Even if I still seem normal and alright to mostly everyone I talk to I tell myself that's not good enough because I want to be like those cool guys who you just want to hang out with and treat them with tons of respect as soon as you meet them. I know you got to like yourself first but I've tried to find things I like about myself and I can only find a couple and on top of that I put myself down every time I'm not that cool guy I pictured in my head, If you've read this far your awesome and I'd appreciate it if you can give me some pointers or advice on just being myself while gaining selfesteem

Wow... really sucks that you feel that way about yourself dude. I wish I knew out the top of my head something you could read that would help with your problem, but I don't. The only thing that comes to mind at the moment is the Inner Game link. I personally haven't really read anything in there, but I guess it would be a good place to start.

As for personal advice, be yourself and believe in yourself. Now that in itself is kind of a contradiction since most people that are beginners at using game are not really being themselves. Which is why when you continue to do it, it will become second nature to you and more of your actual self will start coming out through your game.

Find a hobby you really enjoy doing. I started learning to play the guitar. It was something that I felt made me a more well rounded person, and wasn't a bad thing to have in my pocket when using pickup.

Respect is earnt. What have the cool guys done to earn your respect?

You want to feel you are good enough, then start pushing your boundaries. Knowing what you can achieve is good. Being able to push yourself through the pain and achieve things that seem beyond your limits is what what makes you know you are good enough for any woman.

Work hard at everything you do and give everything your best.

hey dude,
this post helps alot with your inner frame stuff
Its called Frame Control etc etc, its a sticky in this board.
But otherwise, honestly you need to sit down and look at yourself. Ask yourself, what are you really fucking good at? Like what in the world are you better at than anyone else? I can almost guarantee that there is something, maybe even a few things. If you can't think of something, ask your best friend. Just, 'man, what am i awesome at?' they will let you know what you're awesome at. and think about it dude, if youre that awesome at that, why cant you be that awesome at anything you want to be awesome at? Your ability to learn is only limited by time. and youve got plenty of it. Just kick all of your negative thoughts out of your head next time you get out of bed, get dressed up in something that makes you feel like a king (a suit maybe?), look yourself in the mirror and tell yourself that youre the man. Then go out and do stuff that puts you in a really good mood. Get drunk with your buddies. Go talk to some girls. Hang out with someone you really connect with. Play some video games. Whatever you want to do, AS LONG AS IT MAKES YOU HAPPY. If it makes you happy, chances are youre good at it. Even if its something as simple as like Halo, or making new friends out of shopkeepers, or anything. Once you're awesome at something, the confidence racks up.

Good luck man, pm me if you wanna talk about anything.

A.

Nate,

The way we think, feel and behave is directly caused by the beliefs we have about ourselves, life, the world, other people, etc.

If you can't believe you're good enough, you gotta have the belief "I'm not good enough". I stroooongly recommend you check out Morty Lefkoe's work.

Here's a free belief-elimination program with which you can get rid of the belief "I'm not good enough": (The forum won't let me post URL's, so just google recreate your life. It's the first result that comes up).