I read somewhere (il post the link later) that girls apparantly admire guys who can go to a bar/club on his own and feel comfortable. Ive always seen this as something that people would percieve as "lonely" or "sad", and its therefore been something I would not particularly choose to do. Is there anyone on this forum who has gone sarging in a bar or club on their own before? Can you also share what the experience was like (i.e. good or bad?). Last weekend I went sarging with a few of my friends (at clubs and bars) which was good, but I have often wondered what it would be like if you went sarging in these places on your own? I believe it could make you more approachable and somewhat less threatening to females as its just "1" of you. What's your thoughts on this?

I don't think thats a bad thing to do. In fact I'm also planning to go all by myself atleast sometimes though I do have friends with whom I go out to bars and clubs usually but the problem (this is something which kinda applies only to me) is that some of those friends are AFCs or they get drunk too much which kinda hurts my game also. Other thing is that if you really don't have your friends as your wings i.e., if they are not into the game then they would usually interrupt your moves or may be even make fun of you (this happens to me) when you do try to open a set which is really not very helpful. It also depends on how many instant friends you can make at the venue itself so it creates social proof and also you don't feel lonely at the venue when you go all alone. Also the girls won't really care if you know those people are really your friends or you've just met them. I personally feel that going alone will create a pressure on me to open more sets. This is my opinion on it. If you do go out alone then please post the FR about your experience.

Thanks for the reply!

There are a few bars and clubs not too far from where I stay so lately I have been briefly visting these places when they are not so busy to see what its like.
So far its been ok actually, but like you say it would be a good idea to start interacting alot more with the people in these venues to increase your confidence and also to become social proof.

I will provide a detailed report of how it goes once ive done it a bit more and for more longer!

Society today has really evolved to a point that going out by yourself is considered sad or lonely.
And I must admit it, I'm a victim of this. Sometimes I get out of work tired, and I want to go to the movies, but everyone is busy, or I don't want to talk to anyone that I end up not going because I don't want to go alone and be sitting in the theater all by myself.
But I mean .. you don't NEED to be with anybody to get a drink at a bar, or watch a movie. People may look at you and they will think "Whats up with that guy"...
But you can't stop your activities for what someone may think.
On another note, I kinda think that "going out alone" is something very courageous to do, because almost no one does it, and it kinda shows that you don't need people to still do the things you want to do.
But then there is also this feeling inside YOU that tells you its not complete what you're doing, like, you're used to go out with your friends and going out alone feels strange, but, it could help your social skills. You could go to a mall, to watch the stores, and talk to the clerks, etc, they don't necessarily have to be girls, but talk to them and you will get a good vibe about it and feel good.
Just do it! Don't mind what people say or think n.n

Mr_Lover_Man,

Great Question. When I started out I really didn't have a wing here in Nashville so I went out alone for a good year before I had someone to go with. Then he moved so I was alone again, LOL. It's really not a big deal. You just have to learn to be comfortable hanging by yourself, working the venue, and get to know your hired guns at your frequent haunts.

After a while of going out I made it a point to befriend the bouncers, shot girls, bartenders, managers, and owners. Since I frequented the same places I always had someone to talk to. Not to mention this got me other perks...many people thought I worked there. LOL. Anyways, when I walked in on a given night I made my rounds saying hi to the regulars and the hired guns before opening. This established my social proof and pre-selection before opening.

In many ways it was hard, but when you're alone you have to keep working. From talking to my friends I worked my way set to set and often merging sets. After merging a few sets I created my own party!

After getting to know many regulars at this point I have a social circle of friends who are former regulars at various places that I roll with now.

Mystery talks about rolling alone if you have to in most of his publications.

A friend of mine Christiano Jr. who is a Natural Game "Brazilian" instructor for Revolution31 also talked about this with me. He said, "Going out by yourself you show you're a secure guy. These are my beliefs and my thoughts. I don't see I'm by myself and alone. Most people don't care if you're there by yourself or not. They don't even think about that stuff, they are in their own world. They don't think look at that loser by himself in the corner. There is nothing wrong with being by yourself.

Sometimes I prefer going by myself as to be with a bad wing. Just buy your drink and you see something you like just approach and go to talking to her. If she asks who you are with you could say, "I'm with you, you are my new friend." Or just be like "I'm by myself...so what, there is nothing wrong with that."

