| Well, after a bit of scepticism about going out sarging, I just decided to do it as a spur of the moment thing for my first time about 2 weeks ago. This was before I properly did my research into Style's 'The Game' and the Mystery Method, although I had read a few pointers. I'm now familiar with Mystery's model (A1-3, bounce, C1-3, time bridge/bounce, S1-3) I'm a sarge newbie, so I need some advice to improve my game.
It was extremely quiet for a Saturday night, there was only myself and a couple of other people for about an hour and a half, but things started picking up eventually. I had a couple games of pool in the back of the pub.
So basically it starts getting busier and I’ve claimed a corner section to myself back in the main section. I noticed a few IOIs from blonde girl (HB8) in a two set as I was walking by. She made eye contact, kept it for a couple of seconds, looked away and touched her hair. I'm thinking that what I could’ve done then was approach and open the two set, although I don’t know if this might’ve came across as a bit creepy as they had previously seen me sitting alone and I had no intentions of meeting up with friends that night. Instead, I went back to my seating area. I’ve been very aware of my posture for quite a while and have gotten a few comments about looking much more confident from a few girls I know, so it’s good to get feedback on that. After sitting down again, I noticed the HB8’s back was turned to me and her friend was peering over her shoulder. This happened a couple of times.
A little while later, I noticed a girl (HB7) pace back and forth about 6 feet away from me holding her mobile phone. There was a one seater around 6 feet away from me which I noticed her come back and take a seat on. I took this as a sign that she’s probably waiting for someone. Out of the corner of my eye, I noticed her head turning towards my direction a couple of times. After about 10 seconds, I signalled her to come over. When she came over, I smiled, asked to talk to her for couple of seconds and offered her a seat. She was smiling, and accepted the seat. Now I don’t know if I should have signalled her over, but looking back on it, I personally feel as if this could be seen as a compliance test and even social proof as she approached me. Any opinions? My body language was confident and relaxed, and I wasn’t directly facing her when she approached.
So we end up talking. I felt as if the conversation generally did go quite well, I got a few IOIs and she was asking questions. But due to my lack of knowledge in the game at the time, I feel like I was trying to build rapport with her (Comfort 1) right off the bat, as I wasn’t yet aware of the importance of kino, social proof and DHV routines.
About 5 minutes later, her friend came as expected. I smiled, and her friend hugged me hello. After a little while, I offered her a seat but she mentioned that another group of friends was actually in the same place. So my target offered me to come along and join the group. Like I said earlier, I wasn’t totally aware of social proofing at the time, but it did feel like I was being noticed walking through the pub with 2 girls, especially after people had seen me sitting alone.
So we get to the group and it’s a 6 set, 4 of which were guys plus the 2 girls. This is where things just started to go bad. The seating space could only hold 6 people, and is in like a little booth where they face each other. There were no other chairs around, so I felt like the loser that was standing in front of this 6 set. I tried making conversation with the group, which I realise now consisted of mainly questions, which is a big no-no. I noticed that I was losing the attention of the group, so I said my goodbyes and said I was going to look for my friends. At this point I headed off home.
This was my first time out sarging and I just went with the intent of having fun, approaching and gaining that little bit of extra experience. If anyone has any advice for me on what I could try next time, it would be much appreciated.
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