Garbage Self Esteem



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 Post subject: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Fri Sep 13, 2013 7:52 pm 
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I'm a college student with a low self esteem. I'm very shy, have little to no sense of humor and look below average. I have hairy hands, legs and chest. I have just 1-2 friends but I don't think they are real friends and they both are gay. I behave really stupid in social situations like I would ask people to repeat things and cannot do simple math like 3*5=15 even though I got the highest in one of the most advanced classes last semester. No one has ever told me "You are awesome/amazing" or "I like _____ about you". My parents have never talked to me nicely we always fight, so i have stopped contact. I don't know how to sing or dance. I have a horrible voice; many people ask me to repeat myself.
In class I have asked some girls if they can study with me. 2 of them have said no with weird excuses like "I don't live in town", "I cannot study in a group". 2 others have agreed and gave phone numbers but when I text they don't even respond. Next time in class one of them changed her seat (she used to sit next to me). I saw the other and she says "I cannot I have a friends birthday".

Will I ever have a chance? Is it worth staying alive?


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 Post subject: Re: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Mon Nov 04, 2013 10:54 am 
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don't give up mate

just keeping moving forward.

things I do when I feel down on myself is volunteer work and or go out in nature.

these thing make you realize there is a lot of good in the world.


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 Post subject: Re: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Wed Nov 13, 2013 7:02 am 
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fitandalertbrain,

Stay strong. Try to join a club like Rotaract Club in your area. This way, you have more chance to socialize and to build up your self-esteem. Some Rotaract Club always participate in charitable activities.

You can also join Toastmasters Club (a great public speaking club). You can greatly improve your speaking skills and will greatly contribute to your self-development.

Do try out this two things and let us know how it goes. All the best, brother ;-)


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 Post subject: Re: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Wed Nov 13, 2013 8:11 am 
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Great thing that you tried to put yourself out there man! Keep on trying!!

I would also recommend trying to take some classes in improving your voice, it will definitely help in a lot of ways, or you can go to a laugher club i think that would do some good as well..

I would also recommend starting at some sport, personally i think MMA is the best to go for, first of all you will get more confidence by your health improvements... It is also a pretty cool sport, so i might give you some sort of prestige!
Also it will definitely help going in a sports club, and just talking to other people, it will make you better at social things!

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 Post subject: Re: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Wed Nov 20, 2013 1:26 am 
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Simple case of low self-esteem and confidence. I started out like you too, now I can't believe the type of guy I've become. It's all in your mind and you can easily change your mind.

I would take some time learning about inner game and the subconscious mind and such before trying to make outward changes to your life because no matter how much you try to change your life, until you create change in your (subconscious) mind first, you'll keep reverting back to your old patterns of low self-esteem.

I'm not telling you to stop trying to make outward changes like working out and meeting people, I'm just recommending you train your mind along with making external changes. The external changes like changing your health and meeting people and such will improve effortlessly when your mind and belief systems are rewired.

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 Post subject: Re: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Fri Dec 06, 2013 4:26 am 
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We all experience problems with self-esteem at certain times in our lives.Focus on behaviors not thoughts. Work on your own boundaries.


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 Post subject: Re: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Wed Jan 15, 2014 12:16 am 
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I just wanted to take a moment to talk about a key thing that this guy is doing, that is actually one of the main causes of low self-confidence and self esteem.

It's focus.

If you read this post, this guy just hammered with stuff he isn't good at, does not have in life, what is
bad and what's not working. Not once did he mention something he is good at, or something that is
working or something that is beautiful.

Your focus works like a camera, because what you focus on with intensity will dominate your reality
and it will become true for you.

For example, I could focus on what's wrong in my life...and make
myself feel miserable...or I can focus on the things that are working in my life right now, things that
are beautiful and things that I have...and feel better.

I'm not saying there aren't problems in someones life. But what I am saying is that it is our CHOICE
on what we will focus on .... and how we will feel in our life.

The productive and empowering way to handle this guy life is to have him ask himself

1. What's working in my life? It can't be all bad...what's something that is actually good in my life?
2. What's something I can do RIGHT NOW to start moving in the direction that I want in my life? It could
be take a run, or read a good book...or talk with somebody who has experience in the area I want to be
good at.

What this guy has done is he locked himself in a box of being an affect in the world, and completely
forgot that he has the power to actually do something about his situation.

A man can make his heaven out of hell...and he can also make his hell out of heaven.

So start with those 2 questions, and then make ONE ACTION towards where you would like to be in your life.

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 Post subject: Re: Garbage Self Esteem
PostPosted: Fri Jan 17, 2014 5:43 am 
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Haha. Reminds me of me. But just not that awful. I also always feel down and shitty. Can never seem to get off this pessimistic state of mine that my family had fueled me years ago since I was born. But I always try to seek help and try something new.

Sure you'll suddenly drop back down to pessimism but if you actually realize it, you'll see that you've made good progress. So reward yourself.

Like mentioned before your focus is off on the wrong direction. A good way to get it back on track is to meditate and be aware of how you should feel and how you're feeling right now. I swear once you see it, it will come through like an epiphany.

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"Don't try to change who you are. Don't even think you're not good enough right now. You ARE good enough being who you are. Women can smell a fake man the same way you can smell cheesecake."


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