the age of 22/23 felt like it was time to settle down and stay at home with their girlfriends on a friday night. Anyone who seems to run into this problem, i insist that you keep looking for people in your outer social circle cause every now and then you encounter a person who's looking to have a good time.
So, friday night, getting ready to the party and building up state.
Now this i feel is very conducive to your success cause no one can reflect confidence and fun when he aint feeling like that. correct me if im wrong.
What works for me are the usual things :
- Drinking a bit
- Good music (what ever appeals to your taste)
- Faces to the mirror, dancing a bit in your room if you feel like it
But one other thing i found very helpful was something i believe David Deangelo recommended :
Write down 3 experiences that made you feel a specific positive feeling : energetic, fun, happy, excited, confident etc. each experience relates to a different feeling and by writing them down you can memorize them and think about them any time you need just to boost up your energies. Really helped me.
We drove to the party, talked a bit, laughed and got in. Its always good to have fun and open people around you.
Now I, in my nature aint a very shy person, but due to the circumstances i felt a bit rusty so it took some time to open up. another thing that really aided me at start was something i saw posted here i think :
Just tell yourself that
"you're great at picking up girls and that you got nothing to fear". sounds silly but it did the trick for me.
1st approach : Cute blonde girl by the bar (I was always intimidated by blondes for no good reason. these things change
) -
I laughed at her that she isnt able to get drinks and very quickly negged her about her shoes not matching her clothes. Worked great and very soon she started defending herself in a half laughing half insulted way. I used this and told her she doesnt have a sense of humour again recieving nice results - all of this happened really fast, and i advise, well mostly myself but also you people that the quicker things happen the better their effect. She was a bit frustrated and told me that i'm too confident, but i believe she liked that.
Here's a moment that i'm pretty sure i could've done better : After a bit of kino and talking i felt like a planted the seed and that i'd probably hook up with her later so i told her im returning back to my friends and that i'll see her later. Should i have done things differently? it was the beggining of the party and it didnt feel right taking her number at the time. what do you think?
2nd approach : Girl on the dancefloor -
It took me a bit of time to approach again but between approach and non approach I try and choose the first option.
So i saw her and just took her hands and started talking and dancing. It always amazes me how much kino is important so seize every opportunity you get to touch. She was pretty wierd though, told me countless times that she cant hear a thing but asked me stupid questions (negged her about that) kept eye contact with her friend, had her phone in her hand the whole time (which i tried to grab to free both her hands for the dance. she protected it like a first born son.)
She enjoyed it i could tell, though she was wary of every little thing.
Long story short, i got tired of her and asked for her number. she told me that i could give her my number to which I refused and returned to my friends.
What would you do in my situation? give her the number? dunno.
3rd approach : Blonde girl sitting alone -
She was looking a bit lonely and a bunch of people danced stupidly by her so I took the chance and joked with her that she isnt impressed by their dancing skills.
Canned material is great for me when i'm trying to build rapport, but to begin a conversation i always try and take advantage of whats going on at the very moment. I guess that the more you do it, the better you could at spotting things that you can use in order to initiate a talk.
She told me that she cant hear me (you can always use this and make a haughty face and remark. most of the time it works but like all things it can backfire), so i bent over and started talking to her head level. A few sentences and here came my canned goods by
Jay Wa who posted some great routines.
I used this one and it worked really good :
"Answer two questions really fast, starting now"
"What is the colour of a fridge?"
probably 99 percent saw white
"What does a cow drink"
"Milk!" no dummy a cow drinks water, hehehehe.
She laughed immediately and it hooked her. She invited me to sit down :
Blatant IOI
we chatted a bit and of course kino , touching her hair, shoving her playfully and so on. I had no time to waste so i took her to the dance floor by the hand and we started dancing close. I dance ok, but im gonna take salsa lessons and I strongly think that dancing skills reallllllly help at
A) Boosting confidence
B) Demonstrating Value
C) Kino of course.
So we danced, i saw a bit signs of ASD as we both looked at each other, as there was ton of passion from both sides but she kept averting eyes when we had eye contact for more than a few seconds. I saw this and understood that kissing her wont be a good move.
Always read these signs as they are crucial in planning your steps
We danced a few more minutes, rubbing our thighs and i took her out of the dance floor to talk a bit and isolate.
Talked a bit, i laughed at her for reasons i forgot, she shoved me playfully by my chest, to which i gave her a Cocky look and told her that it feels good when she touches my breasts. she laughed and felt them a few more times (Being in a gym has its benefits...TMI?).
Told her i was going to my friends (I always tell myself that i should be the one ending the date/conversation/dance/kiss or whatever...feels better then having her do it, and it gives a good impression also and # Closed her. seems like a fun girl.
4th approach : The blonde girl from the beggining of the night -
I felt good, and i wanted to see if i could pull it off.
While "Casually" strolling around i spotted her with a friend while some dude was talking to her. the minute i came she gave me a hug and said that : I've come to rescue her. yeah thats why i came
I saw that the guy wont let go of her but i didnt feel a need to AMOG him as she kinda did that for me.
Tell me straight to my face/User - Was this a stupid mistake? should i have took her from him to myself? didnt wanna look like 2 boys were fighting over a girl so i told her "You're staying here right? (She says yes), so i'll come back soon", gave her a wink and returned 15 minutes later to eventually # close her.
5th approach : Cute girl sitting alone -
I just walked by, saw her smiling for a mili second, and immediately came to talk to her. She looked a bit down, so i told her that i'll just keep coming back and forth until she cant stop laughing.
Now here is a moment which i would like to get feedback upon cause i'm very unsure that I acted the way i'm supposed.
I wanted to return to my friends a bit and dance, so i told her without any rapport built, that she looks cute but i have to return to my friends, so she should give me her number and we'll talk some other time.
She was surprised and offered her Facebook account instead so i took her name and continued. Felt rather stupid, but i really did wanna dance a bit with my friends.
By the end i was with my friends and we went back home.
No k-close but 2 numbers and a facebook account. I always feel like there was more i could achieved but its nice for a start.
Summary :
1) State is one of the most important things in having good game. every person who yearns to develop good game has to work on this and things become way more natural. I noticed this on my 5th approach that i didnt have to do alot, cause i just felt good.
2) taken from "The Game" : Always look and feel at your best, whether it means you pluck out hairs from your eyebrows, shave your crotch, dress good or smell like a million bucks. Anything that makes you feel a bit less attractive, go and change it cause you can.
3) Kino is always important...once again i state the obvious but it helps me also
4) Dont hesitate to approach, cause from every crappy approach you learn and from every good approach you also learn + bonuses
5) Dont take rejection too hard and always rise above(easier said than done, but is of utmost importance)
6) if it helps, carry a piece of paper with routines you wanna try out. helped me.
7) Always present yourself as someone interesting. even if you're working at a mundane office job, dont let it look like you feel its boring, cause she'll sense that. If you have some accessories i find it quite funny inventing a background story more interesting than "i put it on so you'd ask me about it".
Hmm...pretty long. i wonder how i'd feel if the computer will reset itself before i'll submit.
Comments, criticism both good and bad, and advice will be dearly appreciated.
Have a great day everyone...
CHAT