The importance of presence
I was with a friend/student today, who out of nowhere decided that he wanted to suddenly start socializing with women.
My initial reaction was... are you serious? thinking in the back of my head that he will get more or less obliterated in his current state, as hes a fairly shy, very un emotional, bland, empty individual.
After allot of convincing on his part, i decided alright, ill support you, but keep in mind its 6:30 pm and we really should be at some venue doing this. He told me that he was fine and he wanted to walk around see what he can do!
I'm like... "hmmmmm, okay Its your life! "
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I would've been more encouraging but I could simply see the dynamics, its not looking at the situation in a positive or not so positive light as its just facing reality and seeing what he can accomplish...
After walking around for a while, i kept nudging him to talk to women, as he constantly missed some really easy opportunities, groups of 2-4... It started getting really funny... so I'm like "whats wrong man? do you want me to start the conversation? You can push the button at any time and ill run it... I mean come on, your just standing there..." but he insisted that he was ready... Finally after 30 min if not slightly more, of me nudging him to talk and saying "omg.... dude... you just missed..." he finally decided to open his mouth!
He sneaked up behind a girl and asked her for directions, and the second she saw him she felt so scared and creeped out! as the compadre on the side, i immediately walked in with a super high energy and a sassy cheeky look and voice tone, restoring her vibe, making sure everything goes well so she dosn't call him a freak!
Anyway the situation was resolved, so i immediately commented, that he walked up to her and he had no presence, you can't just go up to women and be a whimp, you have to hold your body back, speak fairly loudly and confidently, and always be sexually aware as a man, and let her feel that! Be slightly cheeky, and even nudge her! Women are always there to respond to a good interaction.
After another 10 min, and he missed allot of beautiful women, by that time i wanted to commit suicide! he decided to get some food and take a small brake... so we sat down and we talked and again he was very insistent that he knew everything I was saying, but i somewhat felt like he didn't really hear any of it...
So right out of Maccas, we see a girl taking a picture, i practically throw him in there hahaha... so hes like
Him:"Ugh... uh.. excuse me, do you know how to get to central?"
Again the chick lookt bewildered! almost like she was going to cry and cut her wrists at the same time.
Again i ran in there, but very evidently in between both of them and defused the situation.
Yet another 20 min passed and we finally saw this cute girl with a book, and he wanted me to open! Just to see what it would be like!
I quickly lookt at the girl and I'm like... shes nothing special, but sure whatever!
i walked up
Impact: "hey!"
Then i noticed she gave me a certain look because i was with my friend, she slightly lookt over at him then me, and I knew i had to catch her out on it immediately
Impact: "what? ..."
Amy: "oh nothing
haha, im just waiting for your question"
We talked for a while, vibed, there was some instant chemistry, and I could have easily taken it to any other level.... but we kept it short and had some fun... She had a book and really funny glasses! so i commented and she started getting really vibrant and energetic, then i lookt over to my friend to tell him that this is the reaction she has to give you (with my eyes), but he was somewhat in the corner, like a shadow more or less paralyzed, pretending hes a stranger or a security police dude undercover lol.
Anyway we parted ways, and hes like "okay.. very informative" it sounded as if he wanted a benchmark to go up from, so there was better to come from him I'm sure.
We were walking past Art House in the city, and there was this absolutley stunning girl, with beautiful inclosed white shoes... and legs to die for! She was paying some toll for her parking and i shuvved him in there.
Again he kinda did the slug method, of slithering on the side of her, with horrible body language,and a voice of a chipmunk asking for directions.
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I again ran up and stood far behind my friend but she was in perfect viewing distance. Immediately she lookt over to me and started communicating, even tho my friend started the conversation.
it was evident he had no presence, worst of all she started showing interest and that really demolished him. I told him to keep his chin up and see it as just a fun experiment! none of it really having any impact on our lives! it seemed to somehow motivate him slightly.
He attempted a few more groups, and he missed some more amazing opportunities, which somewhat started to annoy me. At that time he was stearing at women to talk to and they could literally feel his eyes on their shoulders from miles away... so they were turning around, and the second they did, i felt like hiding behind the pavement.
He tried one more, and one of the girls literally placed herself between him and the friend he was talking to and pulled her friend out! At this point in time i was sitting on a far bench, and shaking my head and laughing....tired from all the walking, I was not going to save him anymore.
Moral of the story.
Presence! if you don't have it, why are you even approaching women?
Presence comes from a solid voice tonality, your personal sexual awareness and communication of that to women, your body language!!!!!, and your ability to have fun and have something to bring to the table! But most importantly to realize where shes at, so you can enter her world, and lead her away from it!
CHAT
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