I need to learn how to stop hating women so much. I know that I have to accept them and respect them to form a genuine bond with them, but I have difficulty because I hate them extremely for the game they make us play.

How do you come to look at them positively? I only see them as assholes I want to have sex with.

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AFC Level 1

Howdy again Eerie,

This isn't an easy task, given that women often treat us like shit if we act like AFCs around them. I know I was severely plagued by anger towards women for decades of my life. Still, you don't necessarily need to become a "feminist" to love women, since a lot of feminists don't like men much. You just need to start learning how to put yourself into a woman's shoes more, and give her some slack for being an imperfect human being, just like you are.

Here's an important point to remember... it's not the case that women are really playing a "game", like monopoly, with a bunch of f*cked-up rules they make us play. Instead, they are DANCING with men. Dances don't have so many rules (especially once you get good), but they do have patterns. Dances are fun, flowing and dynamic, which are all characteristics that women fit naturally with. Ever noticed that women frickin' LOVE to dance? Well, there's a reason... and they "dance" with men all the time in their lives, even if men don't notice it. This is why "game" isn't so much about rules as it is about "flow" and "genuine masculine character" and "easy charm". Once you get this you'll find women a lot more fun to interact with.

I'd suggest you do the following exercise once a day for a week or two:

• Identify a behavior that you HATE that women act out.
• Identify the behaviors IN YOU that tend to bring out women's bad behaviors.
• Try to put yourself in the woman's shoes, and imagine "if I were her, why would [behavior X] make her react with [behavior Y].
• Rethink the situation: if you were her, would it really mean you were an asshole if you responded with behavior Y to a man's behavior X?
• Finally, think of a new behavior Z that you could try out that might avoid a woman's responding with Y and responding with A instead.
• Try the new behavior Z when you get a chance and see what happens.

Do this with one nasty female behavior per day, until you've run through the major ones that drive you up the wall. Once you can see the REASONS women have for doing what they do, and once you see the ALTERNATIVES that you have to your own unproductive behavior, you can start to get out of the anger-against-women frame and into the how-can-I-solve-this-problem frame, which is much more productive and life-enhancing for you.

Try it and see how it works, and report back...

Cheers, ~50

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--== I'm just learning this stuff too, so take everything I say with a grain of salt and follow your intuition ==--

One for instance would be:

The woman flakes on dates.

My behavior typically is courteous and assertive in what I want.

So maybe I could change myself and be disrespectful and demanding to see how she responds to that to not flake.

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AFC Level 1

I think you are thinking simply and going for the exact opposite. In my experience, the more I learn and know, the less black or white situations I`m in.

Women are incredible criatures that teach you lessons if you are concious and paying attention.

The best advice someone could ever give you in here regarding your case is to make a female FRIEND.

We puas or aspiring puas tend to see women as potential fucks and that`s all; how about changing the focus for a while?

This happened to me at work, my best friend at my workplace is a female and she`s awesome, also tons of puas that are at high levels have lots of female friends. There must be a reason to it. Figure it out.

When you share moments and experiences with a woman that you don`t want to get down with, your mind shifts, you think different; you are more aware and socially smarter.

I have three females that are currently friends. I'm not sexually interested in two of them. I still can't understand what women have to offer other than frustration and problems.

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AFC Level 1

It sounds like you're using sarcasm to reinterpret what I say so that it becomes trivial. This is not the way to learn. If someone gives you a tip, appreciate it, because most people don't give a sh*t about helping you. Learn to appreciate and take advantage of all wisdom you're offered (I'm not claiming to be wise, but I do have something to offer here). Because if you don't, people will stop wanting to offer you any assistance.

Learn to learn, dude...

If you're not being sarcastic here, then there's something to learn. You emphasize courteous, but think about it, why would a woman want COURTEOUS in a man who's going to invite her out? EVERY guy is courteous! This doesn't mean to have to be an asshole, which will just backfire on you, but think about this: what ELSE are you offering her that no other guy offers her? Are you offering her funny? Sexy/provocative/erotic? Fun times that she won't want to miss out on? Assertive is good, but it has to be assertive PLUS something positive she wants.

~50

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--== I'm just learning this stuff too, so take everything I say with a grain of salt and follow your intuition ==--

I'm smarter than most other guys. I know lots of things. I an information jeopardy machine. I can talk about any intelligent subject but what women wants that? I can go blabbering on about the politics behind the Cuban missile crisis, but that would be boring. I can talk about my passion for history and racing but none of them care about that. I have nothing but sex to offer.

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AFC Level 1

Sorry about the sarcasm I'm just hating right now. Women have never been good to me.

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AFC Level 1

Don't worry about it. I was where you are once. Women treated me like complete SH*T for many years (especially in high school, but later as well).

Part of the battle will be learning to really respect yourself for your own gifts. The fact that you're really smart is a place to start... make the commitment to yourself to never indulge again in any negative thinking about yourself, and to replace those ideas with others that more truly reflect what you have to offer (to the world, to your friends, to your family, to yourself... and yes, to women). You won't always succeed, but with practice you will come to respect yourself much more. Because really, as long as you're working hard to better yourself in life, which most people don't do, you have something to genuinely respect right there.

If you want to break out of the "hating-feeling hated" circle, I'd suggest you read the book "The Art of Possibility", by Zander, and really put the principles found there to work. It will help your game, you'll start having a lot more fun in life, and all of a sudden it will be clear how it is that you can respect yourself and the women you're seducing much more.

You're on the way, just don't stop!

Cheers, ~50

_________________
--== I'm just learning this stuff too, so take everything I say with a grain of salt and follow your intuition ==--