I completely agree with that. You have to learn to be happy with being by yourself and hanging alone. No big deal....

Heck come to think of it, I had a few girls I've dated tell me that they thought it was cool that I'd roll alone the way I do. I explained I roll alone and I meet new friends all night just being social. It ends up being more of a DHV really.

Jon

*Makes me want to roll alone tonight*

_________________
Been around the world twice, Talked to everyone once...

Mr. Lover Man

Yeah, You should try it. I did it yesterday for the first time. Must say I felt kind of lonely in the beginning. I did a huuuuge mistake trying to open up sets too late. Standing next to girls for ages and then saying something stupid. Did not work! . In the end, I met some friends and hang out with them. I did not need to be with them because we did not enter the club together. If you come together you always feel like you have to stick with your buddies. I was apple to meet some other people too. Im not afraid doing it again! U should too

good gaming, buddy!

Just like approach anxiety, the fear of going out alone can be overcome as well.

Just do it. Be a little crazy and try new things. Be comfortable being UNcomfortable. Paradoxical isn't it?

Going out alone, when i was younger, i used to go out alone alot, and belive it or not, it was better then going out with others, expecialy bad wingmen...When u are alone u ahve the chance to shine...u get all geared up, pump ur morale, build confidence...and u jump.
Many times i drew more atention alone then with some1,because i use alot of mystery in my game.U wont be confused for a loner, or a weirdo, but more for a alpha, that doesn't need a pack to hunt.

This is where 'lording' the club/bar is important. In fact, I've learnt that lone-wolf sarging works best when you're not peacocking. I've personally done more solo sarging than with a wing since I got to Asia and had more success than with a 'pack'.

I find its easier to go along with being the life of the party and using being alone to your advantage - you can move from set to set and not restrict it to HBs alone. I like to open a set then also use the "lonely dude looking into his beer" to be my pivot when I go out.

Don't have a problem with it at all and still not averse to havinga wing either.

Enjoy your sarging, bro!

Hey I tried it properly (although brief) the other day, I went to this bar/club and tried to play it cool (repeating some affirmations " I am a confident alpha male" & "I am extremely comfortable going out to clubs alone"). As soon as I came to the club the bouncers/door men seemed friendly towards me so spoke to them briefly before entering the club. When I got inside I took a brief stroll up to the bar which is on the otherside of the club (they have 2 bars one in front and one at back, so I went to the one at back to give me more reason to broswe through the room on the way there). Waited to be served by the bar tender who later tells me they dont accept card payments at that bar so I had to go to the one in front (this worked out good actually because it gave me reason to go to the front bar). Whilst waiting to be served at the bar in front (it was pretty busy in this one) I noticed a few HB's looking over at me in different sets which was a nice little confidence boost for me. Then one HB7 started talking to me about how long it is taking to be served and was saying that because the bar staff are female they would take longer to serve her. She was with a mixed group of guys and girls so I was thinking she was just speaking to be friendly so I started a brief convo with her but didnt intend to take it into any direction other than a little more social proof in the club. As I continued to wait longer one of her female friend (HB7) started talking to me again I just replied in a friendly manner and didnt take the conversation in any direction. Continued to wait more and the HB7 who talked to me intially started trying to talk to me again about waiting at the bar etc I then decided to take the convo into more direction and started asking her questions back and being cocky funny (in a subtle way) which made her laugh, and continued to make jokes with her about waiting at the bar and her not being served. I then said I would get the attention of one of the female bar tenders in which I did and then I said to the HB7 to order her drinks and il order mine straight after (making us basically get served together) which she thanked me. She gave me her number and we had a k-close (it was only a pek tho as i was playing it cool (maybe too cool)). Also whilst I was speaking to her, the guys she were with were also trying to conversate with me. After this I hung out until I finished my 2 drinks (buy one get one free) and I left the club and then went to my mates house after. It was a nice experience and u dont really feel like a loner if u occupy urself in some shape or form i.e. ur walking to a bar to get a drink, talking with people, waiting to get served, playing on the fruit machine, dancing (although thats another barrier i need to break when going out clubbing alone). All and all it was a great experience even though I only spent a brief amount of time in the club. I would definately do it again but maybe a bit longer next time, and a note to myself to work the room a little more to build more raport in general.

