I find myself saying this a lot but never really broken it down properly. The key to great inner game is simply a combination of 2 things:

1. Positive thinking nomatter what.

2. Not giving a shit.


Remember this, keep it in your head as a reference incase you get stuck. Two things. It's easy to remember. This will help you out in ALL aspects of pickup, and life in general. If you're thinking about a situation you're in with a girl, look at these 2 points and ask yourself if you're following them. If not, get to it. Sharpish. That can be easier said than done, however, so we're gonna take a look at the path to internalising these 2 qualities.


Not giving a shit is easy. Here is how:

1. Understand women. This means knowing why they do the things they do. Why they say certain things when they mean something completely different. Why they're afraid to make certain decisions. Why they're jealous of other girls and why they talk shit about them. You not only need to know this stuff, you have to realise it. Be able to put yourself in the shoes of a woman and really think as she thinks. Feel as she feels.

2. Get rid of limiting beliefs. Wealth means nothing. Appearance means nothing. Material goods mean nothing. None of these things affect your ability to do what you want and get where you need to be. Go back to the first point... when you understand women you will realise how little these things mean to them. If you find yourself thinking about how fat or thin or poor you are, or how you can't attract women despite how successful you are in other aspects of life, you do not truly understand them and need to work on that more. That means making friends and paying attention to them without trying to manipulate them, and spending all your time figuring out how to sleep with them.

3. Realise your own value. Write down 10 reasons any woman would be lucky to be with you. Look over it until you feel a surge of confidence take over you and you can't help but smile. You will realise that if a woman has a problem with you, it is exactly that. Her problem. There is a fine line between realising your value and being arrogant however; be careful not to cross it.

4. Make decisions based on logic, not emotion. This is one of the hardest things to grasp but believe me, it hurts more if you follow your heart and it never ever works out the way you want it to. It is easy to become attached to a woman especially if you haven't got many options at some stage. Do not fall into that trap - call it quits and avoid it messing with your head. She either likes you or she doesn't, and if she doesn't, don't try to figure her out. Just leave it, simple as that. I can rhyme off reason after reason and give you a seriously long pep talk but it's easier just to say this: don't fucking bother with her, no exceptions. She is not special or unique. She isn't somehow different from the rest and it just has to work out. Don't kid yourself, you deserve better than that.

So, to recap, the key to not giving a shit is as follows - understand women, and realise your own worth. You are equal, or higher value. No exceptions. Realise that nothing is your problem because anything she says or thinks is outside of your control. All you can do is lay your cards on the table and deal with the consequences. If you cannot control something you must embrace it. No exceptions. Use your brain and don't be a pussy - treat every woman you meet exactly the same. Not only will you be more congruent, but it will stop you making mistakes. You start changing things to suit one particular girl and everything goes to shit. Then you try to figure her out, and it just gets worse. Don't do it.


Alright, so what about positive thinking? Simple. Look at something negative that happened recently and force yourself to see the positive aspects. When it comes to women, the good always outweighs the bad. There is always something, and I challenge you to come up with a scenario which is 100% negative (short of you being killed, that is). I wanted to keep this short because inner game is exactly that. It's inside of you, and you don't need to read piles and piles of information to bring it out. You need action, and this is the action you need to be taking. Get started and have fun.

I think this pretty much sums it up. Solid post man.

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Damn Solomon, the admins need to change your Member Title to something like Postmaster General, because you have been putting up some awesome material! These are some great points to keep in the back of my head - it really is amazing how simple the principles of staying positive and not giving a fuck are. Although truly internalizing them - and not regressing at the first sign of adversity - can be a challenge. Hell, I'm Slavic, and negativity is in our genetic code

Good read

Hey guys! I just wrote up some stuff on rejection in response to another thread, and felt it was fitting to add it here. Enjoy!


Solomon II on "rejection"


You don't actually have to embrace rejection, you just have to understand some things.

1. Rejection is inevitable. Somewhere, at some stage, a woman is going to reject you. So many factors are out of your control, all you can do is lay your cards on the table and see what happens. You cannot prevent every woman you meet from turning you away, and you know this. So why does it bother you so much?

