i dont have a very confident body language most of the time when i am at work or in public places.

i just cant stand properly in one place for a given period of time. at work i have noticed these 3 posture patterns that i keep repeating when standing.

i tend to lean on the wall with one leg up alot b/c i dont know how to stand properly
i tend to hide behind this podium at work b/c it keeps my posture straight .
i sit on the counter, sitting-leaning, with bad posture .

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i cant sit more than a few minutes with my back straight when sitting, i always tend to slidedown on the chair or sit in a way with my back arched. its a bad habit i have gotten into as well.

hey buddy. I used to have bad posture untill I joined air cadets (military) and it improved my posture. I also play Wii Fit but if you dont have thoes the best thing to do it try putting your thumbs on your back pockets, it will force you to open up, also your feet should be shoulder width apart.

This may also help. People have a natural back posture where your spinal cord has a natural curve. If you relax your body it will allow your back to straighten properly.

Hope this helps

Yeah, the military will definitely help you sort that out. I still can hear my platoon NCO growling in my ear that if he saw a curve in my back that day, he was going to rip my balls off and shove them up my ass... It worked! The downside is that my line of work stuck me back in front of a computer for most of the day, so certain bad habits crept back. Not everyone can join the military, so here's what I've done to correct the problem:

• 1) Contract your stomach muscles at all times. This instinctively straightens you out a bit. Then draw back your shoulders. Any time you notice you're slouching, remind yourself to do these things and soon they become instinctive. If it helps, have your friends or family give you a slap on the back of the head if they catch you slouching. Another technique I use is to always imagine that a girl is checking me out - that always gets me at attention and I make sure to straighten up.
  
  2) Keep both feet on the ground as much as possible when standing or sitting. Particularly when sitting, lots of back problems come about when you're twisting your body or putting all your weight on one ass cheek. Your body compensates for muscle pains or strains with bad posture, so minimize them.
  
  3) Exercise. With bad posture, the support muscles become really weak to the point that even if you know good posture, it's hard to maintain it. Strong abdominal and back muscles make a HUGE difference with posture. Work situps and some kind of rows into your regular routine, and you'll find it's much easier to maintain good posture.
  
  4) Stretch. This kind of goes with exercise, but stretch you back out every day. It sounds like you have to stand up a lot for work, and sore muscles will definitely tighten up. 12 years ago, I hurt my back in school, and I got a great book of shoulder and back stretches by Bruce Lee that I use religiously to this day.

Anyhow, I hope these help you out. It's not easy, but it does get easier over time. Damn, if only we'd listened to our moms when we were younger and straightened the fuck up at the dinner table!

made me laught .... true though

Go rent Top Gun and study Tom Cruise's body language, ultimate Alpha male.

Even though you're clearly showing poor body language you're close to being there. Leaning against the wall with one leg crossed over the other, toes touch the ground gives off a somewhat bad-ass look. Similar to the way the classic leather jacket smoker leans against a wall. Other than that, make sure your shoulder blades are back, head held high, good smile, and legs more than shoulder width apart as much as you can. Body posture is one indicator a woman will notice before meeting you. It's very important as it creates an image of you before you even get a chance to say hello.

To make this easier focus hard on building a strong core at the gym.

thanks ... great advise