This is my first post, sorry if I put this in the wrong place but it seemed like the best. First off, I'm 19 and currently a sophomore in college. I pretty much found this site only because someone linked me the videos for the Pickup Artist season 1. However after watching both seasons it really inspired me to get into it, so I started reading all over these forums the past few hours.

Now for my problem. When I was in high school i was pretty much the biggest World of Warcraft nerd you can possibly imagine. I'd never ever go out of my house, it was just go to school then come home and play games. However once I got to senior year, I finally quit and started trying to turn my life around. I started to do new things and fell in love with skateboarding, going to the gym, playing guitar and more.

However, my past of being extremely non-social in high school is starting to hurt me now. For the most part, I'm walking around alone at college every single day and go straight home after classes (I don't dorm). I only have about 5-6 friends I see around very rarely (and NONE are guys). 90% of my old friends either left for other colleges or still only want to play video games so I don't hang out with them as much. There are no school clubs for anything I like doing. I eventually want to go clubbing but I don't really know the right people for that.

As for girls, I can approach them, but I pretty much always end up being the nice guy and their best friend. I'm supposedly extremely self-conscious and the biggest over-thinker/analyzer on the planet. I guess the question I'm looking for is how to improve myself and my network when I'm pretty much starting from ground zero in college. I guess you can say that I just wanna be the guy everyone always sees walking around with friends and having a good time. I've gotten help from the few girl friends I have to change my hair and how I dress, and I will probably read those books by Neil, Mystery, and David DeAngelo, but that's it for now. Any step in the right direction would be appreciated.

I'm pretty much on the same boat as you. In high school I was somewhat anti-social but we can't worry about that now because that was the past. My advice for you is to make friends from your classes. Start small by talking to the people you sit beside.

Face your fears, do what you believe you can't do, expand your comfort zone...

It's cliche advice, but it's also very good advice. The reasons you find it hard to make friends, or hard to go beyond the friend zone, or whatever it may be, is because you have limiting beliefs that you can't do it.

Just know that it is definitely possible, and that those limiting beliefs will not change unless you face those fears.

So try flirting with girls, try socializing with as many people as possible. It might be awkward for you at first, but it'll definitely pay off.

make things and just be social go to the gym make some friends with big guys get laid in shower epic. No seriously if you aint got no friends i suggest to go outside the house and eventualy you end up meeting people mby not first day but you will!!!

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I try to meet girls in classes but im always too formal and go into interview mode because I just wanna keep the conversation going and not hit an awkward silence. I just can't flirt with them until I know her pretty well and by then its too late of course.

As for guys, I think that they are 10x harder to befriend than girls in my opinion lol. However I feel that they are more important to befriend because if they are good with girls, ill sort of pick up on things a lot faster.

I'm the same as you. I commute to a small school where everyone knows each other. I'm 19 and a sophomore in college.

Freshman year I didn't make ANY friends until after trying my best to make friends in class (real friends not, fake friendships.) all year long. I made 2 friends by the end of freshman year.

This year I'm commuting again. I spent the whole summer trying to break out of my shell after reading The Game and MM., and determined to improve my social skills and game. I've already got major confidence boost from trying to break out of my shell. I just decided I was going to be friendly to everyone I fall into conversations with, and just have fun with it.

When you talk to people in class DON'T go into interview mode. That's what most guys do and you will not stand out at all which is dull. If you're in interview mode neither party is enjoying the conversation. Try to stand out in class by being yourself in a passive aggressive manner (hope that makes sense.) If you come on too strong people will think you're creepy. One great thing I've learned from this site that I am constantly reminding myself of in "the field" is to leave the person you're talking to better than you found them.

Oh and I was addicted to WoW for two years in highschool too. Fuck that game.

Good luck buddy.

I am 30 and graduated college with my Bachelor's degree in 2004. I remember my social life was fairly crappy other than living in the dorms my first semester freshman year since I started off my major in Mechanical Engineering, which had virtually no girls in the major. I took a ballroom dance lesson, and my sophomore year, I started taking classes in ballroom dancing. This helped a bit with my social life.

-Chicoman

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