hello,

this is my first field report on this forum. i hope to get some feedback and share my experience that may possibly help others in the future. anyway, here is my story:

i was sitting at the cafe reading when a hb7 sat near me. after about 10 minutes of hesitation, i decided to walk up to her. i opened with "excuse me, but i've been travelling alot and haven't been around. can u recommend a good place to go yoga this saturaday?" (this is a variation of shark's opener in attract and date btw).

she said some location that was way far from here, and i could tell from her accent she wasn't from around here. i pulled up a chair and sat down in front of her, and continued talking. so I asked her if she was an international student, she said yes and said i was new here and didn't know places really. she said she wasnt from around here and her commute was pretty far.

at that moment i felt like i was trying to pull threads out of thin air. didn't know what to talk about. just kept going on about the area. then i decided to do style's jealous gf opener. but before she let me, she pulled out her phone and said, sorry i have to use the phone. at that point i excused myself from the table.

i went back to my seat, wanted to leave but decided to stay a bit. she left the cafe about 2 minutes after i went back to my seat.

in general i think what i did wrong was, my voice tone was anxious and fast, i didn't hold good eye contact, and i didn't add any value to the interaction. the phone thing kind of put me by surprised. maybe i couldve stayed and rode it out and continued gaming. but i felt self conscious with the signs she was giving me. what do u guys think?

yeah u lost her... u said u didnt know what to say, so she probably got bored and just excused herself...unless u r experienced, work on some lines that u could say b4 hand instead of just an opener

I have the same problem too, i would go in with a smile, and they would smile back, but 2 mins later i just stumbles...gotta keep on workin

I think that in these kind of situations the best thing to do is open with a false time constraint (so she doesn`t suspect anything) and then say your opener and then your routine as WUSTA says.
I have been building confidence and working into feeling confortable in my own skin. Remember girls are ultra sensitive and they can tell when someone is nervous.

Also maybe the 10 minutes of hesitation, probably involved glancing over every so often, gives you the creep look.

I'm relatively new to this too, but once you get past the first approach, things get easier, you become more comfortable, and then the problems encountereed this time won't happen next time.