| I have always been the smiley, having fun, cracking jokes type of personality... usually genuine but sometimes slightly forced to keep the energy of the room up. That is, until this summer I started experimenting with not smiling.
I got a job as a waiter, and my manager would somehow be a total magnet with people and I couldn't figure it out, so I began trying to pick this apart. I will always remember the day I started doing it, I got to work and he said in the most monotonous tone with zero facial expression "morning sir". It wasn't like he was upset, he was just like bleehh type of action, and my reaction was to use my high pitch voice and get excited and say "Morning Terrence how you doin man?!" and he said in the same tone "fine sir hby" and I kept my dandiness up, trying to impress him almost. Right after the interaction I was like what the hell why did I just do that.. and then I tried to emulate him. I began experimenting with this. Instead of coming up to my tables and being all "Hey guys! Welcome to alladdins I am jeremy blah blah blah I like your shirt blah blah" I would go in with a completely low tone, and say morning or afternoon everyone, in a "I really don't care at all" type of expression, and it worked pretty well. I began infusing this more into my personality, and people gave me the following changes in reactions
-First off, before this I would turn lots of people off. Old ladies loved me don't get me wrong, I was the "nice good looking young man", but if it was a family, the dads gave me no respect, the hot girls all were totally turned off by me, etc etc (and I already am good with body language, witty tongue, good with people). But after this, girls almost started becoming more mysteriously interested in me, they would not give me the usual "oh he's beta" type of look I used to get. I now get interested looks.
-People love my jokes.. like a lot... it is so fuckin weird. I have numerous examples of this, but it seems that when I literally just relax entirely, not care at all, and don't show any emotion/expression... people love it. During class I used to try to be the really friendly nice dude, which got me a ton of friends but never hot girlfriends.. now I get the entire class laughing when I say the lamest, no emotion/expression type of joke. For instance, I was giving a little speech which I was super nervous for... so I did the whole relaxed thing, and a girl walked in right in the middle, I looked at her for a split second, and just said "you're just in time for the best part" and continued speaking.. and the entire class was busting up laughing. Or when I was at the gym yesterday, my buddy who is awesome with girls was trying to talk to her, and I went up with absolutely no expression just to see how it'd work against his awesome personality.. and she was fucking dying at my simple "oh you haven't partied with me yet that's why you're bored" and she was asking me to take her number down. Partied with her last night (got too drunk, but she definitely loved me all night).
-I don't have to try to "pump myself up to state" anymore. I used to use the find something you think is absolutely hilarious right as you walk in the door type thing (I find farting a bit too funny, and would imagine a few times I had some absolute Jack the Rippers and I'd be cracking up), and the dudes would love me, some girls did, but if I was talking to hot girls they all just gave me the "go away" type look, or "I am gonna go find my friends but I'll be back". Now I haven't had a lot of field testing at parties without smiling, but I went to the bar and the super hot bartender that knows me as a regular, and usually is turned off by my smiling personality, wouldn't stop talking to me. I didn't even say anything that cool, nor did I care at all. Also I talked to a dude and had no laughter going on, smiling, or anything really. And he was cool as hell, we talked for a long ass time about Oregon and he thought I was fuckin awesome, we plan on jamming this week.
So in the end, I think I am actually going to infuse this into my personality for a while here. I am a bit more quiet now, almost never laugh, don't have to put too much effort in, and get better reactions... strangest fuckin thing but I feel like this is a solid change. I am worried my family will be asking me what's wrong because they know me as the giddy high pitched voice type of dude.
Anybody else have this type of experience?
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