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Well, I have to deal with social anxiety. Mainly this happens in public places when I'm not talking to people. When I do talk to people I sometimes get anxious and have the monkey chatter in my head, but other times I can occasionally get lost in the conversation and just connect with the person, which seems to shut off the junk talk in my head.
I have always wondered why my mind stops the negativity in some social interactions which then go well, while other interactions are completely uncomfortable and awkward. It appears after reading this book that it is down to finding myself in the moment, without my shy identity or fear of the future.
However, I cannot call on this state when I want to. It happens or it doesn't - most the time it doesn't. It is what I am aiming towards, but I just don't quite have a grip on how to get there.
Odd. My anxiety is before and during approach. After doing the Newbie Mission
twice, the first five minutes each time just sucked for me. I was grinding my teeth at one point! After the initial 5 minutes, my fear has peaked and then starts to subside, by the 10 min mark I'm feeling "normal" with the activity and progressing as I should.
My issue clearly has to do with over-analyzing beforehand, exaggerating negative outcomes, and amplifying what should be normal anticipation and excitement into shear terror. Medication has helped in the past (Valium), but I don't want to rely on that forever....I want to stand on my own two feet and be able to walk up to a perfect stranger and ask about the weather or what time it is without having a case of flop-sweat.