Thanks for the encouragement guys I really appreciate.

I have always been a Lone Wolf Type. They key is that you need to be comfortable with this. Girls can sense if you're not. If you like to hang out alone and feel comfortable in a bar, club, or cafe by yourself you will not look strange. You look like you belong.

Do girls like this? Well yes, some do. In fact this makes it really easy to meet another Lone Wolf type, which surprisingly there are many. My standard line is something like, "Why is someone as pretty as you here all alone." Works every time.
You only look lonely if you act lonely. I might be alone, but I am not lonely.

Being alone forces you to interact with other people, I just talk to whoever is around. The bartender, the bouncer, other lonely dudes, couples with their baby in the bar, anyone who looks interesting. This way it doesn't seem strange when you approach a cute girl, you are the life of the party talking to everyone in the bar.

My latest experience was at a Cafe. I was sitting by myself outside and this very cute chick sat down. She was pretending to do school work but kept looking around hoping for someone to approach her. I watched her for a while and finally just asked her If I could join her. The excitement in her eyes was incredible. It was as if I was full-filling her long dreamed about Hollywood fantasy of being a approached by a guy at a cafe. After a few minutes it was easy to convince her to go on an insta-date with me to the park. One of the most exciting PU's I have had yet.

I prefer to go out alone. I've said this before, at least if I fail, I won't have my friends around to see it.

Part of being confident is being comfortable with your surroundings and yourself.

You can sum up most people that 'travel alone' into one of two people:
1. A loner / loser
2. A social butterfly / confident person

Look at most of the people that fall into the first category and the characteristics begin to repeat: they walk around nervously, with a tight posture and quick steps. They glance around awkwardly to see if anyone is staring at them, or even notices them at all. They look at they're feet as they walk. They often don't smile, and avoid most social interactions at all costs. They like to keep to themselves for a reason of their own, and confidence is clearly something they lack.

The second category, however, is on the opposite end of the spectrum. They share no characteristics with a loner; confident people / social butterflies keep their heads up high, making eye contact with people as they pass them. They emanate a positive aura that seems entrancing and contagious to most other people - most can't help but notice them walk by. They smile, have a jump in their step, talk to everyone (even if its brief) and have a loose and comfortable posture.

There is quite the obvious difference here.

Women love confident men. Confidence is a trait that they absolutely die for, and confidence is a trait that man #2 absolutely has. You see, whether alone or in a group, it only affects your psychological frame of mind; how you see yourself has a direct correlation with how other people see you. You should really ask yourself, are you comfortable with going out alone?

If you are not, then work on that until you are. I wouldn't sarge alone until you are comfortable being alone.

I was at the fair the other day, and decided that I would use the time wisely and practice my PUA stuff. I walked alone between groups, approaching sets whether I knew them or not, with either natural unrecited openers or the canned ones. Both worked great. The night was experimental, and not exactly successful per se, but that was only because of my skill as a PUA, it had nothing to do with my group-to-group mentality.

In the end, it comes down to you.

Are you comfortable sarging alone?

_________________
-Sharplin
My journal:
sharplins-journal-vt84603.html?highlight=

Good question, but what makes a King a King? The fact he rules over other people or the fact that he is the "alpha male". I would agree with what you have already stated and say the latter.

There are some people who may have a mixture of both points in certain situations such as people who thrive and oust with confidence when they are with there "pack" (who can emit this same energy as the person in point 2) but when they are a "lone wolf" they move more into the point 1 characteristics.

The point I am trying to make is that confidence generally means someone is very confident in their ability to do something they already know they are good at doing. A man that may be confident at being a car mechanic might not neccesarily be confident at fixing computers although they may have some idea. A man who is confident at coaching a football team may not neccesarily feel confident when doing things alone.

So I guess the ultimate point here is the confidence that someone would need to Sarge alone is the confidence of being "sociable" and being able to interact with all kinds of people, and has no fear of being alone.

Exactly.
The ultimate point of this is to be comfortable on your own. If you are not, you will tend toward the point 1 characteristics. If you are, you will be alpha. Most of this is psychological too, if you tell yourself you are alpha, you will naturally adopt most of the alpha characteristics without even thinking; it's based on the nature of human interaction and thinking.

_________________
-Sharplin
My journal:
sharplins-journal-vt84603.html?highlight=