I find myself in a predicament similar to that which many of you may have heard in the past, yet I find that the plethora of available solutions don't seem to help me. There is a lot that defines this situation so I'll do my best to be concise and cover everything. In essence - I have a hard time establishing social proof.

Let me start at the beginning.
I have moved a lot in my life. My childhood friends and I have parted ways long ago, my high school and college friends live in different countries. I am currently 24, studying for my masters in physics, and am having a very hard time getting a social life. I can't meet new friends through school because, well, as a whole - graduate physics students are socially awkward and very uninteresting on a personal level. I feel that if I would create such a circle of friends I will become like them over time. This forces me to find alternative ways to cultivate new friends, but I don't seem to be successful at it.

Now, before you jump on me and point out how many posts like this actually exist on the forums - let me address some of the issues they aim to solve and why they don't work for me:
1. "Work out." - This is a non-issue for me. I am in extremely good shape, I look good, I feel good, and I project it.
2a. "Talk to people." - I understand, the goal of this "exercise" is to become comfortable talking to strangers. This isn't a problem for me either, I am not socially awkward and I don't have a confidence issue.
2b. "Talk to people." - Aside from the pedagogical value of speaking to strangers, some experienced PUAs are capable of talking to a complete stranger and creating a new best friend (in the case of other guys) or a prospective lay/gf/f-buddy (in the case of women). As I said, I am not socially awkward, but I'm not a social butterfly either. While I am perfectly comfortable starting up a conversation with a complete stranger, I am incapable of turning it into a meaningful friendship
3. "Try online dating." - I did! I actually found I'm very good at it too. I have the option of a second date about 90% of the time and I even managed to get some first date lays. But the problem comes around the third and fourth dates when the issue of "meeting my friends" arises. As soon as a girl finds out that I have none - she goes running for the hills.
4. "Get a hobby." - I tried this. I tried a chess club, spinning class, and a martial arts class. I talked to people there, and I was successful in establishing basic friendships - but that's where it ends. They never invited me to come out with them and their friends. I, on the other hand, cannot invite them to hang out with my friends because - well - I don't have any friends I hang out with. If I try invite them to just go out with me alone I come across as a loner in desperate need of friends.

I could go on, but this is already long enough and number 4 summarizes the issue: I have no friends and as a result - I'm having a hard time meeting new friends.

So. If you're still reading and you have some brilliant suggestion that will turn my life around I'd love to hear from you.

-Mitch

Ok well this is quite a complicated question. I can't promise to turn your life around though.

The reason why people you meet don't communicate with you often is because you don't follow up.

1. Take their phone number and text them often just to say "hi"

2. Search for them on facebook and chat to them there.



The fact is people will stop talking to someone if that person doesn't give them any value. You have to keep talking with people. If you see them in town justr say hi.

You have to make people feel like you have a genuine interest in them and you have to do that to everyone. That's the main reason why some people have so many friends and everyone seems to like them for no reason