It's Monday night. Zar and I are heading out to our usual spots to see how it is on a Monday since we haven't been there on a Monday.
I show up a few minutes before him and it was DEAD. There were only like two cute girls in there.
Zar shows up and we do our usual, and that's walk around to all the local bars to scope out what's going down. NADA!
We end up back at our "main" spot and just chill out talking about what we're gonna do on Thursday since that'll be our official day off the Sarge-A-Thon. He has like 4 or 5 solid numbers that he's talked to and that he's trying to figure out who he wants to Day2.
They're all hunnies, so any of them should be good. LOL! Picky fucker.
We're about to take off to go somewhere, get some food, SOMETHING and Zar spots a two set. He goes in with his opener and BAM! They answer it, set didn't really fly wide open, but they were down to chat.
They talk about school and what they were doing that day. They kind of keep us involved. I felt like it was a blow out, but Zar kept himself in the conversation. On our way out he says his name and the girl on the other side of the table asks where he's from. He tells her, and she spits some word from another language and Zar pulls out his phone and tells her they're kicking it.
NUMBER CLOSE.
They start to vibe, I talk to her Asian friend about how my roommates call me "Token" and how they bust on me for being the minority in the crib. LOL!
She start to laugh. We stay in set a bit longer, they finally are hooked and we're all vibing really well. We end up taking off up the street to another bar in another city and it was dead there as well.
End up stopping by three bars near my crib, NO GO. Then I start calling my old friends who know the local bar scene and they give some suggestions. We take to one and end up inside with a bunch of old people that are just listening to the worst music.
Zar and I end up outside and I'm on the phone again while he's looking up some pubs on his phone. A strange girl walks up and asks if we saw a stripper leave the bar. Zar and I look at one another like, "WTF?" Then tell her we only saw a girl in a VW Bug.
She said that's her and gets on her phone. While she's on her phone the girl says that her friend thought I was hot and that Zar was her type. Then she walks off after the oddest conversation on her phone.
We're just left looking at each other clowning on the chick who just left. Then the Bug pulls up next to Zar's car and Stripper opens the door and hands Zar a half eaten mini pizza from Pizza Hut.
Now the fun begins.
We're out front of the bar with Stripper and UG girl. I'm just watching Strippers body language the whole time trying to figure out what drug she's on. She couldn't be on meth of coke, she was too mellow. Chick just seemed like a pill head.
I look at Zar and ask him what he wants to do. He has this grin on his face when answering, "I dunno." LOL! Love winging with Zar, dude likes to push the limits sometimes.
Stripper asks if we're down to chill and we say yeah. We follow her and UG in her beetle to the back parking lot to park our cars to walk over to their apartment.
Once we get in, the place is a complete mess. Strippers miniature dog runs the joint. Stuff is scattered. Yup, I was right. She's a pill head. Two over the counter pill bottles left wide open and a daily pill case on the counter. I always enjoy when people try and make their habits look "normal."
Anyways.
In my head I know what's up. I'm not dumb. But I wasn't feeling it. UG girl comes out of her room in just a Tee and offers Zar a smoke. He takes it and smokes on the patio. I'm standing there looking at Stripper like, "Damn, only if you didn't resemble my sister so damn much."
This chick literally was my sister ten years ago if she was an extrovert. Same height, same hair color, same manorisms, mellow like a pill head, drives a bug and strips.
The one night I get a stripper handing me pussy on a silver platter and I get one like this.
WHY? WHY ME GOD?!
So I've kicked a few puppies, stole some candy from some kids and denied helping a few old ladies across the street.
THIS IS HOW YOU REPAY ME?
I look at Stripper and tell her I'ma have my boy run and get me some food. I look at Zar and say lets go. Zar's looking at me like I'm crazy. I know. We get outside and start walking for the car. We're busting up at how odd this night has turned into.
I told Zar I wasn't down but I'll wing. He says the only way we can pull it off is if I tell Stripper I'm gay. I didn't think I could pull myself to doing it.
I was about to let my ego get the best of me and say no. But I'm down. You're not a wingman if you're not helping your boy get laid right? right.
We drive through Del Taco to get me some grub and then up the street to the 7-11 to get Zar some rubbers. As were on our way back we're coming up with how I'm going to break the news that I'm "gay."
We park, go back to the apartment. Zar knocks a few times and then we enter. Nobody's home. We walk back to the car and once we get into the parking lot BOTH of the girls are there talking to two other dudes. LOL!
Stripper walks up and is pretty much telling Zar to play wing man since Zar has been telling her that UG isn't his type. Then Zar looks at me and says, "Well you should tell them before it gets too late."
They continue to talk for a minute and then I come out of my closet and say, "Well I can't hook up, 'cause I'm gay."
Chick throws up her hand and says, "Bye." She walks off. We walk back to Zar's car and we're off.
Zar's breaking down of how that could of turned out. She was either going to do what she did, or since she was such a freak, she might have been like, "Okay that's fine lets hook up."
Before I get out of his car I tell him I choded but for the right reasons. Then I told him I'd take him to my sisters crib to introduce him to her to show him how close they looked. He laughs.
Then I throw him a peace sign and say, "Lates."
CHAT