Are you afraid of blowing away in a strong gust of wind? Tired of looking in the mirror and seeing vermicelli arms and Tinker Toy legs? Does your little sister ask to borrow your clothes... and threaten to beat you up if you refuse? Do you ever look at the 45-pound plates in the gym and wonder when you'll be able to use them? Sick of answering questions that remind you of the one subject you try to avoid?

You aren't alone: Lots of guys share your hypertrophy-averse physiology. Many of them manage to work their way into more mirror-friendly proportions. I'm one of them, and I report to two former skinny bastards who grew up to be Testosterone Muscle editors.

A select few end up as coaches who help guys like us get bigger, stronger, and more athletic. I talked to three of them: Joe DeFranco, a strength coach based in New Jersey who works with elite high school, college, and pro athletes; Vince DelMonte, author of No-Nonsense Muscle Building; and Craig Weller, a trainer based in San Diego and popular Testosterone contributor who's a former member of the Navy's elite special-ops forces.

I locked the three of them in a room and wouldn't let them leave until they filled my tape recorder with nutrition tips, training strategies, and lifestyle adjustments that they've used to help themselves and their clients work up to larger shirt sizes.