Hey guys,

First off, when it comes to girls, I get along with them really well, talking with girls as friends comes more naturally than guys even.

Second off, my natural personality is super energetic and funny. I'm also NICE (damn!), I have a smile on my face 99% of the time, which I've read is kind of bad.

At times I'll even be a bit goofy to get laughs out of girls, I can get girls howling at times, but from my understanding/experience humour shouldn't be taken so far that you're expected to be in a good mood and joking ALL THE TIME.

Now, my whole issue is obviously the friendship zone, I find friendship occurs so fast that the whole idea of sexual attraction seems like it'd be far gone. Is it ever possible to get out of this? How do you recover if so, how do you even start?


Next off, and the main reason I started this thread, is the views girls have on you of being "cute" (as in adorable).
I've had times where girls say, "you're so cute!", even in a little squeaky voice etc., and as much as I (oddly enough) like this, I wonder what impact it has on game and the general view of girls on you.

My assumption are that if a girl finds your laugh, personality etc. "cute" then you're totally fucked right? Scientifically I'm guessing it displays that you're not really the manly-archetype of attraction, which ultimately is what is a prerequesite for confident girls to go down on you.


I'm just really lost on what to do, I've always stuck to "be myself" (I'm confident, but I'm also goofy at times and thrive off of laughter, which only gets me more worked up), but scientifically it goes against woman's attractions, and plays entirely into friendship. If I were to be a serious, cocky, but ever so slightly humorous guy all the time it'd be like holding back a storm since I get so excited around girls at times.

I'm just tired of getting trapped in the friend zone, my only ideas so far are to dedicate days strictly to pretending to be the ideal guy, get a number etc., then revert to my old self after a relationship or something.

ARG, has anyone ever had a predicament with their natural personality like this before? Is there a way to build sexual attraction around this to incorporate my natural personality?

Hey mate! First off, there is nothing wrong with the smile. In fact, many guys already fuck up by not smiling. ALWAYS SMILE when you game. It communicates that you're in a good mood, you're confident, and you're fun. Nothing bad with that. Being humorous is also a very attractive feuature. What you lack, is sexual energy, sexual tension. You need to be a sexual man. Girls won't really have sex with you unless you talk with them about it. At least, that's my general experience.

Just a very simple example I had with a girl I've known from the university. Thing to note I was messing with her like all the time... She drew a cute cow on the board, I drew a cloud with a lightning that killed it. Another time her hair was in front of her face and I slipped it back. Extremely naturally. No thinking... in fact it was later that I realised what I'd actually done and that after that I should move immedieately. So I invited her and here's a small part of the texts(not exact)

Me: Really the only thing that scares me are wasps. Hate the stingy bastards.
Her: Haha I think I'm gonna buzz when I arrive just to freak you out.
Me: That would be nice but to make it more exciting you could get up some wasp-like dress. That's kind of sexy too.
Her: Haha, silly.

She didn't come in a wasp-dress but I fucked her anyways. Next time we texted I called her Buzzy. She liked it and was laughing at this for lilke days. So as you see, it's really important to get sexuality involved in the convos somehow both physically and by words. Also note how I've built a connection with this wasp thing. This too was kind of spontanious lol I really don't like planning shit. Good luck bro!

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What I like in life is nothing more but living it.

Don't act like you're not interested. Make sure you sub communicate that you are interested in her for more than just social reasons. Deal with the fact that this is gonna mean losing a TON of possible no-fuck girlfriends. You DON'T have to be every girls friend, and losing something that is not what you are looking for is not that much of a loss. swing for the fences.

Damn bro you just named my exact issue until I was like 21 or 22. I was always told by all these girls I am a great cute funny guy that any girl would be lucky to date. Every time I would chat with girls I would like we would become best friends, one girl we even got so close we slept together(literally not sex) all the time with no chance of things becoming more.

You need to elevate things more, increase touch, intimacy, and show your self more as a sexual mate, not a friendly mate. The problem is even if you are attractive to the girl you are putting yourself in the friend zone by NOT elevating.

The fact that you smile a lot is not bad, the fact that you joke is not bad, the fact that you are nice is not bad, I've been the nice guy who gave a girl a ride home who needed a ride, and I assure you I joked with her and had fun, but I still messed around with her at the end of the night. It just comes down to as not being just a nice guy but a nice guy who would be a great sexual mate as well.

As for your adorable comment, I've been disappointed that a few girls called me that, but at the same time I've also messed around with a couple of them and could have messed around with all of them. So it isn't necessarily a bad thing unless you make it that way.

I do joke about dates and sex now a lot. One of my lines with a girl I work with who has a crush on me is on pay day, "have you made enough money to pay for our dinner yet?" Man she is frustrated with how much attraction I have built and yet not capitalized on it. She got pissed last week and told "stop fucking around with me" she wants me to take her out so bad. I suppose I will capitalize on it this week, but I try not to mess around with girls I work with anymore, she only works one day a week in a different department so I figure I can get away with it. It is easy, just make sure they don't think of you as a friend, they see you as a attractive mate.

Another thing is you should bone up on studying attraction signals, a lot of the time period I thought I was ending up in the friend zone I also missed a lot of opportunities with some very attractive girls because I didn't notice they were attracted, so naturally they moved me over to the friend zone. Now I can maintain an attraction and build on it should I wish or I can be the nice guy who ends up in the friend zone because I am not attracted to them or because they dated a friend already. Body language is your friend I suggest you read all about it, if you are like me, it will help a lot knowing when someone is attracted to you, rather then thinking they all just think of you as friends. Be careful not to confuse them being attracted to you(liking you) and being sexually attracted to you.

If you want me to be more specific I can but it is really pretty simple.

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Just another guy from back in the day.

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