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The title pretty much sums it up. I need to improve on my conversation skills, how to get into good conversation and to keep it going. I've realised that while i was growing up my friends used to have 95% banter during the conversations we used to have, so it was basically a group of lads making statements instead of having conversations and this has fucked me up really lol.
I've tried making conversations but i seemed to be overshadowed, spoken over or not paid much attention to. I've been loud, i've been confident but i think it's the things i say, it just isn't interesting. Anyone got any books or any tips that will help me?
Thanks
Pay more attention to when people are speaking. Actually listen instead of being so concerned about what you are going to say next and it will make the conversation natural. Guys who start in pick up tend to get so involved in routines and such... They forget that women are humans as well.
Start looking for what is called a conversation hook point... They are certain topics that are brought up during an interaction that you can elaborate on and add more depth to the conversation. For example... If a girl says "I went skiing in Denver last spring." or whatever... That gives you 2 conversation hook points... "skiing" and "Denver." Instead of saying "cool." You could say something like "OMG! I've always wanted to go skiing!" Or "I love skiing!" or "I love Denver! I went there 2 years ago with blah blah blah" or "I've never been to Denver! I heard it's a really awesome place to visit! What else did you do there?"
This way, you aren't trying to make it sound like her skiing in Denver was actually that cool of a trip that she has to try and talk about for 4 hours... It probably wasn't THAT cool of a trip........
Another tip too... Mix up statements and questions in your interaction. It will keep others engaged. By asking all questions... It will make it seem like an interview. By making all statements... It will make you sound like you are full of yourself.
Hope this is helpful bro