OK, so I've noticed that I lean in a lot when I talk to a woman if it's a loud environment. There's actually a good reason I do this...having been a musician for many years and not always having used hearing protection like I should have, I've lost the very top end of my hearing (most folks can hear frequencies to around 20KHz - 21KHz...mine is down to around 18KHz - 19Khz)...in a loud environment (like a dance club, live music, karaoke, etc.) that small loss of hi-frequency hearing makes it difficult to hear words over the background noise without getting closer.

So, body language expertise says leaning in when talking to a woman is bad body language...gives power to her. However, I try to make it a point to lightly touch cheek to cheek when I talk in her ear and/or sit or stand closer to her to make the leaning less obvious...getting that simple physical contact going should be a good thing, right?

So, given my limitation...how can I better make this an asset rather than a liability? Ideas?

Thanks guys,
Gruuve

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Divorced dude having a good life.

I don't have any ideas, but I know how appetizing it is to a woman when a man leans over and whispers in her ear... try to match that with ur problem, see what it gives... something like "my hearing's bad, so lean in a bit more" or anything, just a thought

I think you just hit on a good idea...try to get her to lean into me more rather than me leaning into her. Let me think about that one...

Gruuve

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Divorced dude having a good life.

2 things I wanted to mention.

1. Have you tried reverse-pecking yet, its really simple, kind of just turn your head with your ear towards them and tilt it slightly and they'll get the hint to lean in towards you, its never failed for me before and its probably like a universal gesture.

2. Theres nothing necessarily wrong with leaning in (in my opinion) if shes also leaning in too. If you're leaning way over to talk to her and shes not shifting her body position at all, then thats bad. But if you're both leaning in equally or shes leaning more into you than you are into her, that can be good. Just personal observations.

No, I haven't but I'll give that a try. Thx!

Gruuve

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Divorced dude having a good life.