Ego. Pride. (bullshit)

You don't want women taking an adverse reaction to you. You don't want people around you to think you're a failure. You don't want your friends to make fun of you. You don't want her to think badly of you and tell her friends. Your fear of this is so great that in your mind it's better to avoid even the slightest chance of this happening... and that is what causes AA in the first place. If you say you don't care about any of that stuff, and you still can't approach, you need to stop kidding yourself right now.

Why do you care so much about the opinions of other people? Why do you let them dictate your decisions when their opinions don't matter and have no effect on you? Do you realise how ridiculous that is? If you know who you are, and you're happy in yourself, then you'll realise what I'm on about here. Do what you want because it makes you happy and because you want to do it. Fuck other people, they don't define you. I know I'm not a loser, and I know I'm good with women because of my experiences, and nomatter how much other people say otherwise it won't change a god damn thing. Rejection happens, it's not personal. Like I said before, there are so many things which are out of your control when you approach a woman:

She isn't looking for anyone right now.
She just got out of an abusive relationship.
She is having family problems.
She is having a bad day.
She is batshit crazy.
She is a lesbian.
She is waiting on her boyfriend to show up.
She loves her boyfriend and would genuinely never cheat.

And on and on and on... you have no control over these things. All you can really do is find out if she's into you, and you can only do that if you approach her. A quick word on boyfriends; they don't lie about that shit. If a girl is into you, she will not play the boyfriend card even if she does have one. Until the morning after, that is. They do this so the responsibility falls on your shoulders and they don't have to feel bad about it.


2. Rejection is necessary. Not every woman is suited to you, and if any of the above things factor into the equation then you're really better off not getting to know her at this stage in time.

Read that over and over until it clicks. The girl is doing you a favour by rejecting you, for crying out loud. I mean it, get this into your head and really realise it.

When you first see a woman the only thing you know about her, the only reason you approach her in the first place, is because she is attractive. That's it. You don't know shit about her... so why do you care if she likes you or not anyway? It'd be different if it was a girl you'd known for years and you were worried about fucking up the friendship or something, but this is a random girl you're never gonna see ever again. Why do you care? Oh that's right, it's your ego again. This comes back to accepting that not every woman is gonna be into you. I will say this again - all you can do is approach her and find out if she is or not. If you don't approach, you'll never know. What have you got to lose exactly? Stop worrying about your little ego, your pride being hurt. Shit happens, be strong. I approach every woman in the exact same way. I treat them all the same, and I've been turned down by some really attractive girls... other girls who were even better looking (and had nicer personalities) were seriously into me. It's not the approach, it's the girl.

And here's an interesting thing. Why are AFC's frustrated? Because they don't approach... not because they don't know what they're doing. If an average guy who had no idea what he was doing approached as many girls as I do, he would still get the same results... believe that. The only thing that really sets us apart from them is that we're actually approaching girls. You have all this knowledge, all this confidence, and you're not doing anything with it because of your silly little ego and the fear of your pride being hurt. Be a man, grow some balls and get your ass over there to talk to her.

awesome stuff dude! everything you've said is very true... Looking forward to that Australia trip! lol

Haha yeah man!

I actually wanna say something on "its not the approach, its the girl". A lot of guys do approaches and when they don't go to plan they spend ages calibrating what they left out or did improperly etc, trying to make it perfect, when in fact they weren't really doing anything so wrong. That's maybe a little strong because yeah, a lot of guys make mistakes and it is important to correct them, however if the girl is really into you it doesn't matter. That exact same approach repeated again on a girl who was into them would work just fine. This is why AFC's do get laid and do get girls occasionally. It's not because they happened to just "do it right", it's because the girl was into them and didn't care.

Think about that.

Great post I am upping your rep power. Thanks for your perspective.
Peace.

another ferociously good post, think about compiling them into a book.

seriously.

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[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=6wS5xOZ7Rq8[/youtube]

I've been using Nick Nolte for a while, but I think I'm gonna switch to not giving a fuck.

Tight post, bra.

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Haha stormy that was awesome... added to my faves.