Hey all,

just wanna share something which I learnt today. Went out with intention to sarge, but didnt feel good about it so started going through beliefs, doing a little meditation and voice talk etc, felt a little better. Really wanna improve at this so still despite not feeling great I went out regardless.

This was when I noticed I only started feeling good and confident, when I was out in public. I would notice whatever about people or start to imagine somebody judging me and an attitude/belief would come up "who cares there just people" and I would feel confident.

It was then that I remembered something else. Since breaking up for college a week ago for summer, my inner game has actually gone down! I still hold and practice the same beliefs and whatnot, but definitely dont feel as strong as when I was at school.


INNER GAME IS BUILT BY OUTER GAME: this is the realization I've had. You can say as many affirmations and whatnot about whatever on your own in your room, but the only behavior you can effectively change in that environment is how you act in your room.

So basically, what i have got from this, is that in order to change ourselves in a certain environment, we must put ourselves in that environment over and over.

My only issue is that this makes the whole idea of "inner game" kinda weak, if it can fall apart from not talking to girls for a while, so any answers as to how to gain solid inner game which can never be broken despite exterior circumstances?

_________________
I refuse to let fear be a problem

Id rather die on my feet than live on my knees

Dude, you're getting there... but not quite.

To have good inner game means to be able to make your environment a product of you, instead of you being a product of your environment.

I still see you're a product of environment: you use tricks, techniques, and outside circumstances to define how you feel about yourself or to boost your feelings. Hell, you clearly state you need to be around other people to feel good about yourself, which is NOT confidence. The need to gain approval from others and/or feel better about yourself just because you're socializing (i.e. the need to feel important) stem from a sense of insecurity.

What happens around you is a result from what you decide it should be (to a certain extent). For example, other people don't piss you off. You decide to get mad about something they say or do. An argument happens, maybe a fist fight, but they're all results from what you deep inside decided.

Don't project the responsibility of security on other people, tricks or objects. That's using crutches. Truly being confident is not using jack sh*t to feel awesome and to feel awesome regardless of other people's presence and comments.

Work on your confidence.