This is a draft of the first chapter of my memoirs. I'm considering writing out all my life experiences and then putting it all together in a book someday. I'm 19 and have my life ahead of me but I might aswell start this now.

Sunday July 19th, 2009

I woke up this morning (3 pm) and decided that I need to start writing down all the fucked up experiences and adventures that I have been getting myself into over the recent years. I know for a fact there will be many more to come, trouble finds me. It would be nice to get these down before others overtake the current ones and while they’re still fresh in my mind.



I suppose what motivated me to do this is the events that transpired last night. I’m currently awaiting trial for 4 charges from a few months back, yet I managed to almost get arrested, which would have seriously fucked me over right now. Apparently this is me taking it easy and not getting myself into trouble… I can’t fuck up right now, not when I’ve been accepted to university on a different continent. My future is on the line. The only thing standing in my way is my sense of judgment and this fucking court date which keeps getting pushed back closer and closer to October, the day I’m supposed to be sitting in my first class.



Back to last night. Actually lets go back to last week. My good friend Han Solo managed to get two pictures of an all access pass to a concert festival which has been going on since the beginning of this month. Having known me for a while, he knows all about my fraud-full past, the fake ids, the selling bus passes to undercover bacon scenario, so he sends me these pics.



We go to a show on Thursday afternoon, make our way backstage and watch the show from there and get a few freebies. It was a good time. He tried to sell weed to the rapper and maybe get us into the tour bus, but they were leaving the city right then and there. The reason we tried this was because he sold some to a big name rapper the weekend before, got some autographs, but no chill sesh. I promised that if I had a chance to smoke dro with someone famous I would break my 5 month weed soberness.

There’s supposed to be another big rapper performing on Saturday (yesterday), but Han Solo can’t make it because he’s in New York at the time. I still wanted to go the concert even though I’m not one to listen to rap consciously. But, backstage passes only come along once in a while. I’ll take Cate.

I go out downtown with Han Solo that night. There’s only one place that’s any good on Thursdays and we’ve been going there a lot this summer. I was supposed to meet up with Becca that night but she flaked. I did, however, see Brigitte, good friend that I’ve known since kindergarten and we’ve lost touch over the past two years so it was nice to catch up. I wasn’t on top of my game that night, I blame Becca. I wait with Solo for his bus. We decide to open a set of two girls smoking a spliff. We rip on them for looking sketchy as a cop rolls by. I tell them that Solo sold weed to that rapper. We run some game on them and only the brunette is contributing to the conversation, the blonde appears to be lost in her phone. Our website (www.mPUA.info) comes up in the convo, I give them both a business card for my graphic design summer business. I just printed them out the last week and love giving them out when hitting on girls. I never directly ask for a phone number, it’s always either make a plan to go somewhere together and “how should we contact eachother” and now “If you need a website for your acting carreer here’s my card”. After a few minutes it starts to rain a little and they go for shelter under a roof without telling us. It’s an IOD so we don’t follow them because that would be DLV, we just back under another roof. We discuss how that conversation went when suddenly I get a text message from an unknown number: “boobs.” Puzzled I wonder who I gave my number to recently, there was Brigitte but she would most likely have a Montreal area code number. Oh, the two set from a second ago… right. I inquire and the blonde admits to it. I rip on her a little for her level of maturity and it being the worst pickup line I’ve seen in a while. Right then Solo’s bus comes, happens to also be the brunette’s bus, she asks Cindy if she’s coming: “Nah” …score.

We chat a little, then she says she doesn’t have anywhere to sleep tonight since she just ‘missed’ her bus and lives an hour outside of the city. Score. I laugh, ask under what name should I save her number in my phone. Cindy. Tease her until she basically asks me to sleep with her. I tell her I’m not that easy, she has to work for it. “ You need a total of 15 points to bed me. You’re at about 8, that’s more than half, good job, you get a spot on my couch.” –high five- I tell her I live a 20 minute walk from here and she has that amount of time to earn those 7 points. I never gave her that 15th point, she basically had to rape me to get what she wanted. I told her that I’d take her to the concert on Saturday. FUCK. I had already told Cate I’d take her.



I met Cate a few weeks ago at the beach. I saw her from across the parking lot sitting alone on the grass away from the the sand. I had to open her. Walked up, noticed her chihuahua and said “you don’t need to hide because of your puppy, nobody would notice him.” She smiles and mentions to her beer “I’d be breaking two laws”

“Now you’re only breaking one. What are you doing drinking in the middle of the day anyaway?”

“I’m having boyfriend troubles.”



Score.



She later changed her story to “broke up with my boyfriend” We made plans for a shawarma spot downtown that has free shisha on Sunday and Monday, I told her “I don’t plan that far into the future so I’ll have to get back to you to set a specific time” “OK, my number is……”



I decided to take Cate to the concert since I hadn’t seen her this week.



So I guess I have to write about last night eh. I’m gonna take a break now, I’ll write it tomorrow. I’ve replayed the scenario over and over in my head for the past 24hours, don’t want to do it all again in great detail. Not right now. Peace.


I’ve decided to run a blog about this work in progress: memoirs.mpua.info