Hi guys. Just a question I have been thinking of.
Where the heck did most of us got everything wrong? I mean, all our AFC perceptions about how to gain a woman's heart and that we need to be Mr.Nice and soo polite, asexual and educated. Shit, is it from cheesy songs? fairy tales? soap operas? freaking Shakespeare? It seems that most guy's "default" beliefs about the nature of relationships, dating, mating and stuff are just plain wrong. How so?


Any comments will be appreciated.


P.D I posted this on the "attitudes.." section but I guess it is more suited for the "misconceptions" section. sorry for double posting.

because the media and entertainment projects an image of the world where females rule, you see it everywhere. it's also because all the dating advice you get from women is total BULLSHIT!! listening to your mom, sisters, neighbor etc. they all say they want a man who can treat them well... basically they want a guy who is a fucking lapdog. this is just what they feel they want, not what thier instincts tells them, so when you meet a woman with the proper attitude (men rule women) , inner & outer game etc. there will be a button in the females brain that will just click! she can't fight herself! oh, and propably because our dads already had given in to the control of our mom and we percieved that as "how to be a man" and by watching other nice guy dads...

fairly true man. Yeah, that the world is dominated by women and that we even see our dads being made beta is so true. TV shows, especially comedies, portray men as always being stupid, dumb, silly, while women take all the control and are smart and all that stuff. I HATE that for sooooo long have I been tricked into thinking I should be really nice and polite and giving and generous and get few results from this. In fact, I realize that the few times I have had girls like a champ was because I was being alpha without even knowing about it!


keep posting mates.

in my view it all starts from the (correct) understanding that the reproduction of our species depends on female choice. we are acutely aware of that ever since our school days. the smarter ones amongst us will circumvent that female power with routines and patterns, but these are skills very few men are tought.
this female right to choose has indeed been glorified in our culture, starting from the troubadours and knights who had to prove the sincerity of their feelings to ever so unconvinced damsels. it is as well a most potent female fantasy to be swept off her feet and the hollywood film industry satisfied that demand from the days fo rudolph valentino, if not earlier.
however, in my view, these misconceptions about female power should be relished, and not complained about, since they afford us so many glorious opportunities for seduction.

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be whom you wish to seem

Here's a snipet from an article that Sensei referenced in a newsletter:

"Deep down, women love men who stand up to them, who won't be pushed around. They love men who will look them in the eye and tell them to shut up when their hormonal bickering has become too much. They love men who will draw a line in the sand and walk out on them when they've had enough. They love men who know their own minds and are man enough to stick to their guns."

This is what most people obverse as "cocky" or "arrogant" behavior when, in fact, it's just a man being a man and defending his beliefs and opinions. Girls are like kids in that they are constantly testing you to see exactly how much they can get away with.

"They suppress their masculinity and present themselves as cuddly Mr Nice Guys, and won't project self-confidence in case it's regarded as unreconstructed machismo."

Since the 60's this has been the politically correct response for men, and it has had devastating effects on guys like you when you want to meet cute girls and get dates.

True.

"In recent years, men have been trained like circus seals to be inoffensive to women, and no longer know how to entice them and turn them on. Men are now generally terrified of women. They hold their tongues for fear of being misinterpreted as sexist; they constantly attempt to second guess their partner in order to avoid giving offence."
Except "naturals" have learned early on that women respond better to honesty and confidence. This isn't to say treat women poorly, but rather that these are their switches to let them know that this guy is different because he's not supplicating to their every request.

- Persuazn

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"I'm your huckleberry."

Hi Dorian,

That's a great question, man. God, I'd give anything to live in a world like the one I thought existed when I was a kid. Where you could care for a girl and tell her and then she told you she cared for you... a world like the one my old sister grew up in where you you could buy a girl an ice-cream cone and she would devote her life to loving you.

God, life must have been sweet back then.

But that's the thing, Dorian. We live in our times, and so we have to make the best of it.

I firmly believe that the PUA skills that we've learned are the closest thing to helping guys like us find true love in a world where it's so hard to find true love. I wish things are the way they used to be. But they aren't. So I became a PUA... because if becoming a player is what I need to do to get what I need, then that's what I must do.

Respectfully,

M

Dorian,
Great question- but don't be frustrated over where you were, be reinvigorated by where you are now.

As far as pop-culture references are concerned- if you're really looking for something that might help, watch Next and Parental Control on MTV. I think Dismissed is the new one, but I haven't watched it yet.

I'm obsessed with these shows- why? Because it's a front row seat to watching guys in action. They're only a half hour each and sometimes there's two in a row. Now I know a lot of you are going to tell me "the game is played on the field", of course it is. But watch the way guys interact with women on this show and see where they get it right, and where they get it wrong.

The guys who are most successful on Next are the guys that steal the frame from the women. They make it so that she's trying to impress him, not the other way around. Parental Control- a lot of the guys go wrong by being too sexual too quickly.

As far as your reference to Shakespeare- it's noted, but in many of those stories the couples are drawn to one antoher because they shouldn't be together- perhaps its a rebellion card or a fate card. Right person, wrong time/right time, wrong person. Either way they all end up dead in the end- so let's not be too envious of the Shakesperian loves.

You're right though, it's not easy, but at least it's not out of our control. Good luck!
~Irony

I think the women in our lives tell us they want "Nice Guys" not to fuck us over, but b/c as married moms, that's what they want after years of marriage and menopause. They're not prime HBs anymore! All they want is romance and someone to take out the garbage! Our prey wants us 2 be real! And Fun! And a Challenge! And not a Doormat!